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What is happening to me? - 6/20/2008 9:56:55 AM
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jckm
Posts: 11
Joined: 6/9/2008
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I have been so confused lately and I just don't know how to deal with it. I know that having doubts about my faith is going to happen. But lately I have just been really confused about it all. One day I am so sure of everything and I can feel that God is right there with me, and the next day I will be wondering if He was ever really there at all. I have even been having a hard time praying lately- its like I forgot how or something.
How do I deal with this? How do I fight all the doubts? 
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RE: What is happening to me? - 6/20/2008 10:08:59 AM
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blue1914
Posts: 323
Joined: 6/21/2005
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Has anything changed in your life recently-have you had a trauma of some form, are you dealing with a big situation?
Also, have you stopped hanging out with Christians? Are you still attending services regularly?
Finally, are you reading the Word of God on a regular basis?
If you have stopped fellowshipping and reading the Word regularly, might I suggest that you change that-if you are dealing with doubt, believe it or not, a good place to start to regain it is in the beginning-for the past 2-3 weeks I've been reading in Genesis and really praying for UNDERSTANDING for everything in it. It's amazing how learning about God from the beginning (all over again) can change your perspective on who He is. If you are going through something difficult, it's easy to end fellowship and reading of the Word-but instead of running AWAY from God, now is the time to run TOO Him.
Please reply with details around the questions above if you get the chance, thanks!
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RE: What is happening to me? - 6/20/2008 10:17:58 AM
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wintery
Posts: 1267
Joined: 2/1/2007
From: nw alabama
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Judges 16:28 And Samson called unto the LORD, and said, O Lord GOD, remember me,
1Samuel 1:11 (Hannah) And she vowed a vow, and said, O LORD of hosts, if thou wilt indeed look on the affliction of thine handmaid, and remember me
Nehemiah 13:14 (Nehemiah) Remember me, O my God
Job 10:9 (Job) Remember, I beseech thee, that thou hast made me
Psalm 25:7 (David) Remember not the sins of my youth, nor my transgressions: according to thy mercy remember thou me
Jeremiah 15:15 (Jeremiah) O LORD, thou knowest: remember me, and visit me
Luke 23:42 (thief on the cross) And he said unto Jesus, Lord, remember me
We want God to remember us. This is Scriptural. We should recall all that God has done for us and remember who He is.
Remember the former things of old: for I am God, and there is none else; I am God, and there is none like me, Declaring the end from the beginning, and from ancient times the things that are not yet done, saying, My counsel shall stand, and I will do all my pleasure:
(Isaiah 46:9-10)
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RE: What is happening to me? - 6/20/2008 10:25:34 AM
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jckm
Posts: 11
Joined: 6/9/2008
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quote:
Has anything changed in your life recently-have you had a trauma of some form, are you dealing with a big situation?
Nothing traumatic or even bad--although my whole routine has been kind of messsed up with the kids out of school.
quote:
Also, have you stopped hanging out with Christians? Are you still attending services regularly?
Finally, are you reading the Word of God on a regular basis?
I have actually just recently become a Christian so I haven't even found a church that I really feel comfortable in. I haven't been reading my bible like I was before the kids were home all the time.
quote:
but instead of running AWAY from God, now is the time to run TOO Him.
I'm not trying to run away, I know I need His help with this but I feel like there is something keeping me from reaching Him.
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RE: What is happening to me? - 6/20/2008 11:01:04 AM
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blue1914
Posts: 323
Joined: 6/21/2005
Status: online
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quote:
ORIGINAL: jckm
Nothing traumatic or even bad--although my whole routine has been kind of messsed up with the kids out of school.
Actually, this statement and one that you make later may hold the key-it sounds like when you were in your normal routine, you were able to study the Word of God on a regular basis. With a change, it has become harder to do (and easiser to put off). Now that you are putting down your "roots" and grounding yourself in the foundations of the faith, this is one of the most critical times for you. Seemingly innocuous changes can have a profound effect-One parable that Jesus told was the parable of the seed and the sower:
Matthew 13:3-15, 18-23 (the Message)
3-8"What do you make of this? A farmer planted seed. As he scattered the seed, some of it fell on the road, and birds ate it. Some fell in the gravel; it sprouted quickly but didn't put down roots, so when the sun came up it withered just as quickly. Some fell in the weeds; as it came up, it was strangled by the weeds. Some fell on good earth, and produced a harvest beyond his wildest dreams.
9"Are you listening to this? Really listening?"
Why Tell Stories?
10The disciples came up and asked, "Why do you tell stories?"
11-15He replied, "You've been given insight into God's kingdom. You know how it works. Not everybody has this gift, this insight; it hasn't been given to them. Whenever someone has a ready heart for this, the insights and understandings flow freely. But if there is no readiness, any trace of receptivity soon disappears. That's why I tell stories: to create readiness, to nudge the people toward receptive insight. In their present state they can stare till doomsday and not see it, listen till they're blue in the face and not get it. I don't want Isaiah's forecast repeated all over again:
The Meaning of the Harvest Story
18-19"Study this story of the farmer planting seed. When anyone hears news of the kingdom and doesn't take it in, it just remains on the surface, and so the Evil One comes along and plucks it right out of that person's heart. This is the seed the farmer scatters on the road.
20-21"The seed cast in the gravel—this is the person who hears and instantly responds with enthusiasm. But there is no soil of character, and so when the emotions wear off and some difficulty arrives, there is nothing to show for it.
22"The seed cast in the weeds is the person who hears the kingdom news, but weeds of worry and illusions about getting more and wanting everything under the sun strangle what was heard, and nothing comes of it.
23"The seed cast on good earth is the person who hears and takes in the News, and then produces a harvest beyond his wildest dreams."
As we can see from the parable, sometimes it's simply life circumstances which come in to take what has been planted-and it sounds like in your case, it may be just that-as your life circumstances have changed, it's harder to stay in the same place you were when you first believed.
The way to combat that is to be the one who hears and takes in the News-by grounding yourself in the Word on a very regular basis because believe it or not, the "cares of this world" are carefully contrived obstacles set in your path in the spiritual realm (by the other side) to keep you from accomplishing your mission (hence the "illusions about getting more"-not REAL concerns per se, but spiritual roadblocks set up-by the other side-in the form of worries and doubts about "life" that can shift your attention. They seem real to you and they are real in the natural (car breaks down, etc. etc.), but they are not as bad as the effect they can have on your faith if you allow them.)
quote:
ORIGINAL: jckm
I have actually just recently become a Christian so I haven't even found a church that I really feel comfortable in. I haven't been reading my bible like I was before the kids were home all the time.
Oh brother (or sister) I will be praying that the Lord will change this for you "post haste" as you just can't make it out here on your own (especially as a new believer)-God made us to be in community-to bear one another's burdens, to encourage each other and to strengthen each other in faith-at a time like this, the companionship of faithful brothers and sister around you would have such a huge impact on your well being-they would be praying for you, lifting you up and holding you accountable. I will be praying for you now, but I do so encourage you to seek the Lord on finding a church home!
quote:
ORIGINAL: jckm
I'm not trying to run away, I know I need His help with this but I feel like there is something keeping me from reaching Him.
And please let me apologize -I was not trying to imply by any means that you were trying to run away from Him at all-I was speaking a little from my own experiences in that type of situation where indeed it does seem like something is keeping me FROM Him-it's not running per se, but it's not pulling close either-and it becomes a form of "de facto" running since He is moving forward and I am not moving with Him-see what I mean? He's not running away from me, He's just still moving and by standing still He gets further and further away as I stand watching Him move. That's also what I was referring to above-it doesn't seem like much, but those "cares of this world" that are pressing down are carefully contrived illusions from the other side meant to keep you from your goal.
Also, please let me a apologize if I have come on too strong-I sometimes jump in a little intensely, but this thread struck me deeply because I am currently struggling with issues of faith right now myself and I have had to confront exactly why-as I'm on the "road back", I see where I jumped off the path and what I need to do differently to ensure I don't derail again. Thank you!
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RE: What is happening to me? - 6/20/2008 12:39:26 PM
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_CANCELLED_
Posts: 165
Joined: 6/14/2008
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Someone online posted this. Thought it might help.
"His Word is The delivering factor out of all confusion and fear." For I have not given you a spirit of fear but of power, and of love, and a strong and well balanced mind." In John 1:1-2
If it's not something you know the Lord has given you, rebuke it, is what I tell myself.
_____________________________
And they said, Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and thou shalt be saved, and they house--Acts 16:31
Looking to buy1991 Won by One (out of) print by Argus Communications (see avatar) Leave PM here
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RE: What is happening to me? - 6/20/2008 2:56:54 PM
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jn1010lf
Posts: 232
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Hello jckm
When people have doubts or are confused, I wonder if they are a serious student of the Bible. Do they mediate on God's word? Are thy vitally linked up with a Bible believing church? God has to get inside of us and give strength to our inner man.
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RE: What is happening to me? - 6/20/2008 4:21:11 PM
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TrustingGod
Posts: 94
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The enemy (Satan) will do everything he can to defeat you. My friend at work is going through the same thing. She was so strong and excited about her faith for about 4 months and then BOOM. It was like her life turned upside down. She recognizes that she is still trying live in the world - trying to justify her old life and habits with her relationship with God. She knows it doesn't work but isn't ready to give it all up.
She feels like she is in a tug-o-war - God on one side and Satan on the other. But she knows she PUT herself there.
The enemy will steal, kill and destroy the things of God including His children. It sounds like you are under attack and need to submit wholly to God. Get back into the Word. Make time in your day for it - include the children - give them a craft project to work on if they aren't old enough to read.
DOn't rely on your feelings. KNOW that are His child and He loves you.
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RE: What is happening to me? - 6/20/2008 4:46:33 PM
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gibbin
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hi-
i can relate to yer sitch---and it FEELS TERRIBLE!!!! i'll pray for you and all the others going through the same---
and trusting up there is right on the money-----it has nothing to do with how we feel---and everything to do with His word.
don't feel saved---? meh! no biggi! the book says you are....
oh! ok.
don't feel like yer prayers matter? no biggi---the book says they do.
oh! ok.
also-
pray when you can't pray until you can pray---
( huh?)
that is---pray until you can break thru and pray easily---something like "help Lord! i can't even pray! arrrrgh!"
and then in faith keep praying---chore though it seem---until the "dome breaks"----
just keep pressing in--
also---you can sometimes just sit and be silent before Him, eh? it doesn't all have to be words---
check out good old ROMANS 8:26-27
Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.
And he that searcheth the hearts knoweth what is the mind of the Spirit, because he maketh intercession for the saints according to the will of God.
oh ! phew! we don't even know how to pray but the Holy Ghost intercedes!
yay!
sometimes just sighing before God---that's some fancy prayer!
also----
this might help---
once when i was walking at night the Lord said "do you see the moon?"
and i kinda rolled my eyes and said , yes, God, i see the moon....
the clouds rolled in fast---the moon was totally covered!
the Lord said , "is the moon still there?"
i said , yes, Lord, the moon is still there...
and Hes said- "you wont always see Me...."
and the wind blew and the clouds fled and the moon shone SO BRIGHTLY--
and i just cried for joy that He would do that-----
but it didn't sink in til later---a reasuring warning---
we don't always see Him---He is still there...
remember what He said to thomas, eh?
blessed are they who haven't seen and believe....
i encourage you to talk even more boldly with Him when you don't feel Him---
and pray even harder and bigger and bolder when you feel like you can't pray!
something like "ok God! i know that you can hear me and i feel lousy! BUT i'm gonna pray large! Father the nations please! Daddy! my people! save mighty God ! save!"
and keep going! pray for mighty things--revival in yer town!
souls and workers!
He hears you---you have His ear---go for it---tingly feelings or no---and that thick weight will lift---
it freaks the devil out---and honours our Lord....
He loves you VERY much----
and i would suggest that what's "happening" to you is a kind of early lesson---like the moon/cloud thing---
He is still there.
HOWEVER------
if it goes deeper than that and i am just being one of Job's comforters, well then that is kinda serious and you need to cry out to the Lord in a big way------
and , actually, either way---you need to cry out to Him---
press in as they say---
in a big way!
the enemy might be giving you guff---no biggie---the Lord IS God! He hears your plea--- draw even closer to Him---press in---get stubborn---and press in---
"Look God, i feel terrible! i don't even know that You are there today! arrrrgh! but You are the Living God! help me through this weird time!
i need You Jesus ! please, Help!!!!!!!"
He hears you, little one!
three cheers on being a new believer!
Hang on tight, baby!
He seems to quicken the new recruits!
press in and keep pressing in!
enjoy yer new church ( i'm sure He's sending one! )
and rest in Him!
what yer going thru is kinda common---
gets you hungry for Him, don't it? 
give glory to His name!
He loves you and will never leave you!
press in baby!
and keep us posted, eh?
LOVE!!!!!! gibbin<><
< Message edited by gibbin -- 6/20/2008 5:22:34 PM >
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RE: What is happening to me? - 6/20/2008 6:01:23 PM
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SonInMe1
Posts: 3621
Joined: 4/16/2005
From: my mom by God
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We all came to the Lord with "stuff". Some "stuff" just didn't disappear when we were saved.
These times you are going through...could....be God's tempering.
Look in yourself to see what God is trying to accomplish in these times. Is there something God is trying to "perfect" in you? A deeper relationship with God often involves looking at oneself with a true eye, seeing the things most people...just don't want to see.
Maybe its something else but my own expereince tells me, when God is distant...it ain't God's fault. So...if its not God....who...is it?
_____________________________
You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.
James 4:4
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RE: What is happening to me? - 6/20/2008 7:28:42 PM
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jckm
Posts: 11
Joined: 6/9/2008
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: blue1914
Also, please let me a apologize if I have come on too strong-
Not at all. I appreciate your advice and concern!
Thank you.
quote:
ORIGINAL: TrustingGod
It sounds like you are under attack and need to submit wholly to God.
I have thought that too and I know that is probly part of the problem. I'm not so sure I know how to do that though.
gibbin--
I read your post and then re-read it and I cried both times! I think part of it is that you made me remember how simple it all really is. I think I have gotten in my own way if that makes any sense! The other thing that you said that was so emotional for me was the moon story. I have a very similar story, but it was the sun. Thank you so much for making me remember that.
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RE: What is happening to me? - 6/20/2008 7:42:07 PM
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jckm
Posts: 11
Joined: 6/9/2008
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: SonInMe1
A deeper relationship with God often involves looking at oneself with a true eye, seeing the things most people...just don't want to see.
Maybe its something else but my own expereince tells me, when God is distant...it ain't God's fault. So...if its not God....who...is it?
This really hit me hard when I read it. I tend to have a quick temper and want things my way more than I should. I thought I was really getting a handle on it and then all of a sudden in the last week or so I see myself slipping back and I hate it. I don't want to be that person anymore. (and I'm sure my family would like to see her go too!) I know I can't expect to never get mad or anything like that, but I know I can control it a lot better because I did for a while.
You made me really step back and look at things and I realized how connected it all is.
Thanks!
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