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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/20/2009 10:56:59 AM
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Sideways
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I was blessed with nearly 9 hours of straight sleep last night, and I'm still exhausted, but I think that's not unusual considering we had so much night driving and a multi-stop vacation. Nathan is still recovering from his time in the sun, and he's misbehaving a lot. I think once he has a few days to settle at home and rest he'll be better.
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Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream. If you see a crocodile, don't forget to scream.
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/20/2009 1:02:33 PM
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Mrs.Wifey
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From: The Gorgeous plains of Colorado
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What do you consider misbehaving?
Gabby has just been into everything lately, she so entirely reminds me of my younger sister(with whom she shares a name) that it's not even funny. They are so similar that my mom and I spent my last trip there calling Gabby by my sister's name 
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Ryanne- trying hard to be my husband's girlfriend and my daughter's mother.
I'll keep my guns, freedom, and money- you can keep "the change."
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/21/2009 12:39:14 PM
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Hazel2
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Manda, I am praying for your daughter. She sounds lovely and I hope she isn't burdened by health issues at her age.
Donna, I totally "send in the big guns" when the girls aren't responding to me. I don't always agree with John's approach (eg, spanking to encourage them to stop crying ... one of my favorites), but I've learned to sit back and let him be a big meanie. It's the only way he maintains his authority with them. My own authority is watered down by constant availability and my nurturing role. No one takes me that seriously, I'm afraid.
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Will you please remember my husband, John, in prayer He is not saved. Thank you and God bless you!
"Be kind. Everyone you meet is in the midst of a great battle" Plato
I sometimes blog at defrazzled.blogspot.com
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/21/2009 5:09:03 PM
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myka
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quote:
What is misbehaving? Well, he's saying NO! a lot more, throwing more tantrums... he just seems not in control of himself. I think (I hope) he'll settle down after a few days at home. Yesterday he was almost completely beside himself but he's a bit better today.
I've found that my kids needed an 'adjustment' period at the beginning of 'family get-togethers' as well as after. Kinda like a transition time where they would be more irritable and rather grumpy. I think it is rather normal (I kind of feel like that sometimes, too), and the kids don't really know what to do with their emotions. I usually would schedule more 'down time' just to decompress.
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/22/2009 4:35:00 PM
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Sideways
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Hee. We just had a small summer storm pass by with thunder. Beth started to fuss at some point, and Nathan said "It's ok, Beth. Mommy's here." At least he calls me mommy when he's talking about me, just not directly to me.
_____________________________
Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream. If you see a crocodile, don't forget to scream.
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/22/2009 11:00:14 PM
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nicole6598
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Manda your daughter is in my prayers.
Ryanne- how is things with your dad's job situation going?
Donna- awesome Brian made it up there. I sure bet they behaved after that!!!
(((Ruth))) I am glad that Greg is so helpful.
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Proud Aussie, Wife, Mother, Woman!
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/23/2009 10:54:46 AM
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PrincessDonna
Posts: 6477
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From: Cow country, Upstate NY
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I had the best day yesterday! My sister and I and our three girls went shopping at the outlet center. Sis needed some nursing bras, and we found a great sale on those. She also got a couple really nice nursing shirts that will serve her well this summer. I got some jeans for $12!! And three new bras that fit me perfectly. I can't remember the last time I had three new bras at once, and certainly not as nice as these ones! I got $32 Bali bras for $13 each, because they had a buy 2 get 1 for $1 sale, plus I had a coupon to save 15% on my purchase. Yay! Also found Hannah a cute one piece bathing suit and sundress/coverup for $12 at children's Place! Double Yay!
On top of that, it was great to spend some time with my sister and her new little one. I hope I was able to encourage her that all that she is going through in her emotions and learning how to be a mom is NORMAL and she will get through it. Her husband went back to work Sunday night (he works 3rd shift), so she is without backup now. He has been really great these past two weeks...he's a great Dad!
Of course, I came home to Levi and Noah still being up at 11 pm, a trashed house, and not a thing on Noah's very easy to do list done.  I hate that...feels like I'm being punished for getting a break and having a good day, KWIM? But...I purposely decided not to throw a fit and just put the energy into picking up the house myself before I went to bed. A fit wouldn't have gotten me anywhere anyway...
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/23/2009 12:32:50 PM
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PrincessDonna
Posts: 6477
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From: Cow country, Upstate NY
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Okay...and on the other side of things today... 
Stupid insurance company messed up our wage loss check this month for some stupid reason. I can't get a real live person on the phone, of course. I have to be careful what I say to the insurance company, per our lawyer, and I really really really want to give them what-for. This is our only income! We depend on that check coming on time and for the correct amount.
Ironically, our car insurance payment is due tomorrow and I'm sure they'll have no trouble charging us a late fee if we don't get it to them in time, even though we are waiting for a check from THEM still!
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/23/2009 2:40:27 PM
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mamajennleigh
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Donna, I am so sorry that the insurance company messed up your check. I've been there, and it really stinks. It's amazing how they will certainly expect your PAYMENT on time but won't care how their PAYMENT to you is the hold-up! I have worked in insurance and have hated it ever since LOL!
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We may not have arrived, but Praise the Lord we've set sail!
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/24/2009 10:12:30 AM
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Sideways
Posts: 3366
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How are you feeling today, Donna?
My mom is here, and she's such a blessing. Before she arrived I had a cranky baby, a wrecked kitchen and a over-energetic toddler. Mom took the kids outside while I dealt with a contractor and then cleaned up the kitchen.
The contractor was a dad of 4 kids, and he was recently called back from layoffs because someone else quit. It was an irritation for me, as the personnel change caused delay in their promised service, but I'm glad the dad got his job back.
_____________________________
Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream. If you see a crocodile, don't forget to scream.
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/24/2009 11:54:27 AM
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PrincessDonna
Posts: 6477
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From: Cow country, Upstate NY
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Well, the same problems that existed yesterday are here today. So...yeah.
Nick had a half day of school today, and it was his last day. I picked him up. No summer school (YAY!!!!), but they passed him on AGAIN against Brian's wishes. They have done that every single year, and he remains at the bottom of the class and needing lots of extra help.  So why am I glad he's not going to summer school? Because I don't think it will really help him and it eats up our family time. He will be doing "Daddy's house summer school" anyway. We have Nick until Monday and then it starts the summer rotation...a week with her, then a week with us.
The zoo has a members only picnic tonight. We're going to that. Yay!
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/24/2009 12:18:45 PM
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Hazel2
Posts: 482
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Donna, how nice that you had one of those "perfect" days! I think God sends those days just exactly when we need them (and not a moment too soon!). You are a better woman than I am for not losing your mind when you came home!
I took the girls to playgroup today where I had a continuing series of "run ins" with my nemisis, the "other lisa" ... I am not usually easily offended, but this particular woman says so many negative things to me that I've become quite defensive (and immature) with her. She asked me if I had a maternity bathing suit and I told her that I had never invested in one but should, and that "under duress, I would occasionally wear my old two piece after first warning all involved". She is just a loud mouth and said so everyone could hear "ha ha ... my thinking on pregnancy and bikinis is "DON'T DO IT" ... let's face it, no one wants to see that ... ha ha ha". I mean, I am totally appalled to be in a bathing suit of ANY style with pretty much ANY one ... I don't go flouncing around in a suit without it being kind of necessary, especially pregnant!!! She dominates every conversation and is an expert on every topic and is so outspoken! She has a way of zeroing in on things that I am aware of as deficits and calling attention to them in front of crowds of other people. I get so MAD. Whew. That was a bit of a rant.
_____________________________
Will you please remember my husband, John, in prayer He is not saved. Thank you and God bless you!
"Be kind. Everyone you meet is in the midst of a great battle" Plato
I sometimes blog at defrazzled.blogspot.com
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/24/2009 12:26:12 PM
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manda59
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From: Hampshire, UK
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Hazel
The secret of dealing with people like that (if you have to deal with them and can't just choose to spend less/no time with them) is to tell them as little as possible, which effectively gives them less/no ammunition to use against you. The less you tell them about yourself, the less they can use against you. Tell them less, and turn the questions back on them.
For example, re the maternity bathing suit question; my response would have been "I've been thinking of getting one - what about you, do you have one? what's it like?" and so on.
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"Manda.....you said what I tried to say, just much better"
sharonjef, October 2009
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/24/2009 1:19:30 PM
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Hazel2
Posts: 482
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quote:
ORIGINAL: manda59
Hazel
The secret of dealing with people like that (if you have to deal with them and can't just choose to spend less/no time with them) is to tell them as little as possible, which effectively gives them less/no ammunition to use against you. The less you tell them about yourself, the less they can use against you. Tell them less, and turn the questions back on them.
For example, re the maternity bathing suit question; my response would have been "I've been thinking of getting one - what about you, do you have one? what's it like?" and so on.
I like it! You must have some experience with these things ...
She is not a very happy person and I think that she means no hard feelings with her mean comments ... she does not discriminate and will make anyone feel awkward or bad about anything. Last week she asked a woman in our playgroup if the birthmark covering one of her arms wasn't dirt. I could SEE it was probably a birthmark and imagined in my subconcious that my poor friend probably debated before dawning the first short sleeve shirt of the season (lest anyone notice and say something) ... I kept my mouth shut. But not the other lisa ... she made some motions to try to rub it off and then just asked about it. I felt horrible for my friend and did an internal eye roll. As another mutual friend pointed out ... you could know the other lisa for ten years and know as much about her as you did after ten minutes ... she's not easy to know which makes me think she isn't happy.
Anyway, Manda, I will employ your tactic and STOP GIVING HER AMMUNITION.
_____________________________
Will you please remember my husband, John, in prayer He is not saved. Thank you and God bless you!
"Be kind. Everyone you meet is in the midst of a great battle" Plato
I sometimes blog at defrazzled.blogspot.com
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/24/2009 2:57:28 PM
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manda59
Posts: 8204
Joined: 9/22/2005
From: Hampshire, UK
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Hazel2
I like it! You must have some experience with these things ...
With my mother.
Only she *does* mean hard feelngs with what she says. I don't blame her for it, and I forgive her for it. But I also recognise that that's just how she is, and I need to protect myself from it.
I can't change her, but I can change myself, and put myself in the driving seat, remaining civil and respectful, yet having a healthy boundary firmly in place, to protect myself.
Which means taking control of the conversation as much as I can, in terms of where it goes. But I do have to be on my guard the whole time, and I also can't afford to be looking for a conversation with her to meet any of my own needs.
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"Manda.....you said what I tried to say, just much better"
sharonjef, October 2009
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/24/2009 4:49:46 PM
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mamajennleigh
Posts: 977
Joined: 12/6/2007
From: Fuquay-Varina, NC
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quote:
With my mother.
Only she *does* mean hard feelngs with what she says. I don't blame her for it, and I forgive her for it. But I also recognise that that's just how she is, and I need to protect myself from it.
I can't change her, but I can change myself, and put myself in the driving seat, remaining civil and respectful, yet having a healthy boundary firmly in place, to protect myself.
Which means taking control of the conversation as much as I can, in terms of where it goes. But I do have to be on my guard the whole time, and I also can't afford to be looking for a conversation with her to meet any of my own needs.
Manda, are you sure we are not long-lost relatives? This is the exact description I would give of my relationship with my mother.
She loves, I mean really loves, to make comments about my weight. She can be so sneaky and underhanded about it, though, that sometimes I don't realize that she has just taken a cheap shot at me until later. The thing that kills me is that she is one size bigger than I am, and I'm not that big for cryin' out loud! She will pick up a shirt for me while she is out shopping that is at least 2 or 3 sizes bigger than I've ever worn even at 9 months pregnant! I long ago learned to just accept it with a smile, and then try to run it in and wear it if I like it, give it to Goodwill if I don't.
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We may not have arrived, but Praise the Lord we've set sail!
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/24/2009 5:07:21 PM
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Mrs.Wifey
Posts: 3406
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From: The Gorgeous plains of Colorado
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Can I just say... I have the bestest family every. My brother called earlier in the week to offer to buy me a plane ticket so I can go visit while he and his wife are in town(in Maryland). My mom is probably going to throw them a baby shower and I was really, really bummed about having to miss out on the whole thing. Like, make me cry kind of bummed. Buying a ticket wouldn't normally have been a big deal, but they only planned this LAST week and with us going on a weekend trip for the 4th of July it just wasn't real feasible for us. Now I will get to be there :) Even better, it was totally the Lord and ticket prices dropped $110 in 4 hours so I found a round trip ticket for $160!
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Ryanne- trying hard to be my husband's girlfriend and my daughter's mother.
I'll keep my guns, freedom, and money- you can keep "the change."
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/24/2009 5:31:53 PM
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mamajennleigh
Posts: 977
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From: Fuquay-Varina, NC
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Wow, Ryanne, that is so awesome - God is good isn't He???
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We may not have arrived, but Praise the Lord we've set sail!
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RE: SAHM/W Encouragement thread! (6) - 6/25/2009 12:10:22 AM
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PrincessDonna
Posts: 6477
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Cow country, Upstate NY
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Awesome, Ryanne! Gabby will go also, right? Boy, I wish we could get together sometime on one of your trips east! Maybe someday...there are many of you I would love to meet!
Our day was great. Except I counted on the kids falling asleep on the way home from the zoo, like they normally do...and no one but Esther and I slept. Don't worry...I wasn't driving.  It's always nice to go to the member's picnic. They do so many special things for us. Brian wore a shirt with a Jesus fish on it, and that got several conversations going with other Christians, most of them homeschoolers. Very nice. Hannah got to pet an elephant!! All the kids love the Bubble Man no matter how many times they see him. He is a must see every year. LOL
Brian wants me to come to bed, and then he turned on some idiotic show that he knows I can't stand. Um...grrr. Now I don't want to go to bed. But I have to. A new to the area, new to homeschooling friend is coming over to visit tomorrow morning. She's also the leader of the local La Leche League...cool, huh? Funny, we've been on the same local homeschool e-loop for a year now, and my sister met her in person when she came out to make sure nursing was going well for her. And now I (hopefully) have a new friend too! Way cool! Her kids are around Hannah and Levi's age. Yay!
Okay, enough babbling for one night...maybe the insurance goofballs will call me back tomorrow and fix this check issue. 
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