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At what point does it become LUST - 5/4/2009 7:54:17 AM
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woundedrock
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I am curious on what most men think. Is it when you admire a woman's beauty? Her figure? Imagine her naked? Or does it begin if you imagine her in a sexual situation?
For me, I guess it is if I would covet her over my wife whether it be for her beauty, confidence, or for sex. I believe it is possible for a man to admire a woman's physical appearance and not lust after her, however, some men (and 99% of teenage boys) may have trouble with this. I know this 'lust line' will probably vary greatly from man to man, but the results should be interesting.
(I hope this post is appropriate for this section as I know the mods are particular about topics regarding sex.)
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/4/2009 8:13:55 AM
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kd4hvz
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Personally, I say the line would be when you desire someone in a way that is not in keeping with the love that God would have for this woman as His little girl.
(edited for grammar)
< Message edited by kd4hvz -- 5/4/2009 10:26:15 AM >
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/4/2009 10:22:38 AM
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E_Lin
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I don't think there is one set answer, since every man is different. For some men, just looking at a woman they consider attractive is enough for them to stumble. While for others, they might appreciate a pretty woman, but not begin to lust until their eyes start roving over her body.
Ask yourself, "What is it that makes me think I am lusting when I look at a woman?" - "Am I willing to describe to God what I am seeing in this woman right now?" - "Is she a person, or is she an object of my desire?"
I don't buy that lust is only viewing someone in a sexual situation, unless a guy can go from seeing a girl to immediately picturing her having sex with him. And if a guy does do that, he has serious issues that need to be addressed, and should probably avoid women until he resolves them.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/4/2009 12:17:43 PM
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fosco_bunce
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It was described to me in my newcomers meetings when Harvey explained the differernce between a picture and a movie. When an idea or image comes into mind he described it as a black and white photo. It is an image that has no life and it just exists. But then when you toy with the idea and picture and then it turns into a color movie with action is when it changes from an idea into lust. It is then when you visualize yourself in a particular situation doing specific things in specific ways. It is then when lust can enter and you loose control and have to act out with that particular person or thing until it becomes alive in both actions and words.
Some say the three second rule works for them, others say they can become completely drunk on lust in three seconds. I would say for me that I have to surrender every thought when it is a black and white picture to God. I can't handle lust, it handles me.
JamesL SA
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/4/2009 12:44:05 PM
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APZR
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quote:
the differernce between a picture and a movie. When an idea or image comes into mind he described it as a black and white photo. It is an image that has no life and it just exists. But then when you toy with the idea and picture and then it turns into a color movie with action is when it changes from an idea into lust.
That's a good analogy. Since everyone has different levels of excitement, focus, and limitations, it makes good sense.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/4/2009 2:31:48 PM
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MowTin
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I think lust is the extreme of desire. Someone with a "lust for power" is obssessed with power and will do anything to attain it. If you lust after a woman then you are obsessed with her and will do anything to have her. Simply being attracted to a woman is not lust. It's just being human. However if that attraction consumes you and supercedes your love of God then it has become lust and it is a sin.
But of course meditating too much on a woman you're attracted to can easily lead to lust and thus should be avoided.
Just my opinion.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/4/2009 11:40:41 PM
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graceaddict
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It becomes lust when you stop caring about her wants and needs and only think about your own. What I mean is when you stop thinking about respecting her and start thinking about gratifying yourself, it's lust.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/6/2009 5:11:13 PM
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jn1010lf
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Hello woundedrock
I think there is a difference between admiration and lust. Admiration takes in much more than just a woman's physical body: her mind, her sense of humor, her relationship with the Lord. Admiration respects womanhood.
But lust is merely physical. It's a mind set that haunts a man and he just has to have it. Yes lust includes envision how she must look naked, whether or not she would give a thrilling night in bed. Lust degrades womanhood because all are regarded as food for a guy's appetite.
Yes, males do have a lustful side. Where there is lust there is male insecurity. I sex haunts them, they are trying to convince themselves that they are real strong men.
A man can only control lust through an intimate relationship with the Lord.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/6/2009 9:00:17 PM
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mrtigger
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quote:
ORIGINAL: woundedrock
Or does it begin if you imagine her in a sexual situation?
I think sexual fanatasies about a woman are lust.
I do not think simply noticing that a woman is attractive is lust.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/9/2009 9:43:27 PM
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BlackCapnHarlock
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Why do we ask this question? We know in our hearts when it's lust. When I focus on women's carnal areas I know it's lust and it's sin. I know the difference, we all do.
Let me ask a guy this, do you have a problem lusting after Bea Arthur? (RIP), Rose O' Donell? Joan Rivers?? Why they have the same as all other women do, why then aren't they in your hearts or minds?????
Exactly, I know the difference. I also agree that when we lust we only see women as sexual objects, we care not for her humanity nor for any sens of holiness of GOD, the death and resurrection of JESUS the CHRIST or the negative results of our actions.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/11/2009 10:47:18 AM
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dwain
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This is a great question for an artist. Portrait painting, nude studies and all associated with images
can be misinterpreted.
I always thought to myself, having never been to study an actual live nude, what a serious test of your
artist mettle it would be.
Actually (lately) I don't feel the need for anyone to judge me about my lust, except the Holy Spirit.As an artist my lust has always leaned towards pleasing the one for whom I might be representing with creative imagery.
I have looked at many and maybe read one anatomy book, and know the body in proportion is approx.
8 heads tall in most cases. I have measured my limbs and distances between various points of my own body.
I think others know when it becomes "that".
When I saw my father in his casket, and my grandfather on his death bed, They both looked like me.
What a marvellous miracle the human body is, that I take for granted at times *_*
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Deut. 33:27 The eternal God is thy refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.
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A Mans Greatest Weakness - 5/12/2009 6:22:57 PM
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Teaching_The_Way
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This is an interesting topic. Many men has problems with the issue of lust.
MSN Dictionary: (LUST) 1. desire sexually: to feel a strong desire to have sex with somebody
2. be eager for something: to have a very strong desire to obtain something
As written: 1 Corinthians 6:18 Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body NKJV
Run from sexual immorality, turn away from it, as if it were a violent volcano, with rivers of lava coming after you.
That is why we got rid of the general non-Christian TV because the commercials alone are very suggestive and immoral, and many old and new TV shows are highly immoral, some are in subtle ways but still wicked. Thats why we got Sky Angel TV services (ISPTV) for $25 per month Sky Angel ISPTV.
We do not allow anything immoral in our home that can tempt us. We do not allow our kids to listen to non-Christian music or anything immoral and against the ways of God. As it is written; Train up a child in a way they should go, and when they grow old they will not depart from it.
And when a man is tempted to look at a women, lets say in a store, then turn your head away from the women immediately so that you do not commit sin (Lust). Train your mind to be pure and holy. As it is written; Work out your salvation in trembling and fear (NT). Take control over your thinking and habbits, and then you will be less likely to sin. :)
God Bless
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RE: A Mans Greatest Weakness - 5/15/2009 6:16:35 PM
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dwain
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Jesus said, To look on a woman to lust after her is to commit adultery in your heart.
Adulterers do not inherit the kingdom of God.
Thoughts produce actions, actions produce habits, habits produce lifestyles.
Casting down imaginations and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God.
Taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.
Peace
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Deut. 33:27 The eternal God is thy refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.
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RE: A Mans Greatest Weakness - 5/16/2009 6:10:17 PM
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drstrat82
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quote:
It becomes lust when you stop caring about her wants and needs and only think about your own. What I mean is when you stop thinking about respecting her and start thinking about gratifying yourself, it's lust.
I like this. I find it difficult to believe that Jesus would turn His eyes from anyone (the old bouncing of the eyes trick). No, He would look at them in the eyes and love them for who they are. If we (men) would look at them (women) in the eye and love them with the love of God instead of making them objects of our desire, then the seed of lust would fall on rocky ground and die.
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I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.
Galatians 2:20
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RE: A Mans Greatest Weakness - 5/16/2009 10:25:33 PM
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LCannon
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James 1:14-'But one is tempted by one's own desire, being lured and enticed by it; 15 then, when that desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin, and that sin, when it is fully grown, gives birth to death. 16 Do not be deceived, my beloved. '
The first glance is a surprise, the second imagination is enticement and three is entertainment. Temptation is choice when one will entertain the imagination.
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RE: A Mans Greatest Weakness - 5/18/2009 11:21:38 PM
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dwain
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quote:
ORIGINAL: drstrat82
quote:
It becomes lust when you stop caring about her wants and needs and only think about your own. What I mean is when you stop thinking about respecting her and start thinking about gratifying yourself, it's lust.
I like this. I find it difficult to believe that Jesus would turn His eyes from anyone (the old bouncing of the eyes trick). No, He would look at them in the eyes and love them for who they are. If we (men) would look at them (women) in the eye and love them with the love of God instead of making them objects of our desire, then the seed of lust would fall on rocky ground and die.
I kept this in mind for the past 3 days... good post. It hurts me at times when I am the object of an "eye bounce". Go figure?!? Wrong section? A guy sometimes needs a female to look for something in his eyes / face / countenance.
I don't think the Holy Spirit will lead anyone into a staring contest though. 
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Deut. 33:27 The eternal God is thy refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.
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RE: A Mans Greatest Weakness - 5/18/2009 11:29:36 PM
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dwain
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quote:
ORIGINAL: LCannon
James 1:14-'But one is tempted by one's own desire, being lured and enticed by it; 15 then, when that desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin, and that sin, when it is fully grown, gives birth to death. 16 Do not be deceived, my beloved. '
The first glance is a surprise, the second imagination is enticement and three is entertainment. Temptation is choice when one will entertain the imagination.
Good post. Thanks. Sounds like insight gained from the Holy Spirit and life experience. Don't know about the imagining though, there are good Godly directions that can be acted on realistically.
Conversation with eye contact, for instance. Are you in school? I noticed your car has a Davidson
parking sticker. Do you have a brother? Do you live in town? Do you attend church?
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Deut. 33:27 The eternal God is thy refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/19/2009 5:54:46 PM
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mec
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as being single, lust to me is anything past the woman's natural beauty. Anything past that is lust. Now it could possibly be constantly thinking of only the woman, more than you should be, than it could lead to idolatry.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/21/2009 3:19:58 PM
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DaveW
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The issue is not what is "lust" as that word never occurs in scripture. The issue is what is meant by epithumeo, the Greek word translated "lust" in our english versions. It simply means any strong desire, good or bad. There is a verse in Luke where 2 forms of the word appear; noun and verb; but is not translated "lust." It is amusing to substitute the L word in there: (borrowed from the ASV)
Luke 22:15 And he said unto them, With [lust] I have [lust]ed to eat this passover with you before I suffer:
Jesus speaking. Same word.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/21/2009 11:01:30 PM
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nuclear_sidewalk
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I think it's the difference between simply noticing a pretty woman and then actually taking a 2nd, 3rd, longer glance. It's not your fault for noticing, but we usually cross the line when we dwell on it.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/22/2009 2:55:08 PM
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Memphis_Dwight
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The only time that I think it is wrong to look at a woman to want her for yourself is when she belongs to another man.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/22/2009 11:23:31 PM
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mec
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I agree with nuclear,
so what if she doesnt belong to another man, can you still look for a long period of time and let it dwell, Im saying if its a random girl you wont see after the moment, not like "the one" which seems it could suggest.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/27/2009 3:15:14 AM
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dwain
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Memphis_Dwight
The only time that I think it is wrong to look at a woman to want her for yourself is when she belongs to another man.
Are you saying that some women do not belong to Christ?
Want her for what?
A good way to look is to see if she might need your help, and to be looking for ways you can love her as Christ loves you.
Lust
Lust
[14] But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed.
[15] Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.
_____________________________
http://www.home.earthlink.net/~dwainfred/thegoodnewsofjesuschrist/
http://www.home.earthlink.net/~dwainfred/
Deut. 33:27 The eternal God is thy refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 5/28/2009 10:55:11 AM
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bobbyb_
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Personally, I kinda feel that the line is crossed over from just admiration to lust when the thought about the girls attractiveness is all you can think about, plus the other thoughts that follow, if you catch my drift. There's nothing wrong with saying Wow, that is one beautiful woman! But when your thought starts changing over to I wonder what she looks like without that dress..., then you've got a problem on your hands and lust has taken over.
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RE: At what point does it become LUST - 6/10/2009 8:58:03 AM
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19ramman85
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quote:
ORIGINAL: bobbyb_
Personally, I kinda feel that the line is crossed over from just admiration to lust when the thought about the girls attractiveness is all you can think about, plus the other thoughts that follow, if you catch my drift. There's nothing wrong with saying Wow, that is one beautiful woman! But when your thought starts changing over to I wonder what she looks like without that dress..., then you've got a problem on your hands and lust has taken over.
And I"ll be a bit more explicit ...... start to have sexual fantasies about her, making time/plans to be around her more, she's on your mind more than your wife/gf, etc.
Yup - then my friend - you have crossed the line!
-charles
< Message edited by 19ramman85 -- 6/10/2009 12:28:38 PM >
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