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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/28/2009 5:04:53 PM
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PastorPatricia
Posts: 192
Joined: 8/6/2005
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Hi,
Our relationship is very strong, we don't fuss about who pays for what, if we are in Walmart one or the other will usually pay for what ever we have in the cart. Our tithe is on a automatic withdrawal, I can see any bank statement and so can he. We decide on big purchases together, our savings are a shared responsibility. We just find that for the day to day stuff that it's easier to keep our money separate so we know what's in our account from day to day. We really don't see this arrangement as having any effect on our marriage - it's just practical for us. I totally agree that a marriage is the most important relationship we'll have on this earth but I don't see any way it would improve it to be annoyed by the other partner withdrawing money and my bouncing a cheque.
_____________________________
But be sure to fear the Lord and serve him faithfully with all your heart; consider what great things he has done for you. Is. 12:24
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/28/2009 6:08:10 PM
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Covaan_Meshuga
Posts: 3171
Joined: 6/8/2005
From: being knit together in my mother's womb
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quote:
ORIGINAL: PastorPatricia
We've been happily married for 47 years and separate accounts works for us. . . .
I think our five children, fourteen grandchildren and three great grandchildren might disagree with you. We are very much married and it's simply a method that works for us. Maybe it works for others - maybe not. . . .
Our relationship is very strong, . . . We just find that for the day to day stuff that it's easier to keep our money separate so we know what's in our account from day to day. We really don't see this arrangement as having any effect on our marriage - it's just practical for us. I totally agree that a marriage is the most important relationship we'll have on this earth but I don't see any way it would improve it to be annoyed by the other partner withdrawing money and my bouncing a cheque.
I SO agree! The idea of complete joint accounts is a scary one for me, and one I had not done until recent years, and it still causes some of that gray hair I must go get dyed -- spending yet more money. I struggle with our joint account at times, but because I pay all the bills, not him, it is getting easier as time passes.
_____________________________
While in prayer or praise, I am only as devoted to G-d as I am in my most private moments.
Abiyah, if you had known them as G-d knows them, you would have answered them differently.
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/28/2009 8:11:08 PM
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Martachoo
Posts: 119
Joined: 4/13/2005
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What's important is that the financial system works for the couple. Bills are paid on time, checks are not bouncing left and right, major purchases are decided together, there is peace and no one has a secret (like a credit card with a huge balance!). A couple could have a joined account but fail to communicate well and constantly fight about who is doing what with money. So to me, whether or not the accounts are joined or separate is irrelevant. It doesn't say anything about the state of the marriage or commitment.
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/28/2009 8:55:10 PM
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nealmorsefan
Posts: 584
Joined: 10/18/2007
From: Boise
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quote:
ORIGINAL: PastorPatricia
Hi,
Our relationship is very strong, we don't fuss about who pays for what, if we are in Walmart one or the other will usually pay for what ever we have in the cart. Our tithe is on a automatic withdrawal, I can see any bank statement and so can he. We decide on big purchases together, our savings are a shared responsibility. We just find that for the day to day stuff that it's easier to keep our money separate so we know what's in our account from day to day. We really don't see this arrangement as having any effect on our marriage - it's just practical for us. I totally agree that a marriage is the most important relationship we'll have on this earth but I don't see any way it would improve it to be annoyed by the other partner withdrawing money and my bouncing a cheque.
OK so you are basically confirming my position. It's not that you have your money and he has his money as the thread suggests, but that you both have an agreed upon method as to spending your (plural) money. Now I get where you are coming from.
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/28/2009 9:07:47 PM
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nealmorsefan
Posts: 584
Joined: 10/18/2007
From: Boise
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Holdcard
We pay separately all the time. Not as far as my wife and myself, but we are guardians for a person with a disability. We need to use his money for his purchases.
See, now that's a totally different thing. You don't have any choice because your dependent is not married to you.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Holdcard
I have everything separated before we get to checkout though, so it's not like everyone has to wait on me. Is it really that much of a pain to ring me up twice? It's just like ringing up the next customer so I don't understand your response.
If you are in the speedy checkout lane, yes it is. I tend to work the speedys most often and people come up with more items than they are supposed to have but then end up having multiple transactions. If you do this, take note of who the cashier and especially the people behind you in line look at you. I'm not saying.....I'm just saying.....
quote:
Original: Holdcard
There are more people than I thought successfully using the his money her money system. Most of the people I was talking about in the original post were either new Christians or coming out of some major issues. I think as long as communication and prayer is present for the major decisions whatever works is fine.
This is exactly the issue. Communication. People who use separate accounts do not HAVE to communicate, which means they WON'T communicate. Maybe it's just me (I doubt it), but habits in life tend to spill over from one area to another even if its only subtle. When you call people "successful" in the his/her money scenario, I call them "lazy" or "uncommitted". Why shouldn't the people of God commit to become "one flesh" with their spouses in an all-encompassing way?
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/28/2009 10:36:51 PM
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bolt.
Posts: 1755
Joined: 4/29/2005
From: Canada
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That's really one of the more absurd things I've read here, nealmorsefan. My husband and I do not communicate abou who will change the furnace filter (him) and who will maintain the cat box (me). I suppose we could just have a talk about it and decide day-by-day who might do each task, but would that somehow make us more committed? Pure silliness.
My husband and I have our money fully joint, but we hardly ever talk about it. You see, he trusts me, and I mind everything all by myself, so we don't HAVE to communicate. Funny I've never noticed the spill-over effect you mentioned -- unless it's that we also don't talk about household responsibilites like the cat boz. Seriously, maybe it's just me, but don't other committed married people have better things to talk about than the balance in the checking account? (and the state of the furnace filter?)
I find it quite arrogant, that you think other people might think they are perfectly happy, and you think they might not know that they are having a terrible marriage, because you can tell that they are "lazy" and "uncommitted" and outside of God's will. just by knowing their money scenario. It must be nice to be slightly omniscient, and know things about others marriages that they don't know themselves.
Really...
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/29/2009 11:32:36 AM
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nealmorsefan
Posts: 584
Joined: 10/18/2007
From: Boise
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quote:
ORIGINAL: pbaribeault
That's really one of the more absurd things I've read here, nealmorsefan. My husband and I do not communicate abou who will change the furnace filter (him) and who will maintain the cat box (me). I suppose we could just have a talk about it and decide day-by-day who might do each task, but would that somehow make us more committed? Pure silliness.
No, this comment is pure silliness. A large percentage of marriages end in divorce because of financial issues. How many divorces are caused by the cat box or the filter? C'mon. Money is one of the most discussed topics in the Bible by Jesus. If Jesus thinks it's important, shouldn't we?
quote:
Original: pbaribeault
My husband and I have our money fully joint, but we hardly ever talk about it. You see, he trusts me, and I mind everything all by myself, so we don't HAVE to communicate.
Mmhmm...You don't HAVE to communicate?...I'm not saying...I'm just saying...
quote:
Original: pbaribeault
Funny I've never noticed the spill-over effect you mentioned. Seriously, maybe it's just me, but don't other committed married people have better things to talk about than the balance in the checking account?
Really? In what other areas are you letting your husband off the hook? Ever get an odd feeling about one of your children being older than you?
quote:
Original: pbaribeault
I find it quite arrogant, that you think other people might think they are perfectly happy, and you think they might not know that they are having a terrible marriage, because you can tell that they are "lazy" and "uncommitted" and outside of God's will. just by knowing their money scenario. It must be nice to be slightly omniscient, and know things about others marriages that they don't know themselves.
Really...
Truth is arrogant, m'dear. Jesus was the most arrogant person alive in His time. Understand that, here in the USA, we value the pursuit of happiness (Happyness, if you're Will Smith) as one of our core values and, while this sounds a noble ideal on the surface, it makes us a self-centered, self-pleasing society. That kind of attitude is counter to the standard of our scripture: deny yourself, take up your cross and all that. This is not to say that you won't attain a measure of happiness while being in the center of God's will, but it is not a guarantee or a given outcome of obedience. Is it so unimaginable that the people of God in America are lazy with the finances in who they relate to God? Do you know that less than 25% (I can't remember the exact number but it's pretty low) of the Christians who attend church regularly actually tithe anywhere close to the traditional 10% of their income?
You know, I think the problem with this thread is its title. It needs to be changed from "His Money, Her Money" to "HIS money". Think about it.
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/29/2009 11:40:06 AM
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ta_mosquito
Posts: 11008
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From: from MN, now in Ontario :D
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See, we have complications due to the cross-border marriage.
I have a couple USA accounts. I did put his name on my checking account, but we haven't done that with the savings account yet. My name isn't on his savings account here, nor on the investment account (not an IRA).
We were going to merge it all, but that causes HUGE tax ramifications. Bottom line with the tax situation is, if we're joint on everything, we pay the worst tax scenario in both countries. (If one country doesn't tax it and the other does, we have to pay tax to the country that does. If one country taxes at a higher rate, we'll be taxed at the higher rate.) So we're probably not going to merge everything, and we're wondering if it was unwise of us to set up a spousal RRSP (IRA) for me here in Canada, as that's causing problems already.  And it's also a good thing I'm not on the mortgage and house title! Another can o' worms there!
BUT, other than that, we've got the two checking accounts (one in each country) that we're joint on. He makes the money; we both spend it. I haven't had any regular income yet since we've been married, but if/when that happens, we'll pool our resources then, too.
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LibriVox: acoustical liberation of books in the public domain
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/29/2009 12:29:02 PM
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nealmorsefan
Posts: 584
Joined: 10/18/2007
From: Boise
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quote:
ORIGINAL: ta_mosquito
See, we have complications due to the cross-border marriage.
I have a couple USA accounts. I did put his name on my checking account, but we haven't done that with the savings account yet. My name isn't on his savings account here, nor on the investment account (not an IRA).
We were going to merge it all, but that causes HUGE tax ramifications. Bottom line with the tax situation is, if we're joint on everything, we pay the worst tax scenario in both countries. (If one country doesn't tax it and the other does, we have to pay tax to the country that does. If one country taxes at a higher rate, we'll be taxed at the higher rate.) So we're probably not going to merge everything, and we're wondering if it was unwise of us to set up a spousal RRSP (IRA) for me here in Canada, as that's causing problems already. And it's also a good thing I'm not on the mortgage and house title! Another can o' worms there!
BUT, other than that, we've got the two checking accounts (one in each country) that we're joint on. He makes the money; we both spend it. I haven't had any regular income yet since we've been married, but if/when that happens, we'll pool our resources then, too.
Another good example of multiple accounts being necessary. Look, I don't want to flame people for their choice in financial diversification or whatnot. In the end, it's probably not going to affect your eternal soul whether you share accounts with your spouse or not. It just seems to benefit your relationship if you do have that level of cooperation.
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/29/2009 12:56:06 PM
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Holdcard
Posts: 269
Joined: 1/14/2009
From: Phoenix, Arizona
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I think the "trust" issue is valid. My wife trusts me to make good decisions. I've more or less earned that trust by being faithful and responsible. She's actually told me several times how much she appreciates me taking care of the bills. If I want to pay this one down or just make the monthly this time she trusts my judgment.
We each have a self imposed discretionary funds (figured into our joint balance and small amounts of cash) with agreed upon limits and bigger purchases are talked about and prayed about before the purchase is made. It did take us a while to figure this part out. Praying over stuff is always a good plan.
This works very well for us, but I would not expect this to work for everyone nor would I seek to impose this. If separate accounts are working and not causing problems I'm of the opinion that if it's not broken don't try to fix it.
We have a very strong marriage, but there are many things we do independently of each other and as long as those bounds are discussed and agreed upon in the first place I see no detriment to the relationship. People have to do what works for them (within Biblical boundaries course). In a marriage we need to support each other, if I can't balance the checkbook and she can then what's the problem? It should be her job because she's better at it than I am. Her balancing the checkbook instead of me makes us stronger as a couple. Although we have been frustrated over money in the past we have never fought over it.
On the Walmart thing, I'm probably one of the few people that does actually avoid the express lane if one of my purchases are over the limit. On occasion they do call me over from another line though. Even in the express lane I sometimes have to separate and pay with 2 accounts. Are you saying that's an issue even in the express lane or did I miss interpret what you were saying?
Holdcard
_____________________________
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If You Want To POPULATE Heaven
You Have To PLUNDER Hell!!
4th Man Ministries
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/29/2009 2:27:11 PM
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Covaan_Meshuga
Posts: 3171
Joined: 6/8/2005
From: being knit together in my mother's womb
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I agree with most of you. My husband and I also have more important things to do and say to one another than to sit about talking about the finances. We speak of our concerns for the economy and for our children's and grand-children's finances and futures, but we rarely even think of our own.
I take care of the bills, they are paid on time, and he knows this is the way it is. He brings home his receipts, as do I, and they are placed in a box in date-order, but neither of us question the other about them. That's it.
We then have more time to sit about talking about the Bible and the things of G-d, rather than bothering with this other stuff. Should we ever get into financial straights, as we likely will as (if) the economy disintegrates, we will discuss them. Why bother if there is no problem? Finances are just not as interesting as too many other things.
_____________________________
While in prayer or praise, I am only as devoted to G-d as I am in my most private moments.
Abiyah, if you had known them as G-d knows them, you would have answered them differently.
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/29/2009 3:48:55 PM
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nealmorsefan
Posts: 584
Joined: 10/18/2007
From: Boise
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Holdcard
On the Walmart thing, I'm probably one of the few people that does actually avoid the express lane if one of my purchases are over the limit. On occasion they do call me over from another line though. Even in the express lane I sometimes have to separate and pay with 2 accounts. Are you saying that's an issue even in the express lane or did I miss interpret what you were saying?
Holdcard
Well, if we call you over, of course it's not an issue. Even if you come yourself it's not an issue if someone else isn't waiting behind you. It's just a little rude to other customers to take up the express lane with multiple transactions which takes more time.
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/29/2009 3:56:36 PM
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nealmorsefan
Posts: 584
Joined: 10/18/2007
From: Boise
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Covaan_Meshuga
I agree with most of you. My husband and I also have more important things to do and say to one another than to sit about talking about the finances. We speak of our concerns for the economy and for our children's and grand-children's finances and futures, but we rarely even think of our own.
I take care of the bills, they are paid on time, and he knows this is the way it is. He brings home his receipts, as do I, and they are placed in a box in date-order, but neither of us question the other about them. That's it.
We then have more time to sit about talking about the Bible and the things of G-d, rather than bothering with this other stuff. Should we ever get into financial straights, as we likely will as (if) the economy disintegrates, we will discuss them. Why bother if there is no problem? Finances are just not as interesting as too many other things.
You're sort of missing my point and proving it at the same time. Because you and your husband communicate about the finances (each knowing how much is available and keeping each other abreast of what has been spent), you do have a healthy financial relationship. I'm not saying you have to sit down for three hours every night and discuss Keynesian theory, for goodness sakes! My position on this thread is aimed at couples that keep separate accounts and separate streams of money. One might also call them...roommates! Roommates with benefits!
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/29/2009 6:20:21 PM
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Holdcard
Posts: 269
Joined: 1/14/2009
From: Phoenix, Arizona
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: nealmorsefan
Well, if we call you over, of course it's not an issue. Even if you come yourself it's not an issue if someone else isn't waiting behind you. It's just a little rude to other customers to take up the express lane with multiple transactions which takes more time.
I guess I never really looked at it that way but I see your point. I figure as long as I don't go over the item limit with either transaction it should be no big deal. Actually most of the time I have more than the limit so it's not really an issue.
The one issue I did have they fixed. There was no sign, but the cashier kind of hollered at me for using the express lane with too many items. I looked around, up down and sideways and there was no sign. So I asked "where's the sign?" The cashier said there isn't one, so I asked how I was supposed to know, they replied that there was no way I could have known. I just shook my head, paid for my stuff and went on my way.
I know you didn't want any Walmart employee comments, but some of the people that work there.... well..... You get the idea.
Covaan_Meshuga
We don't really spend a whole lot of time talking finance, you're absolutely right once the financial plan is agreed upon there are much better things to talk about. Actually any more there's very little time spent on finances, we've found a system that works.
Holdcard
_____________________________
---
If You Want To POPULATE Heaven
You Have To PLUNDER Hell!!
4th Man Ministries
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/29/2009 10:08:04 PM
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davelinde
Posts: 437
Joined: 5/5/2006
From: New Jersey
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We are and always have viewed the money as completely "ours".
If we divvied up the assets and bills into "yours" and "mine" it would surely seem like setting up a conflict that shouldn't exist, so I'd be concerned about anyone who kept individual accounting of their funds.
Tax implications eg IRA's or multinational issues etc are completely separate from this in my mind. btw - for numerous years we have funded my wife's IRA with "our" money even though she has not had income for a while (so in theory making "our" money just "hers"). In fact I view that as tax planning with our money.
Apparently there are some here who keep separate accounts (what exactly is the reason for that?) and do fine together with money. Personally, I wouldn't suggest it.
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/29/2009 10:31:36 PM
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bolt.
Posts: 1755
Joined: 4/29/2005
From: Canada
Status: online
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quote:
Really? In what other areas are you letting your husband off the hook? Ever get an odd feeling about one of your children being older than you?
Since this is a direct question, and quite an offensive one too, I feel the need to answer it.
My husband is not and never has been on a hook. Anything in our relationship that he does, gives, contributes or says is an act of true love and grace. He owes me nothing but what he has offered to me and the committments he has given freely. I set no standards for him, because it is not my place to do so. I have covenanted to him my love, respect, and lifelong companionship with no strings or hooks attached.
Does that sound like I consider him a child?
Personally I consider my marriage a joy, a sucsess, a wonderful foundation for our children and a relationship that glorifies God our father. We consider ourselves stewards of all we have been graced with.
But perhaps I am mistaken. It seems like you think you know us better than we know ourselves. I'll let you know if we ever spontanously blink and find ourselves divorced because we weren't making our bank balance the substance of our conversational life.
The "truth" you are speaking is nothing more than statistics and assumptions -- and you should really refrain from going around insulting other's practices in marriage based on it. The truth is that, "Marriage should be honoured by all." You might want to try that instead of degrading anybody's marriage covenant and union before God (calling them 'roommates with benefits') simply because you do not think they are managing their money wisely.
PS -- You appear to have forgotten that the internet is an international medium of communication. Not everybody here is an American, nor does the whole world live by American values.
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/30/2009 12:28:01 AM
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Holdcard
Posts: 269
Joined: 1/14/2009
From: Phoenix, Arizona
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I think I'm seeing a common thread here. People do what works for them. I think that's great and being financially responsible honors God.
From what I've read there really are no secrets between husbands and wives, it's just that one may excel at the task or simply prefer to do or nott. In our household there are no secrets, I may handle the technical/physical end of it but my wife is joint on everything, has all the passwords to the computer, records, statements etc. Once in a while she'll pull up Quicken just to look at how we're doing. That's never bothered me a bit, nor should it.
Of course I'm hearing from more mature, responsible Christians than I'm used to. I believe that's the difference in what we're seeing in this thread. My opinion is only that, an opinion based on my life. The concept of his and hers (the way our friends talked) was totally foreign to us. They had a whole different concept than we're seeing here. In their cases there were secrets, irresponsibility etc. I'm convinced that their problem was not separate money, checking accounts and such, it was the secrets, immaturity and attitudes they had.
Hearing how some other Christians handle their monthly obligations has been enlightening to say the least. I'm convinced that it doesn't necessarily matter who does the bills, what matters is how they are done and in what spirit.
Holdcard
_____________________________
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If You Want To POPULATE Heaven
You Have To PLUNDER Hell!!
4th Man Ministries
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/30/2009 12:59:54 AM
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Mrs.Wifey
Posts: 3218
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The Gorgeous plains of Colorado
Status: offline
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quote:
PS -- You appear to have forgotten that the internet is an international medium of communication. Not everybody here is an American, nor does the whole world live by American values.
Did I miss something?
Btw, kudos to you for your very graceful post(probably more grace then I would have had) 
_____________________________
Ryanne- trying hard to be my husband's girlfriend and my daughter's mother.
I'll keep my guns, freedom, and money- you can keep "the change."
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/30/2009 8:38:08 PM
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Covaan_Meshuga
Posts: 3171
Joined: 6/8/2005
From: being knit together in my mother's womb
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: nealmorsefan
You're sort of missing my point and proving it at the same time. Because you and your husband communicate about the finances (each knowing how much is available and keeping each other abreast of what has been spent), you do have a healthy financial relationship. I'm not saying you have to sit down for three hours every night and discuss Keynesian theory, for goodness sakes! My position on this thread is aimed at couples that keep separate accounts and separate streams of money. One might also call them...roommates! Roommates with benefits!
quote:
ORIGINAL: nealmorsefan
My position on this thread is aimed at couples that keep separate accounts and separate streams of money. One might also call them...roommates! Roommates with benefits!
Oh, this is just plain ugly -- ugly and excruciatingly unloving, ungodly, and incredible! I am stunned that you would write this way!
And so very sorry, but my husband does not know what is in any of our accounts at any time! He doesn't find it important to check up on me, he doesn't check up on me, and we are just fine. As I had written above, we don't need to talk about it. If I hear that he is intending to spend more than can be spent in a particular account, I ask him to wait or take the money from a different account -- that is the extent of our normal discussions.
_____________________________
While in prayer or praise, I am only as devoted to G-d as I am in my most private moments.
Abiyah, if you had known them as G-d knows them, you would have answered them differently.
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/30/2009 11:55:49 PM
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NotDoneYet
Posts: 196
Joined: 12/11/2007
From: Virginia
Status: online
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Covaan_Meshuga
quote:
ORIGINAL: nealmorsefan
You're sort of missing my point and proving it at the same time. Because you and your husband communicate about the finances (each knowing how much is available and keeping each other abreast of what has been spent), you do have a healthy financial relationship. I'm not saying you have to sit down for three hours every night and discuss Keynesian theory, for goodness sakes! My position on this thread is aimed at couples that keep separate accounts and separate streams of money. One might also call them...roommates! Roommates with benefits!
quote:
ORIGINAL: nealmorsefan
My position on this thread is aimed at couples that keep separate accounts and separate streams of money. One might also call them...roommates! Roommates with benefits!
Oh, this is just plain ugly -- ugly and excruciatingly unloving, ungodly, and incredible! I am stunned that you would write this way!
And so very sorry, but my husband does not know what is in any of our accounts at any time! He doesn't find it important to check up on me, he doesn't check up on me, and we are just fine. As I had written above, we don't need to talk about it. If I hear that he is intending to spend more than can be spent in a particular account, I ask him to wait or take the money from a different account -- that is the extent of our normal discussions.
I totally agree! We have separate accounts...I don't know what is in his, he doesn't know what is in mine. We discuss the "big stuff" and the little stuff just isn't worth discussing...
And as far as communication goes...we talk about anything and everything...he is my BESTFRIEND and confidant...
_____________________________
Remember, normal is just a setting on the dryer!
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/31/2009 12:12:58 AM
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nealmorsefan
Posts: 584
Joined: 10/18/2007
From: Boise
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Covaan_Meshuga
As I had written above, we don't need to talk about it. If I hear that he is intending to spend more than can be spent in a particular account, I ask him to wait or take the money from a different account -- that is the extent of our normal discussions.
Huh? How are you not being the financial head in that situation? Your statement indicates that your husband needs your permission to access your account/accounts...and you don't see a problem with that?
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RE: His Money, Her Money - 5/31/2009 12:29:27 AM
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Mrs.Wifey
Posts: 3218
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The Gorgeous plains of Colorado
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: nealmorsefan
quote:
ORIGINAL: Covaan_Meshuga
As I had written above, we don't need to talk about it. If I hear that he is intending to spend more than can be spent in a particular account, I ask him to wait or take the money from a different account -- that is the extent of our normal discussions.
Huh? How are you not being the financial head in that situation? Your statement indicates that your husband needs your permission to access your account/accounts...and you don't see a problem with that?
I don't get what the problem is? DH and I work our finances much the same as Abiyah and her husband. DH takes care of our investments, and I take care of our everyday finances(we have all joint accounts). He asks me how much money is left after paying bills, and we each get a certain amount of spending money. If he needs to make a major purchase I tell him when it will be possible, and I budget for it
What's the big deal?
_____________________________
Ryanne- trying hard to be my husband's girlfriend and my daughter's mother.
I'll keep my guns, freedom, and money- you can keep "the change."
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