RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (Full Version)

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SweetLittleErin -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 4:21:59 PM)

quote:

You have cute fur babies Erin.


Thank you!

quote:


I can see it with Zippy, but Zoey and Shadow must take after Klay

ROFLOL!!!


ANd for the record, we will not get rid of our pets when we have children...people with pets have kids and they co-exsist all the time. Our fur babies are and always will be our babies. I read a blog the other day where someone was complaining about how people call their pets their babies and how they are not and it down plays the "family." It really infuriated me, pets to some people are their babies. And its not always only because they dont want children. Babies dont come easily for everyone, and really and truely, my pets, especially my puppy, are my children. I feed them, play with them, teach them, clean up after them. Anyway, it just really annoyed me.



i_am_just_me -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 4:22:25 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: elastic

i'm the same way about my husband...i mean, he is an amazing, awesome, super duper man, but when i'm out with people, i generally don't gush about him unless they ask,,,,,and even when i give info about him, i don't continue to gush unless they probe.

i am the only one who is in love with my husband and nobody else really wants to hear about it....that's why i get most of my gushy posts on this board,,,where i can talk about him and how awesome he is in the gushy threads....the threads that people read because they want to read about wives gushing on their men. but normally, i don't just blurt out to all my friends on a daily basis about how awesome and amazing my dh is.....however, he IS awesome and amazing. [:)]


That is completly respectable! That's the kind of attitude I wanted to see! (sorry I just sounded like a football coach [:D]) but so many times, I have wanted to just blurt out "look lady! YOU love your husband, I DONT!" change subjects. or even just mention something really quick and move on.....



i_am_just_me -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 4:23:50 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: doinkdom

quote:

ORIGINAL: i_am_just_me
And with me being in the military, I cant talk to military wives too much because they do have so much pride in their husbands (which is good, military members need all of the support that they can get) but I cant sit their and listen while their wives are telling people things like, oh my husband is in charge of this (and he's something like an E-3 that has been in for 3 years --- he's not in charge of much) , and he does this, and he has to be on the ship 2 hours before it leaves to make sure that the ship is ready to go (newsflash, we all do, it takes that long to get it together - they crank it up 24 hours before it leaves) and most importantly - the ship would still leave if he wasnt there. Stop watching the join the Navy commercials thats not what we really do. (sidenote - I have been in for over 12 years. ) So yes, still support them, and be proud of what they do, but dont overdramatize it to make it sound better ....


[:D][:D][:D]I am an AF brat and dad was a lifer...so I've seen what you're talking about.



glad it's not just me being cynical. [:D]



i_am_just_me -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 4:25:24 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: moon_mouse

quote:

ORIGINAL: i_am_just_me

I cant stand when a 30 yr old mom is talking about how little bubba went tinkle in the pottie because he is getting ready for big boy pants and no more diapie/wipies...first off, you're 30....stop talking like that. Secondly, I end up feeling like an idiot because it is taking me a second to translate what she just said into English.



And if we must talk about such things, can we please, please, please not talk about them when we are eating! I especially don't need to know the color and texture of what dropped in the pottie!


I know!! When this happened to be, I was (halfway) listening, but I was also wondering if she had been stuck in the house all day and just couldnt wait to tell this story to someone (that's what it seemed like)



tiffanyctd -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 4:29:18 PM)

I just have to tell you all that I have thoroughly enjoyed catching up this thread for the last couple hours![:)]



stellaluna -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 4:29:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: i_am_just_me
Then at any military function, I automatically get the ever popular question
"what does your husband do in the Navy?" He makes sure that my couch doesnt go anywhere while I am on deployment! They dont even ask if I work, or maybe guess that I could be in the military too....

Ahahahahahahaha...hahahaha...that was funny! [:D]

I don't have any personal experience in the military, but I am familiar with some of the things you complained about. My cousin is in the navy and his parents routinely tell my mother all the things he's "in charge of" which are impossible for his rank. And an army friend luuuuuuuuvs to tell me stories about soldiers that are too big for their britches. His "Army of One" stories are hysterical! [8D]

Not only do I not understand talking baby talk to grown-ups...I'm not sure I understand using it with babies. [&:]



elastic -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 4:31:28 PM)

quote:

It really infuriated me, pets to some people are their babies. And its not always only because they dont want children.


our cat is our baby. really, she is. she acts like a kid. she does things that she knows is wrong, and then tries to hide from us or pretend that she didn't do it when she is caught. her 'innocent' face is indescribable.

she sleeps with us at night, keeps us company, plays with us, she's just part of the family...if/ when we have kids, we'll keep our kitty. she'll be the big sister.



lexie -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 4:33:16 PM)

quote:

I guess because I leave about 15 minutes from the Mexican border...


I know this is totally off topic but I just wanted to say....we live in a Muslim neighbourhood. My daughter's name is Akeelah which is African but comes from Arabic (Akilah). Once a Muslim lady asked my husband and I our daughter's name and we told her. She then said "Akeelah! Is she Muslim?"

Yes. We're Christian but we're raising our daughter as a Muslim.

Ok, back to topic.



tiffanyctd -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 4:34:46 PM)

Erin, you can talk about your furkids all you want around me. I'm sure I bore people with stories about mine!



artemis -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 4:37:09 PM)

My husband has been known to make references to our cat in his sermons [:D]



tiffanyctd -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 4:37:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: elastic

quote:

It really infuriated me, pets to some people are their babies. And its not always only because they dont want children.


our cat is our baby. really, she is. she acts like a kid. she does things that she knows is wrong, and then tries to hide from us or pretend that she didn't do it when she is caught. her 'innocent' face is indescribable.

she sleeps with us at night, keeps us company, plays with us, she's just part of the family...if/ when we have kids, we'll keep our kitty. she'll be the big sister.


My "son" does the same thing. DH thinks nothing of hearing me tear through the house screaming "give that back" after Macavety has stolen something. It happens almost daily.[sm=kitty.gif]



i_am_just_me -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 4:39:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: stellaluna
Ahahahahahahaha...hahahaha...that was funny! [:D]

I don't have any personal experience in the military, but I am familiar with some of the things you complained about. My cousin is in the navy and his parents routinely tell my mother all the things he's "in charge of" which are impossible for his rank. And an army friend luuuuuuuuvs to tell me stories about soldiers that are too big for their britches. His "Army of One" stories are hysterical! [8D]


Yes it is the same thing with parents, they have understandable pride but their stories are just so "not correct" - my mom is the same way. When I am talking to someone, I dont go out of my weigh to say that I am in the military (and my hair goes all the way down my back (seriously - to my belt loops) so people wouldnt guess that I am in the military until I have to show my id card for something (check cashing, credit cards, discounts [;)]) . then they just look at me weird. my drivers license photo is horrible so I tend not to show it off as much!

quote:


Not only do I not understand talking baby talk to grown-ups...I'm not sure I understand using it with babies. [&:]


I agree once again! Children learn language from what is being spoken around them. If they hear me call something by an incorrect term, they are going to keep calling it by the incorrect term. Maybe some people think that it is cute for a baby (drives me nuts) but I really cant stand to see a parent do it)



dance4joy -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 4:40:06 PM)

quote:

My husband has been known to make references to our cat in his sermons


Hehe! Cute. And it's definitely better than telling stories on you!

My hubby likes to pat my pregnant belly and say "come on my little sermon illustration"!



i_am_just_me -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 4:40:57 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lexie

quote:

I guess because I leave about 15 minutes from the Mexican border...


I know this is totally off topic but I just wanted to say....we live in a Muslim neighbourhood. My daughter's name is Akeelah which is African but comes from Arabic (Akilah). Once a Muslim lady asked my husband and I our daughter's name and we told her. She then said "Akeelah! Is she Muslim?"

Yes. We're Christian but we're raising our daughter as a Muslim.

Ok, back to topic.



[sm=wink.gif] I know where you're coming from! [;)]



myckey -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 5:34:07 PM)

I'll join in. I'm a single mother of 3, 2 of which are still at home (13 yo boy, 12 yo girl). I have never NOT worked, I can't afford not to. I sometimes feel like some of the parents at my kids school look down on me. Up until a 2 years ago when I switched positions here at work, I worked very long hours and it was near impossible to volunteer or be involved in the kids school. It felt like they held that against me. Now that my job is more flexible I've become more involved. Also, my hours changed to where I get off at 3, which leaves me plenty of room to make a nice dinner, help with homework, do extracurricular activities with the kids, etc. Plus I don't work Sat anymore and that frees up a whole lot of time to get things done. I'm extremely blessed.



i_am_just_me -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 5:43:05 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: myckey
I sometimes feel like some of the parents at my kids school look down on me. Up until a 2 years ago when I switched positions here at work, I worked very long hours and it was near impossible to volunteer or be involved in the kids school. It felt like they held that against me.


I hear ya![sm=funny.gif]

My kids teachers are always asking for parent volunteers for stuff and I just can't do it! Plus, I think that some of the things that they are asking for volunteer assitance is absurd! (prime example - 2nd grade teacher asked if a parent could volunteer cutting out numerous strips of paper and the use of her(teacher) time for tedious projects was a waste because she could be doing other things for the class - pretty close to exact phrasing - My first thought was "suck it up, buttercup! if I need something done at my job are you going to come do it? no! " so asking for volunteers is one thing, abusing it is another. but back to the OP, since I work during the day, I dont have time to sit at home cutting strips of paper, it's tedious for me too! More power to the parents that can volunteer, but I shouldn't feel ashamed because I can't.



landabee -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 6:08:44 PM)

First: Thank you, Erin for having the courage to start this thread. [;)][:)]

I am a divorced, single mom of two teen sons.

I have worked outside of the house pretty much from the start. It was survival.

That being said, I enjoy my work. I find it stimulating and enjoyable. I think it helps me to appreciate evenings and weekends with my sons.

I can relate to those ladies that are married without children, for whatever reasons. I was married over five years (and trying infertility treatments) before I successfully carried my eldest. Rude doesn't begin to describe people that think that they can exhort (yes, exhort) you to have children.

I seriously wonder how long this thread will survive....

There is more to me than my uterus, offspring, what I wear and whether or not my marriage is gush-worthy.

Anywho....... I don't begrudge anyone their happiness in their personal choices. I simply desire the same consideration.

As for how the house cleaning and cooking are accomplished:

Both sons are well taught how to clean, cook and wash dishes and clothes.

We share all of the chores. Who ever gets to it first........ or who ever I delegate. [;)]



reach -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 6:29:38 PM)

I work outside the home. My husband makes good money, but we have so many things to do to the house that we can only do if I work.

It is not that hard for me, as my husband is a cleaner, and he cleans and cooks. In fact, we have more arguments about the fact that he does too much for me.



Desert_ratt44 -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 7:38:08 PM)

What a great thread Erin!!

I work outside the home because I have to. Living in Southern California is NOT cheap and I work so we can eat and buy gas for our car and use some extra money to pay our car off faster.

When I do have a kid, I probably will stay at home simply because child care is outrageous and I have no one here to watch my kid if I do go back to work. What I make a month would probably be less than the cost of good childcare.

I would also stay home because I'm scatterbrained enough as it is without a kid, so I can imagine how I will be when I do have one.

I don't get too much backlash at all for choosing not to have a kid right now. My best friend is my #1 supporter. She and her husband waited 10 years to have their one child and she constantly tells me not to listen to anyone who has a problem with our life choices.

The only place that is hard to fit in though is church. All their women's ministries are in the morning while I'm at work. I don't think it's fair that they lump all women in the stay at home category.



artemis -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 7:57:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Desert_ratt44

The only place that is hard to fit in though is church. All their women's ministries are in the morning while I'm at work. I don't think it's fair that they lump all women in the stay at home category.


My current church is too small to have a women's ministry, but my old church was just like yours... almost all the women's events were on weekday mornings (with childcare provided) as if all good Christian women should be free on Thursdays at 9:00am or something [&:]



Desert_ratt44 -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 8:05:49 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: artemis

[almost all the women's events were on weekday mornings (with childcare provided) as if all good Christian women should be free on Thursdays at 9:00am or something [&:]


Ha! That's when our women's meeting is! It Tuesday at 9 a church pre-requisite or something?



nicole6598 -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 8:53:10 PM)

oh yes that is annoying that women's meetings are early in the morning. In our church we have a number of ones that are in the morning, a weeknight or on a sat or sun.



Mrs.Wifey -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 9:00:08 PM)

Well, our church has all their programs for women at night so I have to go to a Bible study from a different church, since it meets in the morning, lol. I do work during the day, but it's easier for me to request certain mornings off then to miss every other week because of DH's work schedule.



lexie -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 9:37:56 PM)

How do you all get ready for the work day? Are you a get everything together at night person, or do it all in the morning person.

I'm definitely a night person (all my stuff is ready at the door right now, my lunch is made and in the fridge, my tea bag is in my travel mug, Akeelah's diaper bag is packed, her bottles and lunch is together in the fridge). I always end up in a scramble in the morning trying to get everything together and get out the door. I can't waste time otherwise I sit in traffic which I hate, and as well my job is time sensitive, I can't be late.



artemis -> RE: Working (outside the home) Wives/Moms Support Thread (1/9/2008 9:54:01 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lexie

How do you all get ready for the work day? Are you a get everything together at night person, or do it all in the morning person.


I'm usually up and out the door long before my husband wakes up, so I set my clothes out the night before so that I don't have to turn on any lights in the bedroom. I take my showers at night, so in the morning I just get dressed, fix my hair, pack my lunch, read a chapter from my Bible and do some quick exercises. It takes about 30 minutes from the time I get up to when I walk out the door. I keep boxes of granola bars in my locker at work and eat breakfast about 30 minutes after getting there.



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