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dontbelonghere -> Waiting on the Lord (4/23/2008 7:45:50 PM)
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So I've been having a hard time in my prayer life as of late. I start praying, but there are no words, just "God please..." and then feelings of axiety, irritation, and frustration. (Some background for those who don't remember when I first joined: my son and only child, Joshua died when he was 9 1/2 months old and then my husband became abusive in his inability to properly deal with the loss. He left after 10 months of counselling. Then, I lost my job and could no longer afford my apartment because of the bills by ex-husband left me with, so I've been staying on the couch in my best friends house for several months now as I'm rebuilding my life after it collapsed.) Anyhow...I want desperately to crawl up into the arms of my Holy Father and let Him be in charge of this rebuilding process. So in my prayers, I've been asking Him to lead me in His direction. And help me grow closer to Him everyday. But lately I've been just feeling so redundant in my prayers to Him that I can't even get the words out. At my bible study this week we read 1st Samuel 3 where God calls Samuel for the first time and the way he answered God was, "Speak Lord, for Your servant is listening." So this week I've added that line to my prayers and really try to listen to what God is telling me instead of me doing all the talking. The result? I don't feel like I've heard where He wants me to go, and I still can't think of anything other than the same old requests and petitions I've had in my prayers for this past year and a half. And I'm not feeling comforted or like I've sucessfully crawled into the arms of my Savior to be still. So, with this I ask that perhaps someone can join me in prayer for my prayer life- that I'll listen to my Lord, and that I'll wait on Him. THANK YOU![:)][image][/image]
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