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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 3/19/2009 12:12:17 AM
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thiricy
Posts: 27
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline
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sadly I'm in the same boat with you guys, I was free from porn and masturbation for a long time but recently fell due to difficulties. This site has been a great help to me and others
http://www.settingcaptivesfree.com/home/
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 4/9/2009 2:23:46 AM
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yeahright352
Posts: 15
Joined: 3/16/2009
Status: offline
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great site, great programs
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 4/9/2009 1:08:55 PM
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jn1010lf
Posts: 487
Joined: 4/20/2005
Status: offline
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Hello littlelionofJudah
I suppose there is no easy formula that we can use to get out from under the yoke of porn. However, I ran across this article on CBN. I give it, not to recommend CBN necessarily, but I thought the advice was good. So, here it is.
www.cbn.com/spirituallife/CBNTeachingSheets/Pornography.aspx
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 4/14/2009 4:59:49 PM
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DgL
Posts: 2
Joined: 12/21/2006
Status: offline
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I was addicted to porn. The Lord directed me to SettingCaptivesFree.com. I have not viewed porn since Dec 28th. It's a course by which you do a lesson a day. It was developed by a man that was addicted to pornography just like you and I.
There are some other great replies to your question as well. I pray the Lord directs you to where He wants you to be so He can set you free.
Trust in the Lord!
_____________________________
Dave
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 5/6/2009 3:43:26 PM
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dwain
Posts: 170
Joined: 3/4/2006
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I hope this helps...
The Lord loves you whether you look at porn or not. It is just thinking that I may not ever develop a serious or lasting relationship with a woman that scares me.
A christian woman would never hold it against you, or a christian man- they would just want to help.
I worked with a married lady who saw I was single and 36 at the time, and she told me to pray for a "wet-dream". What an insult! Nevertheless I have heard one of the faithful saints say that God can take us from paper dolls to happy men of God with a lot of "real" christian friends.
< Message edited by dwain -- 5/6/2009 3:58:46 PM >
_____________________________
http://www.home.earthlink.net/~dwainfred/thegoodnewsofjesuschrist/
http://www.home.earthlink.net/~dwainfred/
Deut. 33:27 The eternal God is thy refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 5/26/2009 12:20:01 AM
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dwain
Posts: 170
Joined: 3/4/2006
Status: offline
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Pray that the Lord would make you sick of it is another suggestion. That worked for me when I quit smoking.
Tell someone that cares (that you know and trust) that has more christian life experience. Go to people who are aware and sure of your good qualities and capabilities who you are confident of and that have a serious relationship with the Lord and are willing to accept you in spite of your faults.
A Celebrate Recovery meeting is a good place to "air" a problem with lust if there is a meeting in your area. (They have praise and worship before Bible study and group discussion)
http://www.celebraterecovery.com/?page_id=7
You can also do simple things like a walk, or making a prayer list and placing it on your keyboard or the wall next to your computer. The last I heard from an established ministry specifically on porn addiction was about a man who was happily married with a good job and 2 children who had been secretly looking at porn without anyone having the slightest idea. This habit was going on for
over ten years. One day He realized He couldn't hide from the God in Him any longer and sucessfully overcame his addiction. He was tired of hiding the fact He was miserable. His Pastor was more than willing to forget his admission.
One scripture that really helped me was,
Pss.81
[9] There shall no strange god be in thee; neither shalt thou worship any strange god.
I recieved this as a promise of God, if we love the Lord, which I am sure you do.
Praise the Lord.
< Message edited by dwain -- 5/26/2009 12:54:37 AM >
_____________________________
http://www.home.earthlink.net/~dwainfred/thegoodnewsofjesuschrist/
http://www.home.earthlink.net/~dwainfred/
Deut. 33:27 The eternal God is thy refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 5/29/2009 2:58:49 PM
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Taylorr
Posts: 9
Joined: 5/29/2009
Status: offline
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If it's online porn:
Go to google.
Search "K9 Protection".
Install it.
Put a random password in (without looking at what you're typing).
Copy & paste for confirmation.
Set which sites you want blocked and which ones you want to allow.
You'll never get back in.
I had to secretly do this on my friends computer because he would complain about being addiced. But, every time he would put a block on the sites, he would use a password that he would remember in case he changed his mind. So, I went on his computer one day with out him knowing, added the block, and only I know the password. xD He still hasn't been able to get on. Haha. (:
_____________________________
FORMER EMBRYO.
TaylorFknMartin@gmail.com
ThatTaylorrKid@aol.com
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 6/2/2009 7:36:15 AM
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dnp200450
Posts: 397
Joined: 5/30/2009
Status: offline
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I know young men in the church who got in to porn around puberty. Here are a few points I have to make. They are mostly based on conversations I had with church brothers and usually do not indicate my personally viewpoint. It is a different perspective though because one can see the problem includes, but not be solely caused by simple lust. There are many facets to the pornography problem that a spiritual counselor may need to know. This is my first week joining this forum so I would like to read your perspectives as well. I apologize in advance for my wordiness and have decided to sanitize some potentially offensive wording as not to offend any of my brothers and sisters.
1) Due to several reasons (some dietary) puberty is now occurring at way too young of an age (12-13 vs. 16-18). The mind of a 12 year boy combined with the urges of a grown man is a recipe for disaster!
2) Most boys brought up in the church know premarital sex is against the Bible. Yet their sex drive maybe very high. This is a potentially power keg.
3) Many young church-raised males are very awkward and uncomfortable around the opposite sex because they don't know how to relate to them. The very thing they are attracted too (females) is, in their viewpoint off limits and can be destructive as idolatry, witchcraft or drugs. In their minds, Adam/Eve and Sampson/Delilah maybe prime examples of what will happen if you actually let their body heart/body/mind/soul get possessed by with a woman. Some males may start to see females in a prejudicial light. This may feel pornography offers a “buffer”.
4) 99% of the talk/sermons at church that are related to sex are negative. I find many church guys can quote scripture after scripture regarding sex related problems such as; AIDS-STDs, pregnancy, abortion, adultery, fornication, incest, rape, pedophilia, domestic abuse, lust, bodily fluids, etc. Yet these “theologians” draw a blank if I ask them what the bible says is positive aspect of a physical relationship. Any type of physical relations to them might be considered way to problematic and risky. They may view pornography as a way to avoid all of that.
5) The body parts involved with sex are considered inherently dirty. So unclean in fact, the Bible has strict rules about sending a woman away who is bleeding. Also one of the reasons to circumcise is to help keep a “filthy” organ somewhat cleaner. Pornography does not require an interaction of with someone else’s “bad parts”
6) Young males take constant rejection much, much harder than many of us may realize. If the rejection is done in a mean spirited or demeaning way it can be particularly devastating. It makes them question their self-worth and destroys their self-esteem. Pornography never rejects them or breaks their heart like a woman can, they feel.
7) A lot of young males, actually males of all ages I talked to, feel like they are under never ending criticism by the church, the media and women for the cause of all problems. It is considered chic to male bash. Even pre-teenage boys are quite aware of how suspiciously they are viewed. By the time they are 18 many guys are almost apologetic an think good cursed them by making them male! Pornography does not bash them.
8) Related to #7, femininity is considered good and nurturing while masculinity is considered abusive. We have all heard woman say something to the effect of “that place contains too much testosterone for me”, everyone of course has a little laugh. That implies testosterone by nature is bad, it isn’t. I would never say, “Ladies, I have to leave this prayer circle because there is just way too much estrogen in here for me”! The attempt to feminize men is causing huge problems in the male population that I don’t want to get in now. Regardless, pornography does not criticize masculinity; it boosts it, albeit in a very twisted and negative fashion.
9) Why is everyone so surprised church males don’t tend to ask females out on dates, especially very spiritual females. Spirit filled women are highly respected by church males. So respected in fact, men may find the idea of dating, marrying, and ultimately having sexual relations with them very disturbing. I don’t want to offend anyone here but It would be the equivalent of having relations with a nun, Mother Theresa or worse, Mary. When I was growing up most of us, including myself, never once asked any church girls out. What people did not understand was that we didn’t look down on spirit filled women at all. We actually looked up to them as being on a spiritual plain that was on level higher than we Loser Neanderthals could ever achieve. Part of the reason was they many of the girls were trained to have that certain air to them that said, “I am holy, I hate the flesh, so don’t even think of approaching me”. So the guys felt they could not date church girls or worldly girls. Yet they were attracted to females. It was a catch-22, to say the least. Pornography or worse could encroach.
10) The God sees/knows everything concept. More reason to make sure you never, ever, try to approach in a romantic manner, sleep with, or break the heart of, or contributing factor in the “backslide” of one of God’s spirit filled children. People’s feelings get hurt in dating. Who wants to have to try to apologize to an enraged God who saw you hurt his Child?! It would be something akin to what would happen if you murdered a person of the cloth. I know this may seem really far out for those who are reading this. Hopefully there are a few of you who can relate to what I am talking about. The point is another barrier was placed.
10) Master****** was strictly forbidden in my church/family. Yet noct***** emiss***s if/when they happened, could be very, very embarrassing because they could be random and… well… disgusting. You better not let it get discovered by your parents on your sleepwear or bedding. You could not say, “it just happened”. The horrible yelling, spiritual guilt trips and scripture readings seemed worse than cancer. The absolute worse was if your parents “snitched” to your pastor. You would get berated again! All it took was it to happen once and you would make sure that never ever happened again. With pornography one could prevent the humiliation and spiritual interrogations from happening in the first place.
11) Waiting for “natures release” can cause physical problems for some people. It caused me to start having recurring infections. One time it was so bad I could not walk straight for more than a few seconds at a time or take classes. I actually visited a far away place for treatment and did not give my name or address on the paperwork and paid in cash to avoid detection. Then I was called in but did not feel it was proper “expose myself to the female doctor on duty. I then had to come back when the male doctor was on duty. I had waited too long and by the time the antibiotics worked there was some permanent damage. I still have a dull pain from it today, though it can usually ignore it. What a crazy nightmare!!!
12) Master*****, can under certain circumstances help prevent unwanted, embarrassing, guilt causing erec****s. Once again pornography can be involved.
12) Christian brothers tend to marry at a much greater age (average 26) than they used to. Assuming they marry at all, which many of them don’t. Puberty at 12 and first marriage at 26 leaves a huge gap for pornography and sexual thoughts to enter.
13) Christian males are frequently afraid of marriage. They know the divorce rate among church folks is high. I heard one brother say the following. “If you don’t marry you will become a lonely old man. If you do get married you will ultimately become a lonely, broke old man.” These guys are thinking about the ramifications of divorce before they ask a girl out! I even heard talk of Christian Prenuptials!!! One brother said we all have car insurance even though we probably will not wreck the car. If he married he said there was a 50% chance of divorce, so why shouldn’t he get insurance (prenuptial) for that as well since the chances of his marriage failing is higher than wrecking his car. I was speechless!
14) A few Christian males I talked to want to be fathers. Yet they are afraid they may have their children taken from them if a divorce occurs. I have been told by them a false charge of molestation is enough to have their children removed, get them arrested and have them registered as sex offenders for life. I pointed out that Christians don’t tell such lies! To which the reply was Christians are not supposed to get divorced either. Talk about mistrust!!!
15) So many brothers I talked to are either from divorced homes and/or have been divorced themselves. Their views of marriage and commitment are mostly negative.
16) After a lifelong of trying to live holy in the church and having to deal with some or all of the above many males give up on church altogether and sadly become adrift. Anything can happen then.
I hope you all can see why I feel the whole pornography/ Master***** can be complex. Once again. Thank you for your patience!
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 6/6/2009 2:09:55 AM
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yankeedoodled
Posts: 197
Joined: 5/29/2006
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It is easy to fall into temptation, obviously to not fall into temptation refuse to put yourself in a direction that can lead to temptation. Certainly idle hands are the devils workshop. People that keep themselves busy have fall less temptations. Get a hobby at home or socially and find things to do. Lord knows their is far to little workers of/for the harvest and the need desperate in this time.
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 6/8/2009 9:15:12 PM
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RichLP
Posts: 1144
Joined: 5/4/2005
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Posting blind....
OP, have you considered using an internet filter, such as those used for computers in homes w/ children?
By the grace of God and through His strength and wisdom, I have been porn free for a few months now. I got a new computer in late March, and was without a functioning computer for about 1-2 weeks. I dont' remember if I fell to temptation during that period.
But, thanks be to God, because the new computer I'm using as I write has NEVER EVER, NOT EVEN ONCE, visited a porn website and I intend to keep it that way.
Sometimes, I will admit, the temptation does come, but I pray and it goes away. When temptation keeps coming back, I force myself to start playing Christian praises or hymnals which I have stored on my computer. It's kind of difficult to even think about pornography when you hear songs lyrics like "Amazing Love how can it be that You My God would die for me?"
Try it! It should help you. Also read the Bible and pray. It is not easy but it is a battle you CAN win!
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 6/9/2009 10:08:52 AM
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WilliamLangston
Posts: 5
Joined: 6/6/2009
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Hi,sexual feelings are difficult things to control untill you know how.There is a secret that can eliminate most all temptation from your life.Remember when Christ was tempted by the devil.Each time he was tempted he did one thing,He answered the temptation.What this means is each time a temptation presents its self it must be answered or it will continue to tempt us until we give in.But how do we answer it?Always in the negative.When a woman (not your wife) is acting provocitive either by the lack of cloths or by suggestive mannerism, its wrong.Simply try saying to yourself "Its wrong for her to dress like that or act like that, And Its wrong for me to look at her."Then look away. You will find that all sexual desire for her has been removed from you along with all temptation.If a woman has a low cut blouse and her breasts are attracting you that also is wrong,try saying the same thing."she shouldent dress like that and I shouldn't look at her"then look away.This will feel quite strange untill you get used to it.You will become a different person. I know this sounds vary vary old fashion and prudish but it works vary vary well.Christ said to look at a woman and lust after her is the same as adultery.Adultery is a deadly sin.Woman of today want to be looked at an to be lusted after, it makes them feel desireable, and powerful. But to do so poisons the heart and its end is destruction.If a woman propositions you simply say "no" then all temptation will be removed.This method works equaly well with all temptation. If tempted to steal simply say to yourself "thou shall not steal or its wrong to steal" and the temptation will leave you, If you covet after something simply say "no" to what ever you desire and the temptation will leave you.Temptation is basically asking "do you want to?"the answer must be "NO."Temptation unanswered leads to sin.I hope this has helped you.God bless and peace be with you.
< Message edited by WilliamLangston -- 6/9/2009 10:19:01 AM >
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 6/12/2009 10:39:36 AM
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LetGo2God
Posts: 119
Joined: 11/13/2008
Status: offline
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Accountability is key here.I know that I have had to keep the door open whenever I am on the internet, in order to make myself accountable to those in my household.Being accountable to them has helped me stay out of trouble in this area.However, if you live alone you may have to have someone you trust keep you accountable.
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 6/14/2009 10:05:46 AM
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YSM85
Posts: 3
Joined: 6/14/2009
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: thelosttraverler
Hey look, i've been looking for a long time. ive said i would quit many times but i have failed. please what do i do. i nammed myself the lost traveler for a reason. i need the lord but i cant stop my self from looking. i know their is somthing God has for me to do, but because of this pproblom i cant do it. please help me get through this war against saiten, im fighting a lost war on my own...
Thanks
the lost traveler
You know looking at porn is wrong, and you know that it is disrespectful to God and that it disappoints Him. You need to keep that in mind and try harder. It is all up to you. Good luck. I don't think getting rid of your computer, or anything along those lines will make you any stronger because you'd just be avoiding your weakness. In other words, what do you think would be more impressive: a guy who runs away from all temptation and consequently never has to worry about being beaten, or a guy who is confronted by all manner of temptations, but is never swayed by them? A good person should be able to cope with any kind of temptation at any given time.
< Message edited by YSM85 -- 6/14/2009 10:11:54 AM >
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 6/14/2009 10:40:33 AM
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SavedByGraceMD
Posts: 1263
Joined: 2/13/2008
From: the poconos
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quote:
ORIGINAL: YSM85
quote:
ORIGINAL: thelosttraverler
Hey look, i've been looking for a long time. ive said i would quit many times but i have failed. please what do i do. i nammed myself the lost traveler for a reason. i need the lord but i cant stop my self from looking. i know their is somthing God has for me to do, but because of this pproblom i cant do it. please help me get through this war against saiten, im fighting a lost war on my own...
Thanks
the lost traveler
You know looking at porn is wrong, and you know that it is disrespectful to God and that it disappoints Him. You need to keep that in mind and try harder. It is all up to you. Good luck. I don't think getting rid of your computer, or anything along those lines will make you any stronger because you'd just be avoiding your weakness. In other words, what do you think would be more impressive: a guy who runs away from all temptation and consequently never has to worry about being beaten, or a guy who is confronted by all manner of temptations, but is never swayed by them? A good person should be able to cope with any kind of temptation at any given time.
I used to agree with you YSM85. I always thought that I wouldn't be over my sin until I could stand in front of it, and not sin. Know what I mean, but Paul tells us to flee from sexual sin. Like Joseph did
Genesis 39
11 One day he went into the house to attend to his duties, and none of the household servants was inside. 12 She caught him by his cloak and said, "Come to bed with me!" But he left his cloak in her hand and ran out of the house.
1 Corinthians 6
18Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body.
I am coming to the conclusion that trying to stand in the face of this sin, a sin I battle myself, doesn't work. We are not always at our strongest, and at times of emotional, or physical weakness, we are more likely to give in.
Jesus said in
Matthew 26:41 (New King James Version)
41 Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.”
and in
Mark 14:38 (New King James Version)
38 Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.”
Though we may be willing, and our spirit is willing, our flesh is weak.
Personally I have been at battle with this since I got saved. I have spans in time when I am porn free, maybe days, maybe weeks, but never longer than that. Once something happens to upset me, anger me, or get my mind racing into sex land, I turn to porn. Even though I feel the spirit saying no, and my mind says no, my flesh says yes.
I tried settingcaptivesfree.com , but got 2 weeks in and gave up. Went back to it, lasted another week or so, and gave up. I never did one of the things they asked me to do, and I know it was a big part of that program. I am currently reading Every Mans Battle, and The Measure of A Man. I have printed out a study from BeBroken.com. So far, I have struggled, but am not that far into any of the 3. I pray, I read the Word, and I seek God, but my flesh is weak. The only thing I have yet to do is get an accountability partner. I know that I must do this, but have had a hard time opening up about this.
So if anyone has any real advice that works, or is willing to be an accountability partner, IM me.
_____________________________
Isaiah 41:10
"Fear not for I am with you,
Do not be dismayed for I am your God,
I will strengthen you and help you,
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand"
http://followtheleader-mat1624.blogspot.com/
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Be an Overcomer!!!!!!!!!!!!! - 6/15/2009 1:34:54 PM
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Teaching_The_Way
Posts: 48
Joined: 4/18/2006
From: Teaching The Way Ministries
Status: offline
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Hello Friend (I am not a couselor or Pastor) I am just a servant of Jesus Christ
Sexual Immorality (Porn/Lust) is difficult for any man or women to avoid, especially because of all of the immoral TV/music, Advertisement Signs etc.
"IF" you are series about getting help with the (lustful Adultarous/Fornication) problems that you have. Then I will offer my help.
First off I am assuming that you are a Born Again Christian? I do not know if you are an infant in Christ, that has not yet learned the difference between evil and good or a mature Christian in Christ who diffently knows better.
YOU MUST PRAY< PRAY for Strength and Power to Over Come
1) Through the SPirit of Christ you are an ovecomer
2) You Must learn to control your thinking, and think of a womens body as disgusting except for your wifes body (if married)
3) You must dispise all sin and all forms of sin
4) You must love God enough to want to overcome this sin
5) You must worship God in truth and in Spirit
6) You must get rid of anything that temps you into this sin, such as magazines, cable/satlite TV/Music (We have http://www.skyangel.com) clean TV
7) When tempted to look at other women (not your wife) in a lustful way, you MUST look the other way.
8) And especially if you are married, you must not have women as close friend, if that causes you to be tempted to sin
Those are just somethings there my friend,
I use those ideas my self, ANd friend if you are Born Again and Really Love God, it all works well
But if you continue to be addicted to Porn Adultary or and Fornication
Paul says you will not enter heaven friend as it is written;
1 Corinthians 6:9-11
9 Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived.Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals , nor sodomites, 10 nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God.
NKJV
Friend Hopes that Help
_____________________________
http://teachingtheway.org/
If our opinions does not line up with
the scriptures, then our opinions are
dead wrong! Gods words are more important
than our opinions!
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RE: Be an Overcomer!!!!!!!!!!!!! - 6/15/2009 3:57:11 PM
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gzusfrk
Posts: 27
Joined: 5/19/2009
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I also had fell to porn,but no longer,the thing I did was get into the Word,the bible says draw near to God and He will draw nearer to you, I can do all things with Jesus,he that overcomes shall be saved, I guess I or should I say we decided I wanted to be saved.
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 9/8/2009 2:28:33 PM
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hauhau72
Posts: 9
Joined: 9/7/2009
Status: offline
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Not sure if this would work, but don't keep trying to constraint yourself,
whenever you want to watch pornography, GO, but be sure to PRAY BEFORE
you watch it!
Hope it helps:)
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 9/18/2009 12:04:30 PM
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RichLP
Posts: 1144
Joined: 5/4/2005
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I looked at porn yesterday.
Well, sort of.
And after I was done, and went to bed, I prayed to God thanking Him yet again that He has delivered me from pornography, that I no longer have the desire to visit pornographic websites.
A while back, I saw several anti-pornography websites and found one which quoted a famous female porn star's books to compile a list which is being used online by anti-porn activists to prevent women from joining this filthy industry. I will not name the actress and I will not give the URL of the website (if you wish for it please PM me). But this list is eye-opening, and it uses quotes from this book to make the points. Some of the items on the list are:
• Being a pornography performer can often be physically painful.
• The porn industry and the people in it do not treat women with decency, fairness and respect.
• The industry is full of strange and scary people, who are happy to take advantage of you – like “suitcase pimps”.
• You will likely be around a lot of people drinking and taking drugs, with a lot of temptation to succumb yourself.
• Working in porn will negatively affect your viewpoint of men and sex
• Even if you leave the industry, your porn career will haunt you forever.
• It’s extremely difficult to have a healthy personal, romantic or sexual relationship with someone. Your career will likely negatively affect your relationship and your relationship will likely negatively affect your career.
• Since money alone does not lead to true meaningful fulfillment, you likely still won’t be happy, even when you reach the top.
The last two items are even more sobering than the others.
A person who was in the porn industry will be inevitably affected in how he/she sees the opposite sex. How can it not? Rape victims have testified that being raped made it very difficult for them to trust men. Even women who were never raped but had emotionally painful relationships have said they were damaged and that they needed a lot of time to recover before they could trust a man again. Wouldn’t porn be worse than all of this, even more painful than something as horrifying as rape?
And the last one is a damning indictment. It perfectly illustrates humanity’s sinful condition. One may reach fortune, as some in porn (and mainstream actors, musicians, athletes, often do) – and still feel unfulfilled.
The only thing that can fill our hearts is God.
After reading this site, I stumbled upon the testimony of a former porn actress who became a Christian and who now via Youtube and other resources, is laboring to fight pornography. She testified in Washington, D.C., about the horrors of porn, and has helped a few young women leave pornography. One of these young women – a beautiful woman in her late 20s – has a Youtube video in which she explains why she decided to leave pornography. She too is now a believer in Jesus Christ. Another video shows her baptism.
I also found another youtube video of dead porn actors and actresses. Men in their 20s and 30s. Many were very good-looking – and many committed suicide. Drug overdoses, self-induced firearm deaths, leaps from buildings, HIV, etc.
I believe that a man who struggles with porn may find a path to victory if he considers such facts, about how porn can destroy lives. If even non-Christians will be horrified and disgusted at the perversions within the porn industry, how much does this grieve the heart of God?
I did a search for two of the porn actresses who committed suicide and I was led to two discussion forums with formats very much like CrossWalk’s – but they were porn sites. I did see, momentarily, banners with explicit sex acts. I felt temptation at that moment, but by the grace of God, I immediately left those sites.
If we realize how sinful porn is, and how God hates it, it can help us not go to these sites.
I wish I could hate and defeat other sins, such as unforgiveness and unbridled anger, as I have pornography. All sin is sin. But pornography is especially powerful against men.
Remember, brothers, porn is evil. It’s destructive, it’s a rapacious, cruel, heartless, and exploitative industry which generates billions of dollars by preying upon young women, many of whom come from broken families, histories of sexual abuse, as well as drug and alcohol abuse. It makes us men look at men like objects; it twists and perverts our idea of and understanding of heterosexual sex. It objectifies, humiliates, degrades, and corrupts women.
Let’s remember that God’s design for sex is nothing like pornography, and that by His grace, His power, and His love, we CAN be porn-free. We CAN love our women with purity, chastity, respect, and godliness. We CAN abstain from comparing our sisters and even non-Christian women in our lives to the fictitious characters of porn.
Let’s all pray for us men in the body of Christ to defeat porn permanently. I sometimes wondered if it would ever happen for me. Lots of prayer and more involvement in church, and a concerted effort to read the Bible at home every day and to pray before and after helped.
Let’s all do it. To glorify our God and to honor women, and to respect our bodies and minds, and to respect the Holy Spirit Who lives in us.
< Message edited by RichLP -- 9/18/2009 12:10:58 PM >
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 9/28/2009 11:01:34 PM
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Raptorman
Posts: 26
Joined: 9/21/2005
From: Colorado
Status: offline
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I'm so glad this discussion is still going on. Even people who posted here and pray with our brothers in Christ online will still find themselves struggling and stumbling (myself included, I am ashamed to admit). But in my case, having someone pray over you and keep you accountable (even if it's only through email) will go a long way. Please point it out if this has been recommended before, but I for one would suggest getting a hobby. Fishing, shooting clay pigeons, drawing, writing, whittling with a pocket knife, throwing ninja stars, driving a monster truck -- whatever it is, whatever interests you, take it up as a project to use your time. Having a lot of spare time on your hands will make you more vulnerable to temptation to dabble in porn. I have very recently made some significant steps in my journey to get rid of this virus, but I still have a ways to go. I'd be honored to pray for you, and with any specific people, if you PM me.
Kindest regards,
John
_____________________________
"Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese." - G.K. Chesterton
"If we valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world." - J.R.R. Tolkien
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 10/18/2009 9:08:27 PM
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Gigem08
Posts: 138
Joined: 10/9/2006
Status: offline
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covenanteyes.com
It is a software program/service that can be downloaded from their website. It costs $7.99 a month and it is a filter/tracking software that sends your entire URL history to a friend of your choosing. I'm not sure if the friend has to have his/her own account or not; my accountability partner does. For PC's it has a filter and tracker but for Mac's it only has the tracker. This measure alone has been enough for me by the grace of God to quit internet porn entirely for the last 3 mths or so.
_____________________________
Jonathan S. Wilder
I only ask that you be real...
(Me)
(Please call me Jonathan, THANKS!)
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 11/10/2009 9:41:11 PM
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Microbio
Posts: 10
Joined: 11/10/2009
Status: offline
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May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer. Psalm 19:14
I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge--that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Ephesians 3: 16-19
Fight your sin...for everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world? Only he who believes that Jesus is the Son of God. 1 John 5:4-5
Those who obey his commands live in him, and he in them. And this is how we know that he lives in us: We know it by the Spirit he gave us.
Many people, when they hear an expression in the Bible like, "Abide in Christ," do not readily understand what it means. If a person abides in his house, he stays there. If one abides by the decision of the judge, he obeys the judge. In John 15:7, the phrase would mean to "remain stable" or "fixed in one�s state."
In John 15:7, Jesus is saying, if we live as He does by keeping His words, then our prayers will certainly be answered. If we say we abide in Him, we also ought to live in the same manner as Jesus lived or walked (1 John 2:6). Jesus was constantly doing things that were pleasing in the Father�s sight (John 8:29). When we live this Way, we are assured of having our prayers answered (1 John 3:22).
Living to please the Father daily is easy and pleasant (Matt. 11:30). It does not take a great deal of intelligence, but we must have the attitude of a child to live God�s Way of life (Matt. 18:4; Mark 10:15; Luke 18:17; 1 Cor. 1:26-28).
God-fearing parents would train their children not to swear, lie, steal or cheat. Instead, they would train their children to get involved in doing good things and to continue to do good, overcoming evil by doing good. God wants the same (Rom. 12:21). Our heavenly Father wants us to do the same so He can bless us instead of send curses on us daily (Heb. 12:5-11; Acts 3:26).
We are, by nature, children of wrath (Eph. 2:3). But we come out from under the wrath of God when we become obedient to Christ (John 3:36). Unless we are abiding in Christ daily by practicing righteousness for God, we are all being held captive to do Satan�s will (2 Tim. 2:26). If we are not abiding in Christ, we are doing Satan�s will. But if we are overcoming evil by doing God�s Will daily on earth as it is constantly being done in heaven, we are abiding in Christ (Matt. 6:10). Doing God�s Will is doing good works and this is how we abide in Christ (John 9:31; 1 John 2:17).
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 11/10/2009 9:45:41 PM
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Microbio
Posts: 10
Joined: 11/10/2009
Status: offline
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A disciple of Jesus Christ, after baptism, is to live to the Spirit in order to please God. How is this done?
Before you became a disciple of Jesus Christ, you were by nature living to the flesh. That means that you were thinking your own thoughts and saying your own words. You were directing your own steps and living the way you thought was best.
Now you have agreed to live your life to please God, like our example Jesus Christ did. Living to the Spirit is living to please the Father, who gives His Spirit to those who obey Him (Acts 5:32). What does the Father want us to do in order to live to the Spirit? He wants us to glorify Him by doing good works (Eph. 2:10; Matt. 5:16).
Why is doing good works so important? Doing good works is how we produce good fruits on our spiritual trees, and how we build godly character (Matt. 3:10). The Father does good works, and we are to imitate Him (Eph. 5:1; 1 Cor. 11:1; 1 John 2:6; 3 John 11; 1 Peter 2:21). Doing good works allows a disciple of Christ to be blessed (Mal. 3:10). Good works was the main ingredient in the process by which Jesus overcame, and Jesus said many of those who followed Him would do greater good works than He did (John 14:12). Doing good works is how we overcome evil and how we learn to be servants of others for the glory of God. Doing good works is how we discipline ourselves for the purpose of godliness (1 Tim. 4:7). Doing the works that Jesus Christ did is how we overcome and how we receive a new heart (Rev. 2:26).
When we overcome our old nature, we enter the kingdom of God or God�s rest (Heb. 4:10; Rev. 3:21). Then our joy is made full and we have an abundant life (John 10:10). When all we sow is righteousness, like Christ our example, then all we reap is blessings. Then we are truly living to the Spirit.
Many people believe we live this way naturally after accepting Jesus Christ as our personal Savior. Scripture shows clearly that this is a false conception. Look at the world. It is a mess! Most people who claim to be Christians are practicing a faith without good works. As a result, they remain spiritually dead in their faith (James 2:14-26). They are becoming religious, but not holy; and without holiness, no one will see the Lord (Heb. 12:14, King James Version). We cannot possibly be holy without obeying and practicing the words of Jesus Christ each day (John 8:51; Luke 6:46). This takes godly discipline, but just remember, it is easy and pleasant (Matt. 11:30). It is wonderful. Try it! You will love it and the Lord will love you too.
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 11/10/2009 9:51:05 PM
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Microbio
Posts: 10
Joined: 11/10/2009
Status: offline
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When the word of God says, "Be perfect," it means exactly what it says (Matt. 5:48; James 1:4; Heb. 12:23). But how can we be perfect? First of all, let�s realize that Jesus Christ was perfect, as His heavenly Father is perfect. He did the Father�s Will instead of His own (John 6:38). That is what made Him perfect. He kept the Father�s sayings and He lived exactly as He saw the Father live. Anyone who lives as God lives will suffer persecution, so Christ suffered persecution (2 Tim. 3:12).
The Bible commands, "Discipline yourself for the purpose of godliness" (1 Tim. 4:7). How do you do that? Keep God�s Ways and do God�s Will on earth as it is done in heaven (Matt. 6:10). Psalm 145:17 says, "The Lord is righteous in all His Ways, and kind in all His deeds." Then, it stands to reason that a disciple of Jesus Christ should strive to be righteous in all his ways and kind in all his deeds.
If you know Jesus Christ was righteous, you know that everyone who practices righteousness is truly born of Him (1 John 2:29). And this is the key! When you practice righteousness, you are righteous in God�s eyes (1 John 3:7). You have begun the godly process that allows God the Father to make you perfect (Heb. 12:23).
By doing good deeds for God, you are practicing the truth that is according to godliness (Titus 3:8; 1:1; John 3:21). You have nothing to worry about now because you are a doer of the word as well as a servant of God (James 1:22; 1 Peter 3:13).
Very few people know that the word "perfect" used in Matthew 5:48 and Philippians 3:15 means "spiritually mature." Spiritually mature disciples do not practice sin in their lives. Instead, they overcome sin and its temptations by continually doing good for God.
No one who is truly born of God practices sin any longer in his life; and because he is born of God and God�s Spirit (seed) abides in him, he cannot sin (1 John 3:9). Those who belong to Jesus Christ have crucified the flesh with its evil practices and desires (Gal. 5:24). With the help of God�s Spirit, they put to death the things in their lives that are not pleasing to God (Rom. 8:13).
Now, they walk in the Spirit and no longer carry out the evil passions they once had (Gal. 5:16). Jesus crushed Satan�s nature in them, with their help, and now they are new creations with His nature formed in them (Rom. 16:20; Gal. 4:19; 6:15). They are now perfect or complete (2 Cor. 13:9, 11). They are spiritually mature. They are truly born again and the evil one does not touch them (1 John 5:18). They have overcome the evil one (1 John 2:13-14). They are perfect because God has perfected them.
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RE: how do i stop looking at porn PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!! - 11/10/2009 9:58:23 PM
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Microbio
Posts: 10
Joined: 11/10/2009
Status: offline
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Watch this video. If My Words Abide in You - John Piper
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FOkLP6VHtWk
< Message edited by Microbio -- 11/10/2009 10:05:02 PM >
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