RE: "Controlled Crying"

RE: "Controlled Crying" (Full Version)

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PrincessDonna -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/5/2008 9:02:45 PM)
You may find it didn't work now and it may in a few months. We did try a few times with Hannah before we decided it was just not the right thing for her.

TammyIsBlessed -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/5/2008 11:39:39 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lilyofthefield I'm jealous! LOL! I'd love any tips...[:)] I think with mine it's mainly just his personality so far. He's "spirited". Believe you me - we have 2 spirited ones as well!!! DD#1 and 3! I'm pretty big on routines. DD#1 ate every 2 hrs during the day on an eat/play/sleep cycle until "bedtime" when it was eat/sleep/eat/sleep until morning. She slept through the night 6 hrs by 3 weeks old, then quickly increased to 12 hrs by 8 weeks. DD#2 ate every 3 to 3 1/2 hrs during the day on the same eat/play/sleep cycle. She slept 8 hrs by 8 weeks. DD#3 ate every 3 hrs during the day on same cycle. This was our most spirited child and also our most inconsistent. She'd sleep through the night occasionally by 10 weeks - and then wake up to eat on other nights. By 4 months she was sleeping through the night probably 5 nights/week. By 5 months she was doing it all the time. DS ate every 3 hrs during the day. He slept through the night around 8 weeks as well. I tried to feed them on a consistent schedule. ie - DD#1 needed to eat around every 2 hrs. So I did that consistently, instead of 2 hrs one time and then 4 hrs the next. I also woke them in order to feed them (if I could - it can be hard to wake a baby that doesn't want to be woken up!) during the day in order to keep relatively on schedule.

EmilyAnn -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 12:19:41 AM)
Nicole (AU)- Thanks for the explanation. If I remember correctly, you have a degree in early childhood education or something similar. How do you feel about Erikson's theory? (Is he someone you learn about in Australia?) Out of all of the theorists we studied, I seem to lean more towards his teaching than any of the others. Some people argue that CC goes against his theory, but I don't agree. CIO would definitely go against his teaching, and I think may people don't know the difference. Nicole (Lily)- David sleeps through the night but has no routine. I would love for him to have one because I need some predictability in my life. I have heard that around 4 months many babies start to develop their own routine. Have you noticed Caden doing that at all? Caden seems to be a spirited little guy and he is so cute and fun!! He has a great little personality already. Janine- I am so glad you found something that works for you!! Jadon is a very blessed little boy to have such a loving mommy. You are doing an awesome job!!

nicole6598 -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 12:28:10 AM)
Yes I am a teacher. I had to look up Erikson as I forgot about him!! I studied that almost 9 years ago now [:D] I would need to read through my text books again to see what I thought of him. I know that I DO NOT like Jung or or Freud though!!

Flintejae -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 12:41:43 AM)
Tonight was SO much EASIER! He's still sleeping 4 hrs later! I need your thoughts on a situation. My mil thinks i'm letting Jadons schedule run my life vs. him revolve around mine. She misses us and feels like she's missing out because we dont go there like we used to. Yet she doesn't visit us here. my thing is how relatively SMOOTH our days are when he has routine in his own bed...even if i am more secluded. Should i try to get out and try to have ghim sleep in a packnplay? Is he running my life? Am i out of balance?

nicole6598 -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 12:45:07 AM)
Jae I would try the pack and play... It won't hurt to try. You could try using the pack n play at your place during the day a few times before you take it out to someone else's place. Do you think that could work?

Mrs.Wifey -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 12:46:15 AM)
Does he sleep in the pack and play better if you take sheets from home? We used to do that with Gabby when she first started sleeping at my MIL's. It also helped to do some sort of the same nap/bed time routine. Or what if you take his crib blanket? Although, I think I remember that being the age when I swore I would never visit my mother again if Gabby's sleep was always going to be so bad... My mother swore it would be better when she was older, and she was right. Our next visit when Gabby was 11/12 months was definitely easier sleep wise.

Flintejae -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 12:57:41 AM)
Hm. I haven't tried because so far it takes me 1-2 days to get him smooth again if i mess w/ his sleep at all. I will def. try the suggestions. I'm praying so much over our trip to dallas at the end of the month.

nicole6598 -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 1:01:31 AM)
Yeah that's going to be a big trip. How long is it for? Where will you be staying again?

Flintejae -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 1:03:53 AM)
3 nights/ 4 days. We are staying in a room w/ his mom. Lord let him not cry and be awoken w/ noise we cant shut a door to.us

nicole6598 -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 1:06:12 AM)
How long since you tried putting him in the pack n play though? He may have grown up a bit since then and be used to it....

Flintejae -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 1:16:12 AM)
He hasnt been in a pnp since he was 3 weeks old. He did play in one today since he's mobile w/ his rolling and i had to cook dinner.

nicole6598 -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 2:29:49 AM)
I think if you tried again you might surprised [:)]

Flintejae -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 3:40:41 AM)
WOOT! Jadon slept from around 6:30pm to 1:10am!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm up making sure he falls asleep before going back to bed which should be any moment!

nicole6598 -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 3:43:44 AM)
LOL Jae. Did you get any sleep at that time? I am very happy for you!! You are doing such a great job. So the place where you are staying, is there just a room with beds and then a bathroom and that's it? Or is there another room where the beds are? It's going to be hard if there is not another room...

Flintejae -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 3:52:13 AM)
It's all in the same room. [&o] Two queens, tv, and the bathroom and sink are separate. We had no other option, unfortunately.

nicole6598 -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 4:04:29 AM)
Hmmm that will be hard. You tried other places to find separate bedrooms I would gather... I would think at night it will be ok. I know 2 years ago Grace was about 2 then, we stayed in a place with no separate room, we just ended up letting Grace sleep when she could I guess. We made her stay up a little then went to bed pretty much when she did. I think your MIL is just going to have to deal with him waking or find herself another room (I don't know if that's an issue or not). You may need to do things a little different for a few days and get back into it when you get back. I would try to keep things as normal as you can, but try and enjoy yourself too!![:)]

manda59 -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 5:25:35 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Flintejae my thing is how relatively SMOOTH our days are when he has routine in his own bed...even if i am more secluded. Should i try to get out and try to have ghim sleep in a packnplay? Is he running my life? Am i out of balance? Well, for me, I mostly went for the secluded life! At least till mine started dropping daytime naps, or I could substitute a nap for travelling in the car at about the same time as a nap would have been. I needed the relative routine and order to my day (and night). And I didn't care what anyone else thought. I couldn't afford to (for my mental health). I saw my mother once a week with my ds, and just stayed an hour. We did one visit away from home when he was 4 months old, and that went ok (we still kept to his routine while we were away, as best as we could), but I didn't really start going out (except to town/the supermarket) till my ds was 9+ months old. Do what feels right for YOU, Janine, not anyone else. If YOU want to get out more now, do it; or if you want to get out more in the future, put it off for now and think about it again in a couple of months. Jadon's approaching a stage where he may well change quite rapidly (and that includes his daily routines) so it won't do any harm waiting a while, if that's what suits you best.

3cappuccinosmom -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 6:37:23 AM)
quote: my thing is how relatively SMOOTH our days are when he has routine in his own bed...even if i am more secluded. Should i try to get out and try to have ghim sleep in a packnplay? Is he running my life? Am i out of balance? From another "secluded" person [8D]....no. If the only way for you all to be happy and get enough sleep is for Jadon to have a routine, then visiting even the most beloved of mothers-in-law has to come in second. He's only a few months old, there are decades ahead for her to enjoy him and for you all to travel. [;)]

nicole6598 -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 6:50:07 AM)
You getting it Jae? Its ok to say NO to people [;)][:)] If your mother in law can't come to you and you aren't ready to go out then don't do it. I like my routine. People always joke about me "uh oh its 5pm, Nicole must be getting hungry for dinner". EVERYONE knows that about me and they pay me out about it but I don't care. I do what works for me. BUT if you do want to get out, then try the pack n play or whatever else. The final decision is yours, don't let other people dictate how you are going to run YOUR family hon[:)]

Sideways -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 7:54:18 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Flintejae I need your thoughts on a situation. My mil thinks i'm letting Jadons schedule run my life vs. him revolve around mine. She misses us and feels like she's missing out because we dont go there like we used to. Yet she doesn't visit us here. I agree with Maggie. He won't be this long forever, and if your MIL can't get off her duff to visit you (short of some extreme physical condition), then she really doesn't have much say in the matter. I'm lucky in that I can mess with Nathan's sleep every once and a while, and when he was younger he just napped in the car. But things always go a bit better with a routine. Stick to your guns, dear, and let MIL simmer. Why are MIL's like this? Don't they remember being moms, too? We're going to have to stay overnight at my parents when dH paints Nathan's new room, but that shouldn't be to bad.

lilyofthefield -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 8:33:54 AM)
Thank you, Tammy. He usually eats every 3 hours during the day and naps at pretty consistent times too. Maybe I need to get him more worn out during the day! LOL He slept great at the beach where he went in the water and spent hours outside everyday. Emily, you are so sweet. Thanks! David has quite the personality too. They cracked me up the last time they saw each other. [:D] Caden does seem to want a routine as he started napping at pretty consistent times. His routine can be pretty easily upset if we're out or something though. Jae, I agree. Maybe your MIL should just agree to come over and visit more until Jadon is just a little bit older. At this age, you need to do what works for you and Jadon.

Flintejae -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 8:58:49 AM)
Thank you for your thoughts! She only lives 7 minutes away so that's why I can't use the car as nap time. Eventually I will try the pack n play. I'll just have to decide when. She is really great, but has this thing about being at her own home. I'm not sure what it is. I'm so excited! Jadon slept 6.5 hours his first stretch and 5 his next! He was up at 6:30am happy as a clam!!! Love you guys! bbl when im not finger pecking lol

manda59 -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 9:11:25 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Flintejae I'm so excited! Jadon slept 6.5 hours his first stretch and 5 his next! He was up at 6:30am happy as a clam!!! Excellent!! [:)]

Flintejae -> RE: "Controlled Crying" (10/6/2008 9:43:28 AM)
Okay, so now I can actually type. :) How is everyone doing today? Did your little ones get sleep last night? Did you?

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