|
|
|
|
|
Users viewing this topic:
none
|
|
Login  | |
|
The single pet parent support thread. - 3/25/2009 12:41:49 PM
|
|
|
joy2give2u
Posts: 5187
Status: offline
|
You know we single pet owners need a thread of our own.
Sometimes individuals with children just don't understand how hard it can be, as singles, to raise a pet as if they were your child.
I, for one, need support and help.
HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
_____________________________
A Christian community should be a place where our common purpose is strong enough to make our differences of secondary importance.
Lake Michigan
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/25/2009 12:57:21 PM
|
|
|
tlims
Posts: 484
Joined: 7/6/2007
Status: offline
|
lolol!!
Ah, Joy2, I feel your anixiety.
Yes, it is very hard to raise a pet by yourself. The litter/housebreak training, the food -- there are so many types! The why doesn't he/she come home at night. The list goes on.... I count myself as fortunate that I have had kidlet help in raising said petlets.
And thinking of the possibility of a "step-petlet" often puts potential mates off.... oh the woes.
So what exactly is your problem my dear?
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/25/2009 1:20:26 PM
|
|
|
joy2give2u
Posts: 5187
Status: offline
|
LOLOLOL well currently my problem is I am laughing too hard to type.........
_____________________________
A Christian community should be a place where our common purpose is strong enough to make our differences of secondary importance.
Lake Michigan
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/25/2009 1:46:58 PM
|
|
|
tlims
Posts: 484
Joined: 7/6/2007
Status: offline
|
But.. but...
Joy2, he looks much too cute & innocent to give anyone problems!! Look at those eyes! That happy smile! The wiggly tail! He's looking up at you so adoringly!
I think you must be a very good pet parent 
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/25/2009 2:10:47 PM
|
|
|
tlims
Posts: 484
Joined: 7/6/2007
Status: offline
|
quote:
My petlet has abandonment issues.
What can I do? I can't help or explain how college causes me to pop in and out constantly.
She is so affectionate and then she remembers how upset she is with me.
Lately, she's taken to scratching up the furniture - however will I make her understand college is the only way for me to get a good job to get that schfancy new collar she's so taken with? hahaha!
-reba.
Have you tried logically speaking to your petlet? Sometimes this can help.
Telling the petlet how you DO love her but right now, this is what you must do....
I would just mention as you leave, "Boo-Boo, I'm going to college now! Be good"
(** side bar: yes, I really had a dog once that if I didn't tell him that I was going to be gone overnight, would sit at the door of my parents house waiting for me --- and if I told him that I was going to be gone overnight and would see him on Sunday, he would be fine!! go figure that one! silly dog!)
Yes, as with all petlets, you must acknowledge their emotions... letting her have a few minutes of time to pout, then affectionately calling to her will help quite a bit.
(**side bar: yeah... said dog from above? when I brought #1 baby home from hospital he worked with me -- sniffed her & etc... when I brought #2 baby home from the hospital, he turned his back on me and when I brought the twins home? grrr..... he didn't even talk to me! but then he went from being my only baby, to being a "step-petlet", to having "step-siblings"! oh my! the abandonment issues poor petlet went thru!)
Mentioning to her that the fancy collar is on your to-do list might be a good thing too. Petlets need to understand about budgeting. How else will they get by in the adult petlet world?
You sound like a very concerned petlet parent. But petlets will be petlets. Don't let it get to you. 
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/25/2009 2:15:05 PM
|
|
|
joy2give2u
Posts: 5187
Status: offline
|
Well here is my problem.........
Wait I had better give some background first for those who do not know me.......
Gilly boy, as my father fondly called him, belonged to my father and I was just the aunt who held him in the evening and took him for walks.
He and my father were very close and though Gilly is a big boy he spent much of his time sitting on my dad's lap listening to music or reading books with my father.
Though I bought Gilbert dog food, most of which I found hidden in the crawl space by mice when I cleaned out dad's house, my father insisted in feeding him what ever he was having to eat. If dad made a hamburger for lunch he made one for his boy as well. He even put it on a bun with the same toppings my father put on his sandwich.
At my father's house Gilbert had a doggie door and would come in and out at will. His house was way out in the country and had a big fenced yard. Next door, on each side of my father's fence were other dogs, Gilbert's friends, who ran the fence barking with him. Every morning and evening Gilbert and his friends would run up and down the fence line yelping and barking with delight.
Present Day
I live in a house, in town, with a huge fenced back yard without a doggie door.
Gilbert will not go outside unless I go with him. He is nervous with the city sounds and doesn't like the smell. It is too different.
Though two neighbors on the north side (the yard is huge and the fence covers the back yard of two houses) both have dogs........they come to the fence to say hi to Gilbert but they will not run it with him........he stands there his tail wagging just waiting to start the race.......one of the dogs will take a step and gilbert will start his sprint only to stop less then a fence post down when he notices the other dogs are not coming......then he goes back and tries to get them to run again...........he looks so sad when they go in the their houses........
He gets so sad he won't even chase his toys.......he just comes and sit down at my feet and looks sadly into the neighbors yard.........
I don't know how to get the dogs to play with him.
But my bigger problem right now, I have been taking Gilbert for walks so he can interact with other dogs, is the dog food.
I have gotten him to mostly start to eat dog food but he will only do so if I sit on the step next to him and tell him what a good dog he is for eating it and petting him after each bite.
Last night I refused to do it and told him he could just go to bed hungry.........
Well it did not work as I thought it would........
Twice he got me up thinking he needed to go outside when instead he wanted to eat..........the first time I sat there with him for 15 minutes while he ate.......and then I had to stand outside for another 10 minutes with him because he was too scared to go out by himself.............
The second time I ended up sitting on the step with him for 45 minutes........he would eat some as I petted and told him how good he was and then he would come put his head on my lap and we would talk then he would go back to eating...........
He went outside, now realize this was at 3:30 in the morning, and wanted to play soccer with his ball..........I ended up staying outside in my rob and slippers for 20 minutes playing soccer with Gilbert..........the neighbors probably think I am a vampire or something.........
Now some may say this is not an single's issue but it is........my father passed away almost two years ago and Gilbert was fine because the girls, my sister and her husband still all lived in my father's house........It has only been since Jan that Gilbert and I have moved to this house.........It was so much easier with Gilbert when the girls were there for him to play with as well.
Seriously I don't know what to do......I need help.
_____________________________
A Christian community should be a place where our common purpose is strong enough to make our differences of secondary importance.
Lake Michigan
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/25/2009 3:17:49 PM
|
|
|
tlims
Posts: 484
Joined: 7/6/2007
Status: offline
|
ok here are some of my thoughts.....
first, I think you are doing really well ---- petlet was living in the country before, now he's in the city. That takes some time for any petlet to get adjusted to.. (---btw. we're doing that now w/ our petlet -- before we moved he had acres in which to play -- now nothing but a small fenced area -- good thing he's small! And honestly? I'm having a hard time too --- very hard to get used to city sounds again when you haven't had any for years.... and if it's hard for me, why wouldn't it be hard for the petlet?)
Sounds like he had a lot of time & attention with his dad -- then lots of time & attention from the girls? so he still doesn't know quite what to do w/out the attention, very understandable.
Slowly removing yourself is the best and rewarding w/ a treat when behavior is met.... although, it sounds like that's what you've been trying to do. Even though you are frustrated, it sounds like you are doing what petlet needs..
Maybe setting up certain times every day to play... and only doing it then? It's going to take a lot of consistancy, but I wouldn't get up in the middle of the night to play with him... if you do, he won't learn it's not to be done.
Food: for some reason with my petlet, my father decided that the only way my petlet would eat was if he had a "juice" to pour over his dry dog food. It was more like after cooking a meal, he would swish a pan with a little water & poured it over the food -- after that petlet would not eat his food dry! And, it was cheaper than buying canned dog food!
Since Gilly ate a lot of people food, maybe trying something like that would help?? Might give him the flavor of people food, without giving him the actual food.
And I would say, only praise when he's doing what he should.... as hard as that is.
It's only been since January since the girls moved? Then you've probably made more progress than you realize. 
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/25/2009 3:43:07 PM
|
|
|
joy2give2u
Posts: 5187
Status: offline
|
quote:
Lately, she's taken to scratching up the furniture - however will I make her understand college is the only way for me to get a good job to get that schfancy new collar she's so taken with? hahaha!
-reba.
I know Reba it is hard......how do you explain to a dog why you changed their entire life and turned upside down....????
_____________________________
A Christian community should be a place where our common purpose is strong enough to make our differences of secondary importance.
Lake Michigan
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/25/2009 3:53:25 PM
|
|
|
joy2give2u
Posts: 5187
Status: offline
|
quote:
And honestly? I'm having a hard time too --- very hard to get used to city sounds again when you haven't had any for years.... and if it's hard for me, why wouldn't it be hard for the petlet?)
Me too tlims..........I really hate the city...........even though the back yard is fairly dark and has lots of trees the smells and sounds are still so different............I knew I would miss stars and silence but not how much I would miss it.
I was thinking Gilbert and maybe one of my problems is I feel so sad for him and feel bad I leave him home all day, except for running home at lunch to let him out, and then am often gone till seven or eight at night.............it just doesn't seem fair to him to not give him some time and attention at night...........
I have a hard time cooking dinner or unpacking things because he stays right at my heel and I am always tripping over him.........agrrrrrrr..
When we first moved in he would not get out of my bed.......he insisted in sleeping with me.......now at least he only stays in the bed for a half hour then he gets on the floor by the bed which is what he did when dad was alive..............
How do you not feel like a bad parent to your petlets when you are a bad parent to them?
_____________________________
A Christian community should be a place where our common purpose is strong enough to make our differences of secondary importance.
Lake Michigan
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/25/2009 9:17:04 PM
|
|
|
pruned
Posts: 1582
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: offline
|
Joy, I understand your angst. When I first adopted my dog, I left her in a crate 8 hours a day. I felt really bad about this. However, I no longer keep her crated, but I did leave the crate out. So, now, during the day... that's where I find her when I get home. She goes in when I am walking out the door in the morning. At lunch today, I couldn't initially wake her up to go outside. So, it seems she would sleep somewhere using the same space when I'm not home, and she chooses to use the crate. The question is... why do I feel badly if the door to the crate is locked?
On the other hand... I don't feel bad. My dog is not my child, she is my dog. I know that's not necessarily a popular opinion about pet ownership... but I was raised on a farm, and it's very difficult for me to confuse people and animals.
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/26/2009 11:22:52 AM
|
|
|
joy2give2u
Posts: 5187
Status: offline
|
quote:
p.s.... did I ever tell you that one of my twins nicknames is "Joyful"? When I see your name, or when I write Joy2 --- it reminds me of her! But don't be surprised if I get confused and call you "joyful" ok? Is it the one in the article? She radiates joy..........or at least sure looks that way in the picture.
Agapetos is that munchie in your avatar?
Gilbert and I had fun this morning.............he wanted me to get up at 5:30 so put his paws on my bed and laid his head near mine and kept making a sighing sound..........I tried covering my head with the blanket which always worked for dad.............and Gilbert did get down but then he laid on the floor singing the blues..........it was so funny I couldn't help but start laughing..........once I started laughing he got all excited and wanted to play...........
I love that dog.........he sure does keep me from getting lonely.
I did realize something.......or I think I did.
I noticed each time he woke me up I could hear ambulances............I am wondering if he is still uncomfortable with them since the only two times he ever heard them before was when my father was rushed to the hospital then a week later when they after he passed away..............I think, since he never heard them at the other house except for the two times, he may be just checking to make sure I don't leave him as well.........do you think that is possible?
_____________________________
A Christian community should be a place where our common purpose is strong enough to make our differences of secondary importance.
Lake Michigan
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/26/2009 11:29:30 AM
|
|
|
agapetos
Posts: 9776
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: This side of the lil duck pond!
Status: offline
|
quote:
Agapetos is that munchie in your avatar? Yep. I need to change it to a better pic of her though. My purrrrrfect little kitty.
quote:
do you think that is possible? Yep.
_____________________________
Stovie, Stovie, what am I going to do with you!
Maggie
September 09
My blog
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/26/2009 12:33:23 PM
|
|
|
sunshinesoprano
Posts: 447
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: Georgia
Status: offline
|
OH this is a great thread!!!!
I'm a single pet parent...though my mom and I share parental duties, I suppose.
We have 4 cats, though, which are completely different from dgos.
One of our cats, Baby, (aka Peewee) the munchkin tabby, insists on breaking every mini blind we have in the house so she can get to the sunshine. They don't go outside, so I can't say I blame her.
Buddy is the youngest and he bites things..including our toes!!! His nickname is Kramer because he enters a space just like Kramer enters a room. He's very strange.
Melody was abused as a baby before we got her and is very insecure. Ari, the big cat, seriously intimidates her.
Ari, the 5 year old Maine Coone, has a serious attitude problem at times and likes to intimidate the other cats with this largeness.
Ari is definitely our problem cat. He likes to escape to the front porch, which wouldn't be a problem except for that part of our screen is out, and he'll escape and never come back. They're all declawed in the front so he'd nevr make it.
He's the most stubborn thing I've ever seen. He's really like a 2 year old child. Tell him to stop, he'll get right back up until you put him in the time-out crate.
But, I love them dearly. They're my little furry blessings!!!
_____________________________
Pure Heart-Fresh, Progressive Southern Gospel
Sing, laugh, love, PRAISE!
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/26/2009 1:08:51 PM
|
|
|
agapetos
Posts: 9776
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: This side of the lil duck pond!
Status: offline
|
Poor Macy. I was unable to tolerate the antibiotic I was on too so had to change so I can identify.
Munchie has never been known to refuse some chicken stock (from boiling some chicken meat, not from a stock cube) if offered when she's not feeling 100%. I've added a carrot and stick of celery before too (she lets me eat the meat/leftovers!).
_____________________________
Stovie, Stovie, what am I going to do with you!
Maggie
September 09
My blog
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/26/2009 2:50:37 PM
|
|
|
LabGuy
Posts: 1114
Joined: 9/22/2007
From: NW Pennsylvania
Status: offline
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: agapetos
Poor Macy. I was unable to tolerate the antibiotic I was on too so had to change so I can identify.
Munchie has never been known to refuse some chicken stock (from boiling some chicken meat, not from a stock cube) if offered when she's not feeling 100%. I've added a carrot and stick of celery before too (she lets me eat the meat/leftovers!).
The vet suggested something similar to encourage her to drink more. (One reason she keeps having urinary problems is low "throughput".) She suggested mixing a little broth into her water. Right now though she does need to eat the specialized food to deal with the crystals and inflammation in her bladder. Once that's cleared up I plan on trying the broth to help keep things, ah, flowing.
-Robb
|
|
|
|
|
RE: The single pet parent support thread. - 3/26/2009 8:17:45 PM
|
|
|
hotsaucygma
Posts: 5042
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: offline
|
Can a single grandparent of petlets join in? I know it's a little different than petlet-parenting, but the kitties think they should be spoiled daily and that grandparenting petlets is just the normal way it should be  .
When their Dad left them with me and didn't live with us for awhile, they kind of adopted me as pet-parentandgrandpetparent all in one. They haven't seemed to suffer from detachment disorder though, so we must be doing something right. Even now that Dad is here again, they seem to do fine with sharing us and have stayed in charge of the situation quite nicely.
Poor Gilly, he's having a tough time adjusting, hmm? Sounds like he's getting there though. I would second the notion of not getting up in the middle of the night though.
Have you tried feeding him at the same time you eat? Maybe putting just a tiny bit of whatever you are eating in his dish with his doggie food? But then, maybe that would just encourage him to hold out for people food instead of doggie food. Hmm, a real dilemma Joy! Maybe some broth on his food would do it for him too?
Petparenting isn't for the faint of heart. It is a committment- one that may make you committable at times, .
Right now my Zabba grandkitty is pretending to be sooo sweet and cute. She is stretched out in front of the fireplace warming her toes... and I'm sure plotting her next strategy to keep her grandpetparent on her toes! Wouldn't want me to get too comfortable, ya know.
_____________________________
Arrogance boasts. Confidence is quiet, it has no need to boast.
Wisdom from an email I received a few days ago.
|
|
|
|
 New Messages |
 No New Messages |
 Hot Topic w/ New Messages |
 Hot Topic w/o New Messages |
 Locked w/ New Messages |
 Locked w/o New Messages |
|
 Post New Thread
Reply to Message
Post New Poll
Submit Vote
Delete My Own Post
Delete My Own Thread
Rate Posts |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Forum Tools
Printable Version
I'm still having difficulty with her treatment. She seems unable to tolerate the antibiotic they put her on. She stopped eating again Tuesday. Thankfully she hasn't thrown up again (at least not yet) and I got the ok to discontinue it. (I skipped this morning's dose until I heard yea or nay back from the vet, so it should start clearing out of her system. She took two days to regain her appetite this past weekend, so hopefully she'll be normal by Saturday.) 
