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RE: Pet Peeves: What are the Worst Single Cliches? - 7/27/2005 11:00:36 AM
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iambridgetjones
Posts: 1
Joined: 7/27/2005
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I saw the link on crosswalk's main page to this thread and have gotten some laughs from reading some of the experiences some of you have had! we've all been there...! I think you've just got to be able to laugh at things people say...because most of the time they mean well, but honestly just don't know how to relate or how to affirm their single friends! I have to remind myself that because many of my married friends are happy being married, they just want me to be happy as well...and sometimes they don't understand that it's possible to be happy when you're not married (even if you don't want to stay single forever)!
My main reason for even signing up so that I could post here is to pass along a book that a friend recently gave to me - it's called "When You Least Expect It: What Not to Say to a Single Woman in the 21st Century" by Beth Grabenkort...(talk about one of the worst lines, right?! "You'll meet him when you least expect it") Anyway, the book will make you laugh out loud as the author shares her own stories on this subject...including the fact that she refers to all married people as "the Yoked" :) but she also provides an excellent perspective from Scripture about singleness and marriage. Here's the link to the publisher's site:
http://www.publishamerica.com/shopping/shopdisplayproducts.asp?Search=Yes
It's $10 there, which is cheaper than Amazon or ebay...
I give it 2 thumbs up! Great for some laughs with your single friends :)
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RE: Pet Peeves: What are the Worst Single Cliches? - 7/28/2005 8:45:54 PM
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someguy
Posts: 32
Joined: 5/5/2005
From: Huntsville, AL
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quote:
ORIGINAL: SciFiGirl
...when other friends say "all guys are jerks"...
I dismiss these statements as either the person is having a really bad day or unhappy.
_____________________________
Curtis
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"The church is not a society of the successful. It is a fellowship of the forgiven." -- Rober Munger
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RE: Pet Peeves: What are the Worst Single Cliches? - 7/29/2005 1:22:29 AM
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MaybeTomorrow
Posts: 30
Joined: 6/20/2005
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Married to a single: 'Marriage is a lot of hard work!'
DUH!!! Who said it was going to be easy? Not every single person has marriage ideals that are romanticized and perfect. My well meaning married friends say this to me all the time and I get so sick of it. You have your set of problems and I'll have mine eventually and yes, hopefully I can learn from your mistakes, but stop complaining that it's so much work if you love that person as much as you say you do.
Don't rain on my parade when the whistle to begin hasn't even blown!!!!
_____________________________
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I have a problem.
It's me.
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RE: Pet Peeves: What are the Worst Single Cliches? - 7/29/2005 1:32:04 AM
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SciFiGirl
Posts: 875
Joined: 6/7/2005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: MaybeTomorrow
Don't rain on my parade when the whistle to begin hasn't even blown!!!!
LOL!!!!!!!!! Oh that is awesome! I agree 100% with your post!!
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RE: Pet Peeves: What are the Worst Single Cliches? - 7/29/2005 6:00:32 AM
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babbred
Posts: 696
Joined: 5/5/2005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: MaybeTomorrow
Married to a single: 'Marriage is a lot of hard work!'
DUH!!! Who said it was going to be easy? Not every single person has marriage ideals that are romanticized and perfect. My well meaning married friends say this to me all the time and I get so sick of it. You have your set of problems and I'll have mine eventually and yes, hopefully I can learn from your mistakes, but stop complaining that it's so much work if you love that person as much as you say you do.
Don't rain on my parade when the whistle to begin hasn't even blown!!!!
Those people are probably secretly feeling guilty, because part of them wants to be single again. Here's a tip: if you've done your homework and made sure that you've discussed the major issues (having children, finances) before you get married, then your marriage will not be hard work.
Let me tell you, I hate marriage books--especially Christian ones!--that say marriage is so hard, you'll be having fights during your first year, you'll be on the brink of divorce until you hear the author's message, etc. Good grief almighty.  DH and I have been married just over a year and we have yet to have a major argument. Since we were both older and knew what we wanted, we made darn sure to discuss all the major issues before we got to the altar, so there were no surprises afterwards. It also helped that we had both been independent for several years, so there was no big transition from being with family to being with each other. Moving in with DH felt perfectly natural. In fact, I secretly believe that people should wait until at least their late 20's to get married so they can "find themselves" and gain some maturity. Don't tell that to some Christians, though! 
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There's nothing better than a good friend, unless it's a good friend with chocolate.
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RE: Pet Peeves: What are the Worst Single Cliches? - 7/29/2005 12:12:52 PM
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someguy
Posts: 32
Joined: 5/5/2005
From: Huntsville, AL
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: babbred
In fact, I secretly believe that people should wait until at least their late 20's to get married so they can "find themselves" and gain some maturity. Don't tell that to some Christians, though!
That doesn't sound like such a bad idea. You really think that many people would freak out if you said it out loud?
_____________________________
Curtis
============================
============================
"The church is not a society of the successful. It is a fellowship of the forgiven." -- Rober Munger
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RE: Pet Peeves: What are the Worst Single Cliches? - 7/29/2005 12:20:42 PM
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Pirouette.
Posts: 27
Joined: 4/15/2005
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: babbred
quote:
ORIGINAL: MaybeTomorrow
Married to a single: 'Marriage is a lot of hard work!'
DUH!!! Who said it was going to be easy? Not every single person has marriage ideals that are romanticized and perfect. My well meaning married friends say this to me all the time and I get so sick of it. You have your set of problems and I'll have mine eventually and yes, hopefully I can learn from your mistakes, but stop complaining that it's so much work if you love that person as much as you say you do.
Don't rain on my parade when the whistle to begin hasn't even blown!!!!
Those people are probably secretly feeling guilty, because part of them wants to be single again. Here's a tip: if you've done your homework and made sure that you've discussed the major issues (having children, finances) before you get married, then your marriage will not be hard work.
Let me tell you, I hate marriage books--especially Christian ones!--that say marriage is so hard, you'll be having fights during your first year, you'll be on the brink of divorce until you hear the author's message, etc. Good grief almighty. DH and I have been married just over a year and we have yet to have a major argument. Since we were both older and knew what we wanted, we made darn sure to discuss all the major issues before we got to the altar, so there were no surprises afterwards. It also helped that we had both been independent for several years, so there was no big transition from being with family to being with each other. Moving in with DH felt perfectly natural. In fact, I secretly believe that people should wait until at least their late 20's to get married so they can "find themselves" and gain some maturity. Don't tell that to some Christians, though!
Thanks for the wise words, babbred. 
_____________________________
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RE: Pet Peeves: What are the Worst Single Cliches? - 7/29/2005 1:59:12 PM
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SciFiGirl
Posts: 875
Joined: 6/7/2005
Status: offline
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babbred,
I just loved your post. It made me feel better about not being married yet myself, that maybe it will be better in the longrun that I didn't get married young. I am so glad to hear that you didn't have those "first year horror stories" that so many people have (or at least that the books say so many people have).
And I understand what you're saying about marriage books - I think I dislike single & dating books just as much!
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RE: Pet Peeves: What are the Worst Single Cliches? - 7/29/2005 3:02:26 PM
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someguy
Posts: 32
Joined: 5/5/2005
From: Huntsville, AL
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: SciFiGirl
And I understand what you're saying about marriage books - I think I dislike single & dating books just as much!
I think there are some books for that very issue. 
_____________________________
Curtis
============================
============================
"The church is not a society of the successful. It is a fellowship of the forgiven." -- Rober Munger
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RE: Pet Peeves: What are the Worst Single Cliches? - 7/29/2005 7:24:06 PM
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liveit
Posts: 1
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
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I am a single mother, and it bothers me that people attribute my singleness to the fact that I had premarital sex six years ago.
Also, I hate when people say that I am single now so that I can have more time to do the work of the Lord. TRY ME! As a single mother I made it through four years of college working three part-time jobs and made it out fine. I'm quite sure adding a husband to my life will not keep me from the work of the Lord.
Sometimes I joke that I need to move to a larger city or church, and people seriously respond with this scripture to encourage me to WAIT. "HE who finds a wife finds a good thing," Yoohooo! I'm over here. Do I need to send up smoke signals. I can hook you up with a map if that's necessary.
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RE: Pet Peeves: What are the Worst Single Cliches? - 7/31/2005 12:26:26 PM
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MaybeTomorrow
Posts: 30
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: sunday.
how about when you're a third wheel and the couple starts making out in front you, wrestling and making loud kissy and giggly noises.
and how about couples (bf/gf) that consider themselves 'one' when splitting bills and such with you. so irritating.
quote:
quote:
Invisible...... like not getting to eat at the grown-up table during carry-ins?
OH MY WORD!!!!!!!
I hate when bf/gf couples want to half the bill with me. NO!! You're not married! You ate 2/3 of the food! Unless someone says 'lets go to dinner, my treat'...everyone pays for their own food. Same thing with splitting cost of gas for trips. Nuh uh...I'll pay for 1/3 and then you guys can figure out how you're going to pay for your part.
AND!!
If we're taking my car on a trip and I'm driving, you two are not going to sit in the backseat so I have to listen to your lovey dovey noises or bickering. Unless I'm being paid to chauffeur, someone better sit up front.
Oh that burns me!!
_____________________________
Dear God,
I have a problem.
It's me.
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RE: Pet Peeves: What are the Worst Single Cliches? - 8/10/2005 3:33:21 PM
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SciFiGirl
Posts: 875
Joined: 6/7/2005
Status: offline
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Here's a new cliche pet peeve... When a guy that I have a crush on tells me, "I know there is someone out there for you! God has a wonderful guy picked out!"
And you're thinking... "Yeah! And I thought it was you!"
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LOL!
Duh.
