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Social aspect - 9/12/2009 1:25:30 PM
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charity7
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I do understand the no issue that homeschoold kids are not getting socialization--Can you give me a 2-3 sentence you would give someone thinking about homeschooling but is wondering about this issue?
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RE: Social aspect - 9/12/2009 2:25:07 PM
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shadowspring
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There is great value in learning how to get along in society, understand the many different kinds of personalities, beliefs and values in the world. But public school is not the only place to experience life.
The world is full of many kinds of people, and as a home school family, we have ample opportunity to sample it: community sports leagues, our neighborhoods, volunteer in the community, visit elderly relatives, field trips and community youth clubs like Scouting, Sunday Schools, community theater and really as many opportunities as we want to be involved with.
Socialization with all age groups and over many interests is better than being confined to people your own age in one common situation, which is what public school socialization is all about.
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RE: Social aspect - 9/12/2009 2:27:01 PM
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shadowspring
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Now if the home school family is question is one of an isolationist patriarchal type, they can't answer like I have above. Not sure what they would have to say.
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"Blessed is the man...whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and in His law meditates day and night. He will be like a tree planted by rivers of water..." from Psalm 1
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RE: Social aspect - 9/12/2009 3:54:26 PM
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Sunnymom
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My absolute shortest in-a-nutshell answer would be "As a parent you can enjoy providing and guiding in the very best social opportunities for your children."
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RE: Social aspect - 9/12/2009 4:31:48 PM
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boolee
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From: smyrna, Ga
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Life is about getting along with all ages not just your particular age group and I would tell anyone that asked that my child isn't afraid of or intimidated by older people and she loves to be around anyone that is willing to listen to her talk. She is also willing to listen to them. She has had the opportunity to call and become friends with a doctor, teachers, salespersons, waitresses, etc. I know alot of kids that have never been around elderly people and are really scared to death of them. Yes, she may be missing out on the bullying that takes place in schools and social clubs but is that really a bad thing.?
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RE: Social aspect - 9/13/2009 8:48:48 AM
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zoebob
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quote:
Yes, she may be missing out on the bullying that takes place in schools and social clubs but is that really a bad thing.?
I know some that would say yes unfortunately.
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RE: Social aspect - 9/14/2009 10:56:48 AM
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rainafaye
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My husband just wrote an article about this on our homeschool website. He wrote about three of the most common questions we get asked about homeschooling. We have our boys in a cub scout pack, church and neighborhood kids who are over a lot, etc... Believe me my boys get socilization from other kids their own age as wel as adults.
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RE: Social aspect - 9/14/2009 11:03:38 AM
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RJR_fan
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"If we consent to the communization of our children, we have no grounds for resisting the communization of our goods." I might be paraphrasing, but that is Catholic scholar Zachary Montgomery's bottom-line conclusion from his research on truancy laws in the 1880s. In state after state, when truancy laws went into effect, juvenile crime skyrocketed.
"If we give the bureaucrats our children, we might as well give them everything else," J. Gresham Machen said in 1928, when he successfully scuttled an earlier attempt to create a federal department of education.
If we are willing to hand our own children over to the government, we have no grounds for self-respect.
If you are an educrat, then socialization means -- transforming the children of Christian families into docile state-worshiping socialists. Obviously, this can only be done in a government facility.
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RE: Social aspect - 9/14/2009 1:30:27 PM
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W.O.F.
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Your children will have the social skills and abilities that YOU teach them, and what YOU provide for them, based on their ages, and the appropriateness of the activity.
In other words, you have a great opportunity to raise caring, loving, compassionate children who know how to work in soup kitchens, clothing donation centers, senior centers, daycares for homeless children as well as church and club activities.
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Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning, Satan shudders and says, "Oh no, she's awake."
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RE: Social aspect - 9/14/2009 2:16:12 PM
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stateofgrace
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Most of the homeschool parents I know personally provide a lot of different opportunities for their children to experience socialization...participation in sports, activities at church, classes through homeschooling co-ops, etc. Yes, as a hs parent you'd have to search out these opportunities for your child, but most parents do, regardless of their child's educational environment.
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RE: Social aspect - 9/15/2009 7:43:44 PM
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hillbillywoman
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One of the reasons I homeschooled my kids was so that they would be PROPERLY socialized.
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RE: Social aspect - 9/18/2009 8:38:28 AM
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sen10tious
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My opinion on this has changed A LOT since my kids graduated. I am seeing these questioners in a whole new light. It used to be that I was defensive on this question. Now that I know my kids have excelled in melding into "real life society," I don't feel the peer pressure anymore. (Hallelujah!)
Rather than trying to "defend" the social opportunities offered by homeschooling, I have begun to see that many people who ask such a thing have problems with their own socialization. Some of the public high school kids I have talked with have been downright aggressive about how bad homeschooling is. I realize that these accusers are immature, ignorant, and highly motivated to defend their own turf of public education. But they are also behaving like poorly socialized brats. Seriously, their brains are so bent that they cannot imagine how anyone could become a well-socialized person without the crutch of a classroom school.
These kids do not really believe in freedom the way I define freedom. For them, freedom is being allowed to party. For them, freedom is given by the government; it is not an unalienable right granted by their Creator. They will fall for the panem et circenses, the bread and circuses method of governing: give the people food and entertainment and they will vote for anything.
They don't define "education" as knowing the academics either. For them, school is about success. Cheating is okay as long as it does not physically hurt anyone. If cheating emotionally hurts someone, then pfft! that person was weak. School is important to them because it gives them networking to get ahead. I have been told--with a straight face--that public school makes them more tolerant of others; as if this is a virtue denied to homeschoolers. All the while they were being radically intolerant of parent-directed education because their parents are not experts.
MY POINT IN THIS OVERLY LONG POST ¨ People who ask this question accusingly and not out of curiosity will not understand your answer no matter what you say. They do not want to understand your answer. They want to look for more cracks so that they can justify themselves.
I would not stress over finding the perfect answer.
If someone is truly thinking about homeschooling but is worried about all the anti-socical propaganda they have been exposed to, then my 2-3 sentence response that the OP asked for is this: Laugh comfortingly and say, "Honey, mankind survived for thousands of years before they built Oak Park Elementary (substitute name of their local school). I'm sure your kids won't forget how to talk if they don't go there every day."
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RE: Social aspect - 9/18/2009 10:17:31 AM
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stateofgrace
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"Socialization" was a big factor in determining whether or not to homeschool my younger daughter (HS Junior) this year.
I found that in our area, the social environment really deteriorated at the high school level.
Now, my daughter brought some of the problematic environment on herself (IMO) when she chose to forgo advanced placement classes in her freshman year, in the belief that they would be too difficult. So she got placed into the non-advanced-placement classes, where there were likely more kids not making a real effort. She would have been in some advanced placement classes this year if she had stayed in public school.
But beyond the issue of being in classes where there are kids who are not focused on their studies, who are even being disruptive to those who are trying to focus on their studies...there were other social environment issues.
My daughter is getting plenty of socialization without going to public school. She works a part time job at a restaurant (where she sees kids from her old school, and from church), she gets lots of socialization through church, she goes to several dance classes a week. In the second semester this school year, she will be taking one or two classes through the community college. The environment there is bound to be better than it was in the non-advanced-placement classes at her high school, and she will have the bonus of earning college credit before graduating from high school.
There are so many options these days; home schooling really allows us the flexibility to tailor our children's education so much better to their own needs, abilities and challenges.
< Message edited by stateofgrace -- 9/18/2009 10:24:56 AM >
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RE: Social aspect - 9/27/2009 11:39:26 AM
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timf
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Public school is probably the worst place to develop well rounded "socialization". What you usually get is social dependence. You find children so uneasy with others of a different age or able to function on their own that they can sometimes cease to function.
One can justifiably look at the age segregation of public schools and ask if it child abuse.
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RE: Social aspect - 9/28/2009 3:39:10 PM
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W.O.F.
Posts: 1653
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From: an ignoble beginning
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quote:
ORIGINAL: sen10tious
My opinion on this has changed A LOT since my kids graduated. I am seeing these questioners in a whole new light. It used to be that I was defensive on this question. Now that I know my kids have excelled in melding into "real life society," I don't feel the peer pressure anymore. (Hallelujah!)
Rather than trying to "defend" the social opportunities offered by homeschooling, I have begun to see that many people who ask such a thing have problems with their own socialization. Some of the public high school kids I have talked with have been downright aggressive about how bad homeschooling is. I realize that these accusers are immature, ignorant, and highly motivated to defend their own turf of public education. But they are also behaving like poorly socialized brats. Seriously, their brains are so bent that they cannot imagine how anyone could become a well-socialized person without the crutch of a classroom school.
These kids do not really believe in freedom the way I define freedom. For them, freedom is being allowed to party. For them, freedom is given by the government; it is not an unalienable right granted by their Creator. They will fall for the panem et circenses, the bread and circuses method of governing: give the people food and entertainment and they will vote for anything.
They don't define "education" as knowing the academics either. For them, school is about success. Cheating is okay as long as it does not physically hurt anyone. If cheating emotionally hurts someone, then pfft! that person was weak. School is important to them because it gives them networking to get ahead. I have been told--with a straight face--that public school makes them more tolerant of others; as if this is a virtue denied to homeschoolers. All the while they were being radically intolerant of parent-directed education because their parents are not experts.
MY POINT IN THIS OVERLY LONG POST ¨ People who ask this question accusingly and not out of curiosity will not understand your answer no matter what you say. They do not want to understand your answer. They want to look for more cracks so that they can justify themselves.
I would not stress over finding the perfect answer.
If someone is truly thinking about homeschooling but is worried about all the anti-socical propaganda they have been exposed to, then my 2-3 sentence response that the OP asked for is this: Laugh comfortingly and say, "Honey, mankind survived for thousands of years before they built Oak Park Elementary (substitute name of their local school). I'm sure your kids won't forget how to talk if they don't go there every day."
AMEN AMEN!!!!!
_____________________________
Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning, Satan shudders and says, "Oh no, she's awake."
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RE: Social aspect - 9/29/2009 11:02:17 PM
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janaleigh
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I always try to turn it into a positive...BTW I usually only get this from the grandma's because those that know my kids see that they do well socially. They are both in high school now.
"It's been so great, since we started homeschooling, my kids have had more time for sports, time with friends and outside activities. They get more social activities now that they have a more flexible schedule."
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Jana married to Mike for 20 years
2 boys ages 15 and 17
Home schooling for 7+ years and loving it!
http://www.homeschooljungle.com
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RE: Social aspect - 10/1/2009 9:49:50 AM
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seekingmyLord
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quote:
ORIGINAL: charity7
I do understand the no issue that homeschoold kids are not getting socialization--Can you give me a 2-3 sentence you would give someone thinking about homeschooling but is wondering about this issue?
Usually, my daughter says it all--just five minutes with her and they don't usually bring it up again.
However, to answer the question in a general way:
Socialization is something about which every parent should be concerned, however few homeschooling parents are because their children are usually busy socially with wholesome activities. If you were confident that you can teach your child at home, don't you think you would also be confident that you provide the opportunity for your children to socialize with a variety of children and adults as well?
< Message edited by seekingmyLord -- 10/1/2009 9:58:38 AM >
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RE: Social aspect - 10/1/2009 9:12:20 PM
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bzirk
Posts: 1429
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Where the deer and antelope play
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sen10tious,
Like sen10tious I like to ask questions. Usually I ask something about someone's school experience and whether or not they feel that school is where they really learned to socialize. Most of the time they'll laugh and say no. Most of them realize they learned it from their parents, siblings and other family, and what they may have learned at school had to be unlearned -- especially how they saw themselves. Maybe I'm wrong about that, but it just seems that most people feel like they have to be deprogrammed from school, so when you get them thinking about that, they begin to realize that socialization at school AIN'T what it's cracked up to be. LOL!
Oh, and the other thing I say, "If my children were any more socialized, I couldn't survive." I have four children who do not know what shyness is, and yet know how to speak to people in a way that's respectful AND interesting. At least we (my husband and I) have been told that by so many people we've lost track. Yes, I have four social butterflies. Wears us out sometimes.
< Message edited by bzirk -- 10/1/2009 9:20:33 PM >
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RE: Social aspect - 10/6/2009 8:58:50 PM
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stateofgrace
Posts: 1585
Joined: 4/12/2005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: bzirk
Oh, and the other thing I say, "If my children were any more socialized, I couldn't survive."
No kidding. It seems to be at its worst right before they get their driver's license.
Even with only one at home now, I have been running her around every evening after work for something or another, and with the transition to home/online schooling for her, there have been a lot of odds and ends I've needed to pull together in the last few weeks..
DD#2 was off to College for a Weekend at Liberty University this last weekend, and I almost didn't know how to handle actually having time to myself.
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America Needs Revival. Will you commit to pray for it?
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RE: Social aspect - 10/7/2009 9:42:48 PM
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hillbillywoman
Posts: 56
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When I attended school (1968 thru 1981), the motto among teachers seemed to be that we do not attend school to socialize. We attend school to learn. That changed with my kids' generation. Now the teachers seem to think kids can't learn social skills unless they are caged up all day with others like them.
The Bible says, "If the blind lead the blind then they will both fall into the ditch."
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When momma ain't happy, ain't NOBODY happy!
( author ? )
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RE: Social aspect - 10/9/2009 7:02:26 PM
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bzirk
Posts: 1429
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From: Where the deer and antelope play
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Liz,
You are so right about that time right before they can drive themselves. Just about wore me out. Now I've got a few years until my youngest gets a license. The other three were really busy. I was SO READY for them to drive themselves.
quote:
ORIGINAL: hillbillywoman
When I attended school (1968 thru 1981), the motto among teachers seemed to be that we do not attend school to socialize. We attend school to learn. That changed with my kids' generation. Now the teachers seem to think kids can't learn social skills unless they are caged up all day with others like them.
The Bible says, "If the blind lead the blind then they will both fall into the ditch."
I remember teachers saying that. In fact, it was said a lot during my years in school.
BTW, I've never thought you were old, but I thought you were my age. You're several years younger! LOL! I find that happens a lot -- that I'm one of the oldest parents. That's the price for starting so late I guess.
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bZirk
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RE: Social aspect - 10/10/2009 8:31:20 AM
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W.O.F.
Posts: 1653
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: an ignoble beginning
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quote:
ORIGINAL: hillbillywoman
When I attended school (1968 thru 1981), the motto among teachers seemed to be that we do not attend school to socialize. We attend school to learn. That changed with my kids' generation. Now the teachers seem to think kids can't learn social skills unless they are caged up all day with others like them.
The Bible says, "If the blind lead the blind then they will both fall into the ditch."
I was blessed to be in a small rural school from 1974-1981, then I attended Christian school from 1981-1987....and my teachers' motto was the same...but a few years after me, in the public school, it seemed to change...a lot of those teachers retired I suppose.
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Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning, Satan shudders and says, "Oh no, she's awake."
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RE: Social aspect - 10/10/2009 1:16:53 PM
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Homegrownkids
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quote:
Oh, and the other thing I say, "If my children were any more socialized, I couldn't survive
I just took two of my kids to homecoming last night. The more I see the teen world, the more i want to kick them in the teeth. I was disapointed to see how well my children "fit in".
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