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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 3/23/2009 11:53:35 AM
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yeahright352
Posts: 15
Joined: 3/16/2009
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yeah i don't think dr dobson's single person's "license" to masturbate is a good idea also, you make some really good points, i have fell in the past because i was prideful and actually looked in my history folder to see how long it was, since i last saw porn! i looked at the date, felt real good, i don't know why it wasn't by my power right? so why should i feel good? stupid right! well before i knew it i was challenging myself to see if i could see this porn , and like a dog goes back to his vomit i was into it for about a week, now i don't go back looking in my history folder, but i'll still be getting safe eyes filter for sure., i don't count the days, i take it one day at a time, let God get all the glory for what he is doing, here in this message board and in other places on the net.
quote:
ORIGINAL: tylakeland
It is important, not to let ourselves have that feeling that because we're singlee we can pleasure ourselves sexually. We all know that masturbation is usually coupled with fantasy, pornography and laziness and most of all self sensuality. All of which are not christian behavior. Its tough, if we keep focused on how long we have been without pornaography and masturbation we are still focusing on sin and temptation. Anytime our minds are meditating on what we are temoted to do are what we haven't been tempted to do lately, we are still on dangrerous ground.
With Jesus as our main focus we can have a heart of clarity and cleanliness. We want to be focused on what we can do for God to please Him. We can have a daily renewal IF we truly desire it. Men do have natural urges to look at female nudity and pleasure themselves physically but we dont HAVE to give in. There are other things that need to be done, things that wont keep us involved in a funk of sin.
I totally agree with you. I understand Dobsons idea, but definately do not agree. Masturbation may start off innocent, but it leads down a road of distruction and can kill a mans sexual innocense and deaden him to real sexual intimacy with a female. Masturbation also gets a man focused even more on himself. Masturbation is selfish and uneeded. its hard to stop but with patience and a deeper commitment topleasing Jesus, it can be done. Hang in there fellas!
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 3/26/2009 10:51:37 PM
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yeahright352
Posts: 15
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i have a victory report
i prayed before having relations with wife
and i didn't think of another woman during that time
big victory for me from Jesus!
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 3/26/2009 11:59:15 PM
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tylakeland
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Thats very good to see. Praise the Lord!
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 3/28/2009 7:04:51 PM
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yeahright352
Posts: 15
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man, every day i get those dreams, and even right now i am getting these thoughts like to see porn, i need Jesus ! and a good filter on this computer!
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/9/2009 2:10:12 AM
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yeahright352
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i guess it's needless to say that i still have trouble with this, but i am going through onto victory!
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/14/2009 4:17:00 AM
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yeahright352
Posts: 15
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ok
i have fell
but i got back up right!
i have started to work again
and will be starting ministry when the dust settles on this new job, i think it's important to do only one important thing in your life at a time, and for me it is depending on Jesus to give me the victory
i know the true lasting victory is in Jesus!
and only through being sensitive to the Spirits leading will i be able to defeat this thing
and my past failure is because i wanted to fall!
hey i like it
what can i say!
paul said it best the bad that i shouldn't do
this i do!
and i think paul was not only talking in the present tense here
but paul was human like us right?
he sinned and all the rest also
sin is sin
be it masturbation or adultery or watching porn or overeating or gambling
well i'm not too sure about gambling!
just kidding ok!
it's only gambling when you lose right? lol
i have done soe strange things lately to keep away from temptation and to overcome it
the bible says God will give us the escape
if i cry out to Jesus when i am tempted
then he must
that is right
he must give us a way to escape right
God is not a man that he should lie
well i just thought i'd come here and let you guys know how the soap opera [my life] is going! lol
if i stay free for a couple of years i'll reveal my name and let you guys see me perform on youtube
but that will take some time right
when i went to teen challenge back in 80' to 82' they used to say it takes 5 years for a person to really break a habit!
2014 come soon!
hold it wasn't 2012 the end of the world? lol
blessings all
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/19/2009 2:01:26 PM
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318
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I don't know if anyone has already pointed this our or not but--
I couldn't help but be amused that the "Women Only: Personal Issues" section has not so much as one thread devoted to this topic.
I guess that means that only males do it, eh? Either that, or else only males see it as an issue 
_____________________________
Brian
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/19/2009 4:00:54 PM
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Johnny_
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Oh my goodness, it took me so many years to get over this ridiculous struggle. I don't know how many years because I stopped counting. But it is so refreshing when you are no longer addicted to masturbation or have to constantly think about doing it. Yes there was a point in my life when I nearly succumbed to masturbation. I once thought it was impossible to stop but I was wrong, it is possible. This was one of the my biggest challenges but I am so thrilled now that's it over. Victory is the Lord's!
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/22/2009 5:20:59 AM
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doobie
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Jonny, hearing what you've written gives people like me hope! I seem to do well for a few weeks, perhaps a month or two and then have another few weeks where I give in completely and end up masturbating to porn over the net. It is quite a predictable cycle. I've just come out of another low point where I fell 3 times in 4 days as above. I do have a real sense of God's love for me regardless of what I do but as usual I'm wrapped in guilt and shame too. It is good to know that some people have conquered this and encourages me to know that it can be beaten. I am repentant as usual and, once again, asking for God's forgiveness and his power to change my weak will --doobie
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/22/2009 6:43:20 AM
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DaveW
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Johnny_
Oh my goodness, it took me so many years to get over this ridiculous struggle. I don't know how many years because I stopped counting. But it is so refreshing when you are no longer addicted to masturbation or have to constantly think about doing it. I do not want to rain on your parade or denigrate the Lord's grace, but could it be that what you are experiencing is a normal age related lower level of testosterone? It is a medical fact that if the T levels are lowered it lowers the sex drive as well, making it easier to avoid having to relieve your drive.
_____________________________
Avatar is my daughter Laura and SIL David on their wedding 9/20/09 ====================================
Our CD is now available here:
http://cdbaby.com/cd/dswaggoner
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/23/2009 1:46:54 AM
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Williamtell
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It has been my personal experience, through way too many failures, that masterbation is as much the habit of as it is about the release of. The documentation I've studied appears to support this as well. I spoke in an earlier blog entry about the power of God toward overcoming as well as what masterbation leads to in terms of alienation with a spouse and more importantly what it teaches us about trust and dependancy. And where our dependancy needs to be.
I always find myself wondering about a response that seeks to justify what I want to do, rather than being intentional about turning away from something I want to do that dishonors God. Although I'm certain that I'm not aroused as readily or as strongly as I was when I was seventeen, years of masterbation developed a habit of self-satisfaction that is just as strong or stronger than the urges I experienced at seventeen.
Johnny, I encourage you to be careful about considering your victory to be a done deal. Many times God takes away sinful desires completely and immediately, but many times it's our 'thorn in the flesh'. Remember, Paul said "I die daily to self...". I'm not questioning your victory, just softly admonishing against allowing pride into the equation.
I've proven over and over that anything can become an addiction: food, TV, movies, porn, sex, drugs; the list goes on and on. Remember, brothers, that most of the time addictions are not considered to be vanquished, just controlled and acknowledged (alcoholics anonymous) and God may decide to teach you something important from your addiction.
His grace knows no bounds!
Be Blessed!
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/29/2009 9:47:22 PM
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yeahright352
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i can certainly relate to that, yes it is a vicious cycle! i know it robs me of my time, it is sin, yet i do it! and then the guilt and shame, i don't understand why God has done away with me! his patience is beyond comprehesion
quote:
ORIGINAL: doobie
Jonny, hearing what you've written gives people like me hope! I seem to do well for a few weeks, perhaps a month or two and then have another few weeks where I give in completely and end up masturbating to porn over the net. It is quite a predictable cycle. I've just come out of another low point where I fell 3 times in 4 days as above. I do have a real sense of God's love for me regardless of what I do but as usual I'm wrapped in guilt and shame too. It is good to know that some people have conquered this and encourages me to know that it can be beaten. I am repentant as usual and, once again, asking for God's forgiveness and his power to change my weak will --doobie
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/30/2009 6:32:41 AM
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sunofone
Posts: 485
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This is an interesting topic,I thought about it for a while before even deciding to post.just my confession,than my thoughts.I don't believe that masturbation is in and of itself sinful.I even on occasion masturbate,sometimes alone other times with or for my wife.
My wife and I talk about the issue openly.Here is an issue I can tell you from real experience.
I got saved before the horomones started kicking it.I was eleven years old.After being saved for some time,I had no idea what masturbation was until I heard older friends talking about it,and I watched some movie that showed a guy indirectly masturbating.
Now I knew sex before marriage was off,yet I began feeling sexually aroused,not at eleven but sometime shortly after that.
So imagine my dilemna,I want to be holy and not fornicate,but I have these erections with no place to take it.My first practice was to simply ignore it.
This is how that worked out for me.I would on occasion wake up with this sticky goo all over where I had what is commonly known as a wet dream.
I'd wake up not only disgusted but mortified,feeling like I failed God in my sleep.It wasn't long after this,that I figured out that sexual energy was very similar to physical energy.
It was after this point that I allowed myself to masturbate,initially I felt good,both physicially and mentally.After a while of letting the desire control me I felt guilty and condemned.
In order to keep doing it without condemnation,I told myself that it was better than fornication.
Now some thirty years later and having been married for seven years,having a sexually fulfilling marriage,loving my wife,not ever having physically cheating on her but in my mind different story.
I still find my self masturbating on occasion,sometime early in the morning because I want to do it but she's asleep and I don't want to wake her.She's told me to wake her when this happens,but I tried this a few times and it hasn't always worked out for the best.
I find that it's much simpler to just do it,the nergy is released,she gets a full nights rest for work the next morning,and I'm not walking around with this energy over my head all day.
There are other times when I want to masturbate,and not have sex.I just want the sexual release,no offense to my wife.I want to be gone and done in sixty seconds and be on with my day.
I have on occasion used my Wife for the vehichle to release this as well,not a good thing.I end up feeling guilty for using her as a masturbation tool,and she feels hurt and used because she knows that that was all about me and she was just the vehichle to get me there.
So if I want to masturbate,I do it.It doesn't have control over me,it's not daily or even weekly,although sometimes it is.It's simply seasonal.It comes and goes .
I have sex far more than I masturbate,and if I feel the urge to masturbate strongly,I increase my sexual activity.I channel it for our mutual benefit.This makes the sex off the chains.
Yet there are still those times when I just want to be gone in sixty seconds and keep moving.
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/1/2009 9:02:41 AM
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yeahright352
Posts: 15
Joined: 3/16/2009
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i have been doing searches for lust and other topics this is what i have found
up to here
Numbers 15:39
You will have these tassels to look at and so you will remember all the commands of the LORD, that you may obey them and not prostitute yourselves by going after the lusts of your own hearts and eyes.
Numbers 15:38-40 (in Context) Numbers 15 (Whole Chapter)
Job 31:1
"I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl.
Job 31:1-3 (in Context) Job 31 (Whole Chapter)
Proverbs 6:25
Do not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes,
Proverbs 6:24-26 (in Context) Proverbs 6 (Whole Chapter)
Isaiah 57:5
You burn with lust among the oaks and under every spreading tree; you sacrifice your children in the ravines and under the overhanging crags.
Isaiah 57:4-6 (in Context) Isaiah 57 (Whole Chapter)
Jeremiah 5:8
They are well-fed, lusty stallions, each neighing for another man's wife.
Jeremiah 5:7-9 (in Context) Jeremiah 5 (Whole Chapter)
Jeremiah 13:27
your adulteries and lustful neighings, your shameless prostitution! I have seen your detestable acts on the hills and in the fields. Woe to you, O Jerusalem! How long will you be unclean?"
Jeremiah 13:26-27 (in Context) Jeremiah 13 (Whole Chapter)
Lamentations 4:1
How the gold has lost its luster, the fine gold become dull! The sacred gems are scattered at the head of every street.
Lamentations 4:1-3 (in Context) Lamentations 4 (Whole Chapter)
up to here
Ezekiel 6:9
Then in the nations where they have been carried captive, those who escape will remember me—how I have been grieved by their adulterous hearts, which have turned away from me, and by their eyes, which have lusted after their idols. They will loathe themselves for the evil they have done and for all their detestable practices.
Ezekiel 6:8-10 (in Context) Ezekiel 6 (Whole Chapter)
Ezekiel 16:26
You engaged in prostitution with the Egyptians, your lustful neighbors, and provoked me to anger with your increasing promiscuity.
Ezekiel 16:25-27 (in Context) Ezekiel 16 (Whole Chapter)
Ezekiel 20:24
because they had not obeyed my laws but had rejected my decrees and desecrated my Sabbaths, and their eyes lusted after their fathers' idols.
Ezekiel 20:23-25 (in Context) Ezekiel 20 (Whole Chapter)
More results from New International Version
Results from Gospel.comGospel.com Topics
lust
light
sexual lust
pornography and lust
lost
Gospel.com Blog Posts
Miracle on the Hudson
Map of Global Evangelism
Winning the battle but losing the war with your kids?
More results from Gospel.com
Topical index results9 Results
LUST
CUPIDITY » See LUST
LASCIVIOUSNESS » See LUST
DESIRE » EVIL » See LUST
FURNACE » FIGURATIVE » Of lust (Hosea 7:4)
INSTABILITY » INSTANCES OF » David, in yielding to lust (2 Samuel 11:2-9)
PRAYER » MISCELLANY OF MINOR SUB-TOPICS » The Israelites lusted for the fleshpots of Egypt; the answer gave them, flesh, but also leanness of soul (Psalms 106:14,15)
WOMEN » INSTANCES OF » The daughters of Lot, in their incestuous lust (Genesis 19:31-38)
WOMEN » INSTANCES OF » Potiphar's wife, in her lascivious lust and slander against Joseph (Genesis 39:7-20)
my thoughts on these verses are as follows
up to here
my thoughts on lusts
numbers 15:39 i think God wants us to divert our eyes to something else!
i have read it like 3 times, i'll check the commentary also in a bit, but what i get out of this , is that you have a physical reminder on your person , and you can see it on others as well if they have these tassels on
15:37- 15:41
exactly what these things means toward temptation , or escaping it other than diverting one eyes is a mystery a bit, a tassle will draw attention, i have seen them in hats also, like matador hats i guess it woud be very visable that way for sure! even if nobody wore it like that we could always see it on , and remember the Lord our God!
one day at a time ok!
Job 31:1-3 nkjv
I have made a covenant with my
eyes, Why should I look upon a
young woman?
for what is the allotment of God
from above,
And the inheritance of the
Almighty from on high?
3. Is it not destruction for the
wicked
And disaster for the workers of
iniquities?
4. Does he not see my ways, And
count all my steps
job 31:1 making an agreement with his eyes not to look lustfully at a girl
i guess is self explainitory, but lets check it out.
proverbs 6:25 we need to read up on that
proverbs 5:1 - 5:23 , 6:20 - 7:5
ish 57:5?
Jeremiah 5:8 wow! stallions!
yes, it is like an animal, with no control, like a car or ship that has lost control of the steering
Jeremiah 13:27 yes, do we really understand that God sees us?
Lamentations 4:1 this act of self gratification makes your gold lose it's luster!
up to here
Ezekiel 6:9 which have lusted after their idols
Ezekiel 16:26
Ezekiel 20:24 eyes lusted after their fathers' idols
lot's wife lusted after sodom it costed her , her life
lot's daughters in their incestuous lust (Genesis 19:31-38)
David, in yielding to lust (2 Samuel 11:2-9)
samson
judah
revelation talks about it much
The Israelites lusted for the fleshpots of Egypt; the answer gave them, flesh, but also leanness of soul (Psalms 106:14,15)
Potiphar's wife, in her lascivious lust and slander against Joseph (Genesis 39:7-20)
i will continue to do this everytime i am temptted and see what happens
or when i am very tired which is when i am weakest
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/1/2009 10:40:16 AM
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Bro_Shane
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If you are married and the only person you imagine to, um, complete the task is your wife then there can be no sin. You can't lust after your wife and you can't commit adultery with her. Think of someone else and you have sinned. If you are not married then you sin through lust, you commit fornication (and possibly adultery), and open yourself up to temptations you may not try too hard to fight.
That's the way I see it. I can find no scripture against it specifically, only the results of it.
_____________________________
<---- Respect the turtle neck
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/2/2009 6:50:19 AM
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sunofone
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Along the point of what Bro.Shane said.Let's just be real and frank here.Masturbation normallly starts before physical sexual activity does.Matter of fact young children,both male and female masturbate without a knowledge or sexual gratification in mind when they do so.
It's just normal basic,physiology. There is a separate issue of lust, pornography, sexual deviance, etc...
I'm not talking about deviant behavior here, I'm talking simple physiology and normal sexual activity between a married couple in my particular case. Whether married or single, any issue can become harmful or sinful.Alcohol being one that jumps out at me, heck even sex can be addictive.
I believe when Paul says that it is better to marry than to burn,we can all agree that normal sexual lust was the burn he was describing. It's normal to want to have sex.
For most masturbation is either a supplement, or a replacement for a legitimate desire/need.
If you're married and your wife becomes physically or mentally unable/unwilling to have sex with you, what are you to do? Would masturbating be wrong in this case?
I think in this case, it goes back to what Shane said, what's driving the desire? Who is the object of your desire.
I believe we have several different topics combined in this one basic yet complex issue.
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/3/2009 2:33:06 AM
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tylakeland
Posts: 19
Joined: 11/14/2008
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Its tough, whatever your experience has been. I started when I was eleven, and was hooked. But its because I fed the beast. That beast that craves sexual things, touch, messing around with girls, sensuality, orgasm. SIN! We feed that beast everytime we give in. But even before that opportunity comes, most of us set ourselves up for falling. Are we watching sexual things on tv. Did we watch an r-rated movie with a hot sex scene that just stays in our mind? Porn. Even a conversation with the buddies about sex stuff can fuel the fire.
Sometimes a guy just wants a good jerk off. Whether its after a day at work or if your wife isnt in the mood, and you dont want to bother her. Some times its just easier to help yourself to a good 1 on 1. But feeding that beast will never grow your self controll, which is one of the fruits of the Spirit.
We are called as men of God to be led by the Holy Spirit. Does a Spirit driven man masturbate? We all know the answer to that question. So the real issue is...what is fueling you? Obviously when a man is looking at porn, or masturbating he is not being led by the Holy Spirit, in fact he is giving in to a desire that is sinful. Adn the Bible tells us that sin leads to death.
I have faught this for two years, and breaking a habit that has been a tradition for 17 years is tough. After work I would masturbate, after a workout I would treat myself to a jerk. Before getting out of bed I would wake up to a jerk. This behavior formed a pattern of self pleasure and effects my self control.
If I'm honest I can see a direct coralation between my time spent worshiping, studying and learning of God and my masturbation issues. When I am worshiping (serving God, and praising Him for just being my creator) Im not in the mood to masturbate. When im studying the word, it is tough to ignore a morning erection and study, but it is possible, and after about 10 minuets of getting into the word it becomes easier.
Its really important for us to not give ourselves permission to sin. I know what happens. We go a week without it and now we have blueballs, and we say "well, I'll just relieve the tension and thats all." But then you start the cycle again. What if I used that theory with crack? "We'll I REALLY need it now, just this once." FAILURE. We cant live in victory and keep pleasuring ourselves. Its impossible.
Self-pleasuring feels great, we all know that. We are great at pleasing ourselves, that what our body wants. But there comes a time in life where enough has to be enough. Jesus death on the cross shows us that the penalty for sin was serious. Just think of your guardian angel in your home, the angel that is to protect you and you're just wanking away! How heaven must shutter at the amount of CHristian men who are just fine with this act! Do we really want to have our penises is our hands when Jesus comes? Some will.
The answer seems to be so hard, but it really isnt. Victory is ours! Some of us doubt that we can ever truely live without ever masturbating again. And I think it is those who believe this way that will fail. Think about it. I love chocolate alot, but I dont eat it 3 times a week. I like meat, but Im vegetarian. So if I can go without things I love, why cant I not masturbate as well?
I've said this before, we dont HAVE to pleasure ourselves, we CHOOSE to. Because deep inside we want that feeling. We love the feeling of our bodies writhing in pleasure untill we orgasm. Many men are so afraid to admit the fact that this is a sin they LOVE. Well, I'll start the train..."Masturbation feels wonderful!" We have to be honest first about the fact that we love this sin. And when when you realize the fact that you LOVE a certain sin, that should scare the Hell out of you! But can we love God more?
Do you love God enough to tap into His gift of the Holy Spirit to use the self-controll He freely gives? Do you want to please God in your body? If you do, you can. Make a decision to not masturbate. Is it THAT easy? YES! You WILL be tempted, your penis will throw a tantrum, your mind will as well. But remember, you dont HAVE to sin. And thats what it is. God gave us the victory through Jesus sacrifice on the cross. We can be free of this perverted habit that holds alot of men in the church. Yes, its not murder, but it kills intimacy. yes its not adultry, but it steals pleasure time that your wife should be giving you.
Please choose to curb your appitite for pleasure and stop feeding the desire to masturbate. Choose entertainment that wont fuel the fire. Dont listen to those shock jocks on the radio that disrespect the marriage bed. Spend genuine time getting to know God and CHOOSE to not masturbate. Your penis will not die if you dont rub it. Let the Spirit grow self controll inside of you. If you are only praying once a day multiply it by 5. You need to be on Gods case, begging Him to help you. And you need to hear yourself asking Him to give you the victory. Excercise the faith that God gives you and believe that you will have the victory and that you wont mastubate anymore. It wont be easy, but you can do it, because Jesus is on your side. Say I can and I will be free of this perverted habit. And by Gods grace you will win.
< Message edited by tylakeland -- 5/3/2009 2:46:21 AM >
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/3/2009 7:48:57 AM
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sunofone
Posts: 485
Joined: 10/11/2007
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Your post was a tad bit to long to repost, so I'll just summarize my thoughts on it. I think there is such a thing as going off on the deep end here. Sex is great!! God designed it to be that way!! Watching pornography or any deviant sexual behavior is not only sinful, but is also harmful.
The problem with discussing masturbation among Christians is that we all want to be spiritual, which is great. If we're all honest and downright real masturbating is simply natural.
Sex is natural as well. It's not a sin to have sex, neither is it a sin to masturbate. It's all in what motivates you to do either that involves sin. Sex is great as long as it's between a man and a woman of consenting age and are married, any thing less is sinful behavior.
Masturbation is fine as long as the object of your affection is your Wife, anything less is sinful, because it involves unchecked lust.
The problem with masturbation is that it's our first sexual encounter, and it's totally private. It happens before we engage physically, and it's altogether pleasurable.
I really don't know if it's possible or healthy to get pre-adolescents to not masturbate. In a perfect world boys would marry when puberty hits and would therefore never need to masturbate; however we know I truly jest.
I honestly don't see where masturbation is any worse than having a beer, a cigarette, a piece of chocolate etc.. We are allowed to enjoy ourselves are we not?
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/3/2009 6:17:45 PM
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tylakeland
Posts: 19
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I think I get what you're saying, but the problem comes in later. Like you said, sex is fine, its great, God made it that way. It was meant for two married people, a man and a woman. If that man is having a solo session, he is not being united with his wife.
Also, anything that draws us away from the Lord should be considered dangerous. I think its safe to say that when we masturbate, we are not glorifying God. We are just having a good time. And just ask most of the men here, masturbation is addictive. Very Addictive. And has baggage. Most men msturbate to porn or fantasy, whcih are inapproriate and some are horendously perverted.
Yes, children do masturbate without knowing it, but then something happens, they either grow out of it, or they never stop. It almost a self abuse. To always have to rub yourself when something is going good, or bad, or stressful, this is not accpetable behavior.
As far as the adolecent NEEDING to masturbate, we know wthats not true. We have nocturnal emissions. But what happens is that most boys get so used to masturbating that they dont have nocturnal emissions. Their bodies dont get to make a habit out of functionaing normally, so the body comforms to the habit. So at the time where tha body would rid itslef naturally of the semen, the boy or man, just does it maually. Because of habit.
I understand that something that seems so normal and that is so widespread can seem okay, but look deeper, look at your mind when are mastubating, look at what going on around you. What got you in the mood? What are you dwelling on? If you're honest you know its not Holy.
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/3/2009 6:50:32 PM
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Bro_Shane
Posts: 1614
Joined: 8/4/2005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: tylakeland
I think I get what you're saying, but the problem comes in later. Like you said, sex is fine, its great, God made it that way. It was meant for two married people, a man and a woman. If that man is having a solo session, he is not being united with his wife.
Please point me to any scripture that says it is wrong. You have a lot of spiritual ideas and words in your post but, when it comes down to it, there's nothing there of substance.
If a man desires his wife and this desire fuels the big M, and no other woman enters his mind, what sin has he committed? I'm not talking about a person who suffers from a compulsion or emotional disorder, just some guy that loves and desires his wife. Where is his sin?
quote:
Also, anything that draws us away from the Lord should be considered dangerous. I think its safe to say that when we masturbate, we are not glorifying God. We are just having a good time. And just ask most of the men here, masturbation is addictive. Very Addictive. And has baggage. Most men msturbate to porn or fantasy, whcih are inapproriate and some are horendously perverted.
How do you drive your car for the glory of God? How do you make your coffee for the glory of God? When you shave, are you glorifying God? How about when eating potato chips? This argument is tired and pointless.
If there is no porn, adultery, deviance, etc., just a man thinking of his wife, where is the sin? Scripture please.
quote:
Yes, children do masturbate without knowing it, but then something happens, they either grow out of it, or they never stop. It almost a self abuse. To always have to rub yourself when something is going good, or bad, or stressful, this is not accpetable behavior.
I agree with you here.
quote:
I understand that something that seems so normal and that is so widespread can seem okay, but look deeper, look at your mind when are mastubating, look at what going on around you. What got you in the mood? What are you dwelling on? If you're honest you know its not Holy.
This is a sweeping generalization. There is no way you can be in the mind and heart of every man to know this. I am sure what you are saying is true for many men, I don't dispute the negative effects of porn and the like. However, to lump decent men with no unfaithfulness or deviance of any kind, in with them is to entirely miss the point.
I am ready to be proven wrong. I am ready for anyone to show me a body of teaching, rightly interpreted and in context, that shows sin in a married man that thinks of no one but his wife, and is not going solo to the point it is intruding on his relationship with her or with the Lord.
_____________________________
<---- Respect the turtle neck
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/3/2009 8:03:17 PM
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tylakeland
Posts: 19
Joined: 11/14/2008
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Thanks for your response.
I know its tough to try to explain anything about masturbation from the Bible. But there are other things i.e. spousal abuse, that are not explained in the bible. No im not equating masturbation and spousal abuse, just saying that its not mentioned, like many other things.
Many christian men i have talked to do not see a problem with an occasional masturbatory episode everyonce in a while. Some are involved with their wives. Others do it when they are away on business or when their wives are not sexually available.
I guess I have questions. Like, If you are not looking at porn, fantasizing, or just plain horny. Why would you feel the need to masturbate? Morning wood, most of them go away after we pee. So when else would I masturbate unless I was aroused. My other question comes from the fact that unless a husband and wife are involved in this act together. How does it form intimacy? If I go and masturbate when my wife is sleeping next to me, how does that make us closer?
As far as thinking about my wife? Fantasising to me is dangerous, becuase it creates a ficticious world that does not exist where my wife does things that maybe she normally does not do. Mayber her body looks a little different on occasions. But this mental masturbation seems like its just as bad, its not real. Its me basically forming a fake connection, its just like the physical act.
Im sorry, I just cant wrap myself around it. maybe you can shed some light on it. I love the feeling masturbation brings, and if there was a way I ould see that it was not a sin, I could get with that. But everything I can think of, just seems wrong to me.
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/3/2009 8:59:53 PM
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sunofone
Posts: 485
Joined: 10/11/2007
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quote:
Im sorry, I just cant wrap myself around it. maybe you can shed some light on it. I love the feeling masturbation brings, and if there was a way I ould see that it was not a sin, I could get with that. But everything I can think of, just seems wrong to me. I isolated this part of your post simply because this perfectly illustrates the bottom line. If it's sin to you, then it's sin.
For me it's natural normal, not going to lose any sleep over self pleasure.
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/4/2009 12:38:06 AM
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tylakeland
Posts: 19
Joined: 11/14/2008
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I totally understand that point, but can we use that reasoning with everything. Remember that when the children of Israel did what was right in their own eyes, they fell. I'm just trying to understand. I know that Paul writes that if you do what is wrong in your own eyes, and you do it, you sin. So what keeps us from just doing what we want on any given topic?. Its seems so easy for it to be okay. But I'm praying for wisdom, and moving forward in freedom.
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/4/2009 6:39:03 AM
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sunofone
Posts: 485
Joined: 10/11/2007
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quote:
ORIGINAL: tylakeland
I totally understand that point, but can we use that reasoning with everything. Remember that when the children of Israel did what was right in their own eyes, they fell. I'm just trying to understand. I know that Paul writes that if you do what is wrong in your own eyes, and you do it, you sin. So what keeps us from just doing what we want on any given topic?. Its seems so easy for it to be okay. But I'm praying for wisdom, and moving forward in freedom.
I think that when you come to Jesus everything changes. First off you begin to understand what true love unconditional is and means. You begin to accept that God loves you now, later and forever. It's not based on you being perfect, because he loved you while you were yet a sinner.
It's not based on later because you still continue to be a person capable of sinning. It's not based on a future event, because then he would only love you after the fact, when the future event took place.
Coming to Christ is a realization that we don't have to be ashamed of our nakedness and put on fig leaves, I. E. false spirituality to cover it up(Self Righteousness) Instead we put on his his covering provided by his sacrifice(His Righteousness) and it's not about stuff we do and don't do; but it's all about what he did.
Realizing this we have this awesome weight lifted from us, a weight we couldn't lift anyway. We began to simply rest from our vain attempts to be spiritual and holy and blameless and just rest in his finished work.
Then quite naturally fear begins to rear it's ugly head and our self conscience wants to take the reigns and condemn us, but God says no I'm greater than your conscience.
But God surely it can't be this simple what can separate me from this love? God says nothing, we say everything. We go over our long laundry list of sins, God says forgiven. We reason but surely there are rules and regulations to follow right? God says yes, but I've made it impossibly easy for you, that's why I said it's easy and light. Just love me, yourself and your neighbor and our fellowship will grow and be unbroken.
It is at that this point when most of us either become a Pharisee or a Saducee. We need rules and doctrines and customs and rituals to make sure we're living right. In other words we don't trust God, we trust ourselves. Oh we have great intentions, we want to be Holy and Spiritual but all we end up being is pious, hypocritical and ultimately sad depressed and hopeless.
If you've ever been here this is your last chance to truly walk in liberty where Christ has made you free. So does liberty mean lawlessness, a free for all, do what you want to do? Try really loving God, yourself and your neighbor as yourself. Try walking after his Spirit as opposed to the dictates of your own flesh.
If you simply begin to do this, you won't need false righteousness, you will be the righteousness of Christ, and you will be as far away from lawlessness as you have ever been by trying to keep law.
Simply do what he asked you to do, simply trust and rest in his finished work not your unfinished never gone to be good enough works. Then let's see how that feels. Lets just try that on for size.
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