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RE: Today's Christian men...wimpy?

 
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RE: Today's Christian men...wimpy? - 5/23/2008 11:15:08 PM   
Prairiehiker


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I think this is where the problem. Most women are really looking for a good man, not a nice man. There's a difference. I can be nice to everyone I meet because I want to be like. But it doesn't mean I'm a good person. Being good is about character. Being nice is more about personality.
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RE: Today's Christian men...wimpy? - 5/24/2008 12:03:54 AM   
BugLady


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quote:

Couldn't we just be people and get to know each other too?


*sigh* Right! People should just be people! It is SO much easier to get to know people when you are just being a people yourself. Someday I'll be a people again...

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RE: Today's Christian men...wimpy? - 5/24/2008 12:39:59 AM   
Konstantinos


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quote:

I think this is where the problem. Most women are really looking for a good man, not a nice man. There's a difference. I can be nice to everyone I meet because I want to be like. But it doesn't mean I'm a good person. Being good is about character. Being nice is more about personality.


whats weird is that most girls my age think they want a nice guy.

it annoys the heck out of me that they prefer some dude thats skinny as a beanpole, wearing pink shirts, and has 10 tons of gel in his hair.

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RE: Today's Christian men...wimpy? - 5/24/2008 12:41:49 AM   
violinist_for_jesus


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Being a wimpy man or not has very little to do with how thin you are...pink shirts though...

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RE: Today's Christian men...wimpy? - 5/24/2008 12:19:54 PM   
trainfan


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Prairiehiker

I think this is where the problem. Most women are really looking for a good man, not a nice man. There's a difference. I can be nice to everyone I meet because I want to be like. But it doesn't mean I'm a good person. Being good is about character. Being nice is more about personality.


Excellent point.

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RE: Today's Christian men...wimpy? - 5/24/2008 4:36:50 PM   
Pauley464


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Prairiehiker

I think this is where the problem. Most women are really looking for a good man, not a nice man. There's a difference. I can be nice to everyone I meet because I want to be like. But it doesn't mean I'm a good person. Being good is about character. Being nice is more about personality.



If you are being nice to everyone, but aren't a nice man then that's not being nice, it's being manipulative.

If one is a "nice guy", you are nice because it's your nature. It's evidence that you are a "good man". And if you are a "good man", the result will be threating others nicely.

Being a "nice guy" or a "good man" are not mutually exclusive. Being a "nice guy" is how you treat others, Being a "good man" is a character issue. The former is a direct result of the latter.

I am a "nice guy" because I am "good man". You cannot truly be nice if you aren't good to begin with.

I have always used the terms interchangably.


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RE: Today's Christian men...wimpy? - 5/25/2008 6:13:18 PM   
StephenJ


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Wow my thread sploded.

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RE: Today's Christian men...wimpy? - 6/8/2008 3:04:14 AM   
Karyyk

 

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The way I see it, the wimpy "nice guy" is always nice to others, even at a detriment to himself (he's a doormat, and yeah, there are plenty of "nice" girls too by that definition). That's not good and it doesn't instill confidence in a potential mate (Is he going to expect his wife to be a doormat with him? Will he stand up for her if he never stands up for himself?). Of course, on the opposite end of the spectrum, you have the "bad boy" type, who's basically a selfish punk. The girl sees that he'll stand up for himself, and somehow that means he'll stand up for her too. He might in some cases, but only to make himself "feel" like a man. He generally doesn't care about much more than what's good for him. Either way, the girl is kind of up the creek without a paddle.
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RE: Today's Christian men...wimpy? - 6/8/2008 1:11:59 PM   
devinevessel


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I beieve there is a balance. It's possible for a guy to be nice and not wimpy. I even know a few. There are some Christian men that I know who are strong but not selfish, nice but are not spineless, sensitive but definitely not wimpy. It has been mentioned in this thread I think as well as other threads that women want the bad boys. Not all women want the bad boys just like not all men want the supermodels. I know I don't want the bad boys. They are such a turn off for me.

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RE: Today's Christian men...wimpy? - 6/8/2008 1:54:46 PM   
Pauley464


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quote:

ORIGINAL: devinevessel

I beieve there is a balance. It's possible for a guy to be nice and not wimpy. I even know a few. There are some Christian men that I know who are strong but not selfish, nice but are not spineless, sensitive but definitely not wimpy. It has been mentioned in this thread I think as well as other threads that women want the bad boys. Not all women want the bad boys just like not all men want the supermodels. I know I don't want the bad boys. They are such a turn off for me.



I agree with you 100%. Unfortunately, we're in an extreme minority. Most people don't believe there can be a balance. If you are identified as a "nice-guy", the vast majority equate you with "wimp".

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