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RE: Babies in Church - 2/20/2009 11:35:30 AM
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Tinkerbell_
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Szaftoo
I understand and respect where you are coming from. I nursed both of my kids just before church and that got them through the service. I had bottles for them but they were never used. When we picked them up, we were given a paper that told us when they were fed, changed, etc. During their time in the nursery, they had worship music softly playing and they were prayed for by the mothers who cared for them.
I was able to focus on the service and not worry about my kids because I knew they were well cared for. I am not saying my kids would have been a distraction, however, church was my time to be fed spiritually and that was important to me.
As far as being trained while in the adult service, I don't completely believe the best way for children to learn is by "osmosis". I want praise and worship music and Biblical teaching geared to their age level. I want them with other kids their own age for fellowship and who will eventually hold them accountable.
My kids are young adults now and have a strong walk with the Lord. Much of the credit goes to dedicated child care and youth workers.
We all do what we feel is right for our children and that is what worked for us.
This is pretty much how it was when my boys were younger. I had them in nursery as soon as possible, and they stayed there until they moved to children's church. Now Thing 1 sits with me during the service because they don't have anything for the youth during that time. Thing 2 goes to children's church but occasionally joins us in the service. He's fairly sharp and likes to hear the adults preach as well.
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/20/2009 11:37:34 AM
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Ellie-Mae
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I also wouldn't go to a church that didn't allow for parents to be the parents of their children and choose what is right and best for them. Children should be seen as a part of the body of the church, not as a a separate entity of the church, and especially not as a distraction to be stuffed away, out of site and hearing. I have nothing against parents choosing what is best for their children. There is no one-way-fits-all-kids, that is one of the reasons that these sort of decisions should be left to the parents. For years our older kids stayed with us and loved listening to the pastor, asking questions, and taking apart in family conversations about the sermon. The younger children go to JR church now. We have wonderful people doing it who love the kids. The kids really enjoy it, but I am not convinced that it has been necessarily what is best for my kids. My children RARELY ever went to the nursery as babies. That was what was best for our kids. I would NEVER tell my kids that their mere presence anywhere was could send someone to hell. I have had conversations about how when they are disobedient by being disruptive that that could be a hindrance to someone hearing the gospel or learning something else that they might need... but I have only had to do that for Sunday School, VBS, and most recently JR church. When they are with us, it doesn't become an issue.
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/20/2009 11:44:35 AM
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BlessedMamaofmany
Posts: 1710
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From: Just north of nowhere
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quote:
ORIGINAL: CarlaJames
What if the movie theatre said no babies ( and a lot do) would you stop going to that theatre or find a babysitter?
Again..did you or did you NOT watch the video?
If not.....I'm done.
*I* would not go to that theater
quote:
Children should be seen as a part of the body of the church, not as a a separate entity of the church, and especially not as a distraction to be stuffed away, out of site and hearing. I have nothing against parents choosing what is best for their children. There is no one-way-fits-all-kids, that is one of the reasons that these sort of decisions should be left to the parents.
EXACTLY!
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/20/2009 12:00:56 PM
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stellaluna
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I watched the whole video. I am not a parent. I find it completely asinine that children of any age would not be welcome in the sanctuary or "war zone" or whatever descriptive phrase you want to use for a room in your church building.
There are many reasons for putting a child in a nursery or Sunday school or children's program at your church. I personally think most kids would benefit from some exposure to those things, just because it's fun and it gives them some room and opportunity to run around and it puts them in a position to make friends with other kids from their church. For new parents, letting a nursery worker rock the baby for an hour or so might even mean a welcome respite. None of the good reasons for utilizing children's programs should override a parent's decision--or a child's right--to have kids worship with the body of believers. Ever.
After my nearly 40 years of attending church, I have never witnessed a parent who didn't take a disruptive baby or child out of the sanctuary during a service. If a child is repeatedly disruptive and the parents seem unwilling or unable to handle the problem then yes, I would expect an elder or some church worker to gently ask the parents to make arrangements for their kid, whether that means sitting with them in the cry room or sending them to the nursery or kids program.
But I am absolutely APPALLED at the idea that a church would ban children of an certain age group from their sanctuary. If I attended that church, I wouldn't any longer.
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/20/2009 12:28:32 PM
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BlessedMamaofmany
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I suppose it should be obvious that since babies are a blessing from God, they'd be welcome in His house??
I just want to say again, I have no issues with nurseries, I use mine and have nothing against those who use it also. But, to be told my children are unwelcome is unacceptable.
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Atheism: The belief that there was nothing, nothing happened to nothing, then nothing magically exploded for no reason, creating everything, then a bunch of everything magically rearranged itself into self-replicating bits that then turned into dinosaurs
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/20/2009 12:57:14 PM
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PrincessDonna
Posts: 6480
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From: Cow country, Upstate NY
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Back to the OP... 
quote:
What do you do with your infant/newborn/young baby in church?
I've been attending my church for less than a year. Other churches I've been to in my adulthood I've always noticed babies in the service, with a mom taking baby out if baby gets too fussy. But this current church I've not seen any babies in either service (traditional or contemporary). There is a conference room set up in the office area behind the auditorium that says it's for mothers of newborns. I don't know if anyone uses it since I'm not back there during the service.
I don't want to sit in a conference room during church, I want to be a part of the service. But I also don't want to be the mom who alienates the rest of the congregation by having a baby in the service, even if she's quiet.
Would it be reasonable for me to try to take baby in the service and then sit near the door?
(I'm still only 27 weeks pregnant; I'm just planning ahead.)
Christine, I have always taken my young babies into church with me and left if needed. Once they are getting around and not able to sit still, around a year old, I put them in the nursery. With Hannah and Levi, I did go to the nursing area when they needed to nurse (and our church service is regularly about 2 hours, so they DO need to nurse during church). With this baby, I have been nursing her right where I sit. Why? Because I am in a place spiritually where I need to be in the service. If I am getting up with her and leaving, I feel like I might as well not go to church. True or not, that is where I'm at.
I have nothing against nurseries, but I don't like my pre-walking babies there. I don't see a need for them to be there, and honestly, I enjoy the time I have with them in the service.
Now, you're not asking about older kids, but my 2 and 4 year old do go to their classes after worship. They have a great curriculum and teaching on their level and I don't have to chase their wiggly little selves. My older boys, 8 and 9, are more than able to sit in service, and they do so whenever there isn't Junior church.
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/20/2009 1:01:35 PM
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PrincessDonna
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Okay, I was making that post while others were being made. Now, mod hat on...
I have deleted all off topic posts. Please stick to the topic of the opening post. If you want to discuss other issues, start another thread.
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/20/2009 1:05:19 PM
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BlessedMamaofmany
Posts: 1710
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I nurse in church too...but after 4 nurslings...I'm much more comfortable with it..and it's easy to cover up enough.
Sorry things got off topic christine,
Back to the op
Taking the little one in church shouldn't be an issue...when's she tiny, she'll likely sleep through the whole thing, especially if you feed her right before you leave. Or if you wear her (I wore my 4th in a wrap and the kid never woke up LOL)
As far as no others, I'd say what I said earlier...all those grandparents and a tiny baby to look at...oh yeah, I think you'll be fine LOL
Sandy
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/20/2009 3:33:38 PM
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BlessedMamaofmany
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that must have been really hard for her christine.
What do you have in mind as far as carrying? Sling, wrap, carrier?
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Atheism: The belief that there was nothing, nothing happened to nothing, then nothing magically exploded for no reason, creating everything, then a bunch of everything magically rearranged itself into self-replicating bits that then turned into dinosaurs
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/20/2009 5:36:26 PM
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BlessedMamaofmany
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that's a good idea Euty! Of course, you and hubby need to be prepared for the answer being 'no kids thanks'....
But..even when I went to church primarily filled with older people, there was a baby or two and never a cross word or look passed..
Sandy
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Atheism: The belief that there was nothing, nothing happened to nothing, then nothing magically exploded for no reason, creating everything, then a bunch of everything magically rearranged itself into self-replicating bits that then turned into dinosaurs
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/21/2009 6:57:39 AM
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MrsTracy72
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Some churches are not against children, but they are not "child friendly" My kids go to their classes because that is wehre they get the most benefit. When they were babies, I loved having them in church with me, but once they were talking, it was time to let them go and learn. I don't think kids learn much from an adult service. But the sad thing is that when I left my old church, we didn't even have Sunday School or anything for the kids. So my kids really were wasting their time being there because even the hymns and order of service made no sense to them. That is a problem with many churches. Our current church welcomes the children, but the programs they run during service are so good that most parents just use them.
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/23/2009 4:47:11 PM
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W.O.F.
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quote:
ORIGINAL: christsstar
quote:
ORIGINAL: MrsTracy72
quote:
I just read this post...and I have to say I am leery of churches that do church this way. When do they teach children how to worship God other than just in Sunday School? When do families worship together? This type of congregation trains its youth how NOT to attend church...and most parents buy into it. I am glad you are not going to be doing so...but I tend to run from churches with this type of service set up.
That is sad that you run from churches like that. I moved from a church that didn't have anything but Sunday School for my kids to a church that not only has Sunday School, but doesn't run until after praise and worship. I don't expect my 4 year old to sit through a sermon and understand it so why not send her to something she can understand, and I get to listen to the entire sermon without telling her to sit quietly.
We used to attend a church that kept the kids in the service and my kids got nothing from it. Now, after two years, my son wants to be baptized, my daughter is praying on her own with no input from me, and my other daughter is just starting to get it. I think that at least for my church, they do a pretty good job about taking the kids during the service and teaching them what is age appropriate.
I would always go to a church that has things for the kids during the service and I would always send my kids to that program.
I'm not speaking for her either, but I think that she was referring to the fact that my church has NO kids in the service. That none of the families bring them in. Therefore if she wanted to take her children into the service, she would be alone in that.
yep...that is exactly what I meant!
Also...I know a lot of people think that all the training that child gets spiritually needs to be at their level...I don't buy that. I do believe in the importance of Sunday School, but the largest portion of age appropriate spiritual training is to come from the parents in the home. Deuteronomy backs that one up.
I have 18 years of child-rearing under my belt..and I have to say....of my 5 kids..the ones that were the most spiritually mature as children were those that sat in SS (when I was in SS) and then sat in the main service with us and learned by osmosis.
I just wonder how churches that constantly seperate families manage to re-connect the youth back into the church?
The major trend with today's teens and early 20's is to NOT attend church, even if they are believers, because there is no reason to belong or connect. They've been kept separate for so long that they do not see themselves as part of the corporate body. Obviously there is more to this than just churches that ship kids and teens off to do their own thing during worship (because Children's Church can have great value......), but there needs to be that balance between connecting with the Church body and individual worship.
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/23/2009 6:52:50 PM
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MrsTracy72
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Joined: 2/28/2007
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quote:
I just wonder how churches that constantly seperate families manage to re-connect the youth back into the church?
In my church, they keep the kids in part of the service, then send them to their classes. You don't have to send your kids, but I do because I think that it is appropriate for them to be there for praise and worship, but they really don't get much out of the sermon and so Sunday School is good for them. BUT, there are so many options in my church. Sunday school runs for two out of the three services on Sunday and the third service is for children's choir. That means kids up to 5th grade. Many families send their kids to Sunday school both hours and volunteer for something the first hour, go to a spiritual formation class the second hour, and then are reunited with their kids for church during the third hour. During that hour, the kids stay for praise and worship and go to choir, or just stay through the entire service. There are also many parents who keep their babies in church for praise and worship and then put them in the nursery for the sermon. Once the kids hit 6th grade, they go to church with their parents and have their own spiritual formation class. It all works out really well.
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/24/2009 1:36:29 PM
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ConsiderHim
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We were in a similar position when our first was born. Everyone took their children to the nursery or to "Children's Church".
We made sure we arrived a few minutes early to nab the back seats by the door. Brought bottles, burp rags, sippy cups, snacks, whatever was needed. Seems like the first 6 months I was in the lobby more than I was in the service! But by the time my second child was born there were two other moms bringing their little ones in too! By the time our third came along almost all the new moms were bringing their children into the service. Before our fourth was born the church had built a small room in the balcony with one way glass and a speaker so the sermon could be heard. They even installed a sink, changing table and a rocker. You never know, maybe you will start a good trend!
Now you might want to know that the group of older people who sit in front of us have been subjected to loud burps, sippy cups under their feet and the rare pacifier to the head.... and yet they still sit near us and they still tell us our children are very well behaved???
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/24/2009 2:09:17 PM
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MrsTracy72
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quote:
ORIGINAL: manda59
quote:
ORIGINAL: HeaterBox
I think it's up to the parents...but it's a lot better for them to be in child care so you are free to worship with your whole attention and they can learn on their level.
Since this thread is about babies, could I just ask you how/what you think babies learn whilst in the creche?
Manda, is creche the womb? Just wondering because I have never seen that word. If so, they learn music while in the womb. They learn to recognize voices while in the womb, and they learn to pick up on the mom's emotions while in the womb. So I believe that all that leads up to them learning everything.
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/24/2009 2:14:58 PM
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BlessedMamaofmany
Posts: 1710
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I think she means childcare Tracy..since the post she quoted says childcare is better for them
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Atheism: The belief that there was nothing, nothing happened to nothing, then nothing magically exploded for no reason, creating everything, then a bunch of everything magically rearranged itself into self-replicating bits that then turned into dinosaurs
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/24/2009 2:27:07 PM
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MrsTracy72
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LOL, thanks. Just had to ask.
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RE: Babies in Church - 2/24/2009 3:06:28 PM
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zoebob
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From: land of limbo
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I think that is what htey call nursery over there.
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Christine 
BUT there were times I wanted my kids with me as long as they weren't disruptive. Dd always went to classes, while ds fussed many times and I would just take him with us. I think there the leadership needs to be open to the needs of their congregation.
