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RE: Sex outside of marriage - 6/27/2009 1:15:32 AM
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starcraft
Posts: 58
Joined: 4/2/2009
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I wouldn't be upset with your fellow Christian. Alot of people go to great lengths to avoid all forms of confrontation and conflict. Alot of it is just personalities, and maybe there was some unseen or unspoken reason others have suggested.
I can't believe a woman who works to protect children would be suggesting teenage sex outside of marriage is o.k. If she would reject anything spiritual, as it sounds like she would, approach it from a practical, financial, health, emotional angle. Throw a few statistics at her - they all back us up! I recently did this with a gay lifestyle debate and thought it was much more persuasive for this female co-worker of mine. I always try to remember that Gods laws are to protect us!!!!
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RE: Sex outside of marriage - 6/27/2009 3:42:51 AM
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Little_1
Posts: 1202
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Sometimes I struggle with the work I am in because we often cannot bring what is considered 'religious' persuasion into the workplace. GP's give children the pill or other contraception so that they do not become pregnant and they believe this is a lesser evil than the child becoming pregnant at an early age and being unable to look after the child properly. I can see where the GP is coming from practically but everything within me wants to yell out "Teach them God's ways and that is the contraception which will protect them, i.e. saying "no"!" But of course it is pointless to try and get this point across in discussions and I agree. I do however believe we should present the truth of God's Word when opportunities arise and inform them of such in a spirit of love and then leave God to do the rest. This is one sense of what I mean by defending the Gospel. When I say defending, I do not mean having explosive arguments - that would only serve to ruin friendships and trusts. I do however mean sharing what God's Word says (where it is wise to do so) and letting them decide for themselves.
I have been in a personal situation where my 14 year old step daughter (at the time) was having underage sex. The GP prescribed the pill to her and this greatly upset her father and I. I did try to impose my faith upon her at the time of discovering this and in the end, I realised it was utterly pointless to do so! I cannot convert her. Later I got an opportunity to speak to her about the risks concerning what she was doing to herself both physically and emotionally and I calmly shared what God's Word says and why God teaches such principles as abstaining from sex until marriage. She did listen in this context and in the end understood that we wanted what was in her best interests but there was a lot of grief in between times - some of it caused because I tried to impose what the Bible teaches upon her rather than just presenting God's truth, praying and leaving the situation in God's hands. She is still having underage sex (she's 18 now) but I have advised her concerning this and I can only leave the matter in God's hands and continue to pray. I cannot convert her and to press the matter with her will not do any good.
I have seen the destruction underage sex can cause. It causes so much grief, concern and pain. It can also drive a wedge in families when not approached properly. So yes, there is a time to speak and a time to remain silent and with God's help we can know when to do so. I admit I didn't get it right first time around with my step daughter but with God's help, a situaiton arose where He did present an opportunity to do so correctly...
< Message edited by Little_1 -- 6/27/2009 3:56:12 AM >
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RE: Sex outside of marriage - 6/27/2009 4:12:08 AM
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Little_1
Posts: 1202
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Liveloved
Jesus attracted sinners to Himself---scripture speaks of His hanging out with sinners. He didn't speak words of condemnation but words of love and they were convicted.
P.S. This is very wise counsel.
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RE: Sex outside of marriage - 6/27/2009 4:35:17 PM
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terryjohn
Posts: 313
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The truth is no one should be forced into belieivng anything for even if they have it would not save them. The arguments of such people are beginning to reap destruction and death on their followers and that is argument enough. Our argument is in the living of holy blameless lives. If we are blamed for protecting our children from those who would sexually abuse them, are we too blame for don't even the laws of men do that?
People are not interested in the wisdom of God until their own logic has been frustrated. Christ did this in talking to men about what makes a man clean. I personaly believe everyone should be allowed to live out the consequences of their beliefs so that others may learn not to blaspheme the truth but more importantly learn the error of their ways before it is too late.
In the end righteousness can only be expected from the righteous.
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RE: Sex outside of marriage - 6/27/2009 5:06:29 PM
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SonInMe1
Posts: 1886
Joined: 4/16/2005
From: my mom by God
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Ask the pharesees about Jesus' words of love.
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You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.
James 4:4
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RE: Sex outside of marriage - 6/28/2009 2:54:20 AM
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Little_1
Posts: 1202
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quote:
ORIGINAL: terryjohn
The truth is no one should be forced into belieivng anything for even if they have it would not save them.
This is true.
quote:
The arguments of such people are beginning to reap destruction and death on their followers and that is argument enough. Our argument is in the living of holy blameless lives. If we are blamed for protecting our children from those who would sexually abuse them, are we too blame for don't even the laws of men do that?
Not quite sure what you mean by this?? Please could you explain.
quote:
People are not interested in the wisdom of God until their own logic has been frustrated. Christ did this in talking to men about what makes a man clean. I personaly believe everyone should be allowed to live out the consequences of their beliefs so that others may learn not to blaspheme the truth but more importantly learn the error of their ways before it is too late.
Very true.
quote:
In the end righteousness can only be expected from the righteous.
Also true.
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RE: Sex outside of marriage - 6/28/2009 2:55:39 AM
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Little_1
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Thanks to everyone who have so far posted. There is some valuable insight and I appreciate this.
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RE: Sex outside of marriage - 6/29/2009 10:21:33 PM
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dctalkgirl
Posts: 137
Joined: 4/26/2009
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I think Little1 and their coworker were both in right. I give Little1 a high-five for speaking out about the truth, But it doesn't mean that your coworker was in wrong for not speaking out. Sometimes for me I don't always know of the right words to say and therefore because I don't want to say the wrong thing I feel the need to not say anything at all. That doesn't make me less of a Christian to those who are comfortable with speaking out. Sometimes I feel the need to pray for that person. I have been in a situation before I got my life right with God where people would shove the bible down my throat and for my own experience that did not work. I needed to be shown love and compassion in a Christlike way. I know of others who need to be treated the same way.
There have been times when I did speak out only by God's grace that He gave me the words. I don't think it's wrong to speak out if done in a loving way nor do I think it's wrong to remain silent if you fear saying the wrong thing. Everybody is different. Sometimes the best thing to do is to live out Jesus love, if people see you trying to love them by actions more than words that can help even more as I once heard "Actions speak louder than words."
Other times it is best to speak up and correct someone in a loving way, over all more importantly no matter what we must treat every situation with love no matter if we choose to speak up or not. That's my opinion anyway.
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RE: Sex outside of marriage - 6/29/2009 10:52:33 PM
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growingseed
Posts: 115
Joined: 5/24/2005
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Everyone needs to hear the truth, that Jesus died for our sins. It's no big deal for those who are saved, but sometimes i do see some who don't know how to open up, and thats ok, for the ones who can, still will be a good example for the others, that it doesn't matter, really because we love the father to pass him on to others. Their are some who plant and others who harvest, the father will work it out.
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RE: Sex outside of marriage - 6/30/2009 3:21:04 PM
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blue1914
Posts: 47
Joined: 6/21/2005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Little_1
I don't know which upset me the most - the fact that someone slighted the Bible (albeit in ignorance) or that the other Christian in the office sat silent! I believe the latter. Perhaps it was wise for my Christian colleague to allow just one Christian to speak this time but it is not the first time she has sat silent and allowed others to mock God's standards... and I have waited and she has said nothing!
I guess I'd ask-when you did speak, did you change your co-worker's mind?
What can we as human beings add to or take away from the word of God?
Your co-worker who mentioned that "the Bible needs to be updated" sounds perfectly like a fool-the Bible tells us exactly how to deal with fools:
Proverbs 26:4-5
4 Do not answer a fool according to his folly,
or you will be like him yourself.
5 Answer a fool according to his folly,
or he will be wise in his own eyes.
In other words, either stay out of a discussion with a fool (or risk looking like one yourself) or don't answer him or her as if they were speaking with wisdom or they may feel like they are wiser than they really are. Instead, answer them with as silly of a statement as they make.
Zeal for God's word is a wonderful thing, but above all, believers are called to be salt and light. Spiritual things are spiritually discerned. If you are speaking to someone who is in darkness, they can't really be expected to speak with wisdom-they have only the darkness of their own hearts to reflect to the world.
Long and short-not every battle is a hill worth dying for-especially when the prize is only the continued prattlings of a fool.
< Message edited by blue1914 -- 6/30/2009 3:41:48 PM >
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RE: Sex outside of marriage - 7/1/2009 7:08:47 PM
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19ramman85
Posts: 360
Joined: 4/10/2008
From: Sandusky, MI
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: mvic
I disagree with the two posters immediately above this post.
Little 1 was correct to speak out.
Whilst it is possible that the originator of the discussion was yanking her chain to see how she would react; by saying nothing or avoiding the subject altogether Little 1 would have played right into their hand and portrayed (wrongly as it happens) a lack of conviction. That's how her silence would have been interpreted even though it's the wrong interpretation.
Furthermore, silence may Well have crushed and extinguished any small flame of Faith within other believers present. They would have felt that if a Spiritually higher Christian remained silent then the argument was not worth defending.
Little 1 did right to speak out and to stand for her Faith. I would have done the same.
There is no need for debate. Just state the facts clearly and leave it at that. If the un-believer does not want to listen that's their choice. But at least the believers present would have listened and taken courage for when a similar situation arises and Little 1 is not there to set an example.
Well there's were we part ays abit there ol friend!
I don't mind getting into religious conversations; at work, in public, where ever. But what I do mind - are those people, who are as ignorant as all get-out, who do decide to talk down religion.
I have talked to, even have some friends/family, who are atheist/agnostic in their believes, that I can carry-on an even somewhat intelligent religious conversation with - as compared to others, that don't believe in God.
-charles
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RE: Sex outside of marriage - 7/3/2009 12:26:11 AM
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all4evrhis
Posts: 7
Joined: 6/5/2009
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You are judging you co-worker and that is wrong. As has been said, we all have our ways to show our faith. Like your co-worker I would not have spoken. If someone ask me one on one, then I will share, not debate. Jesus says they will know us by our walk. I work to make my walk pleasing to God, not man. I have a good friend who will debate anyone. She knows her Bible and I believe that is her calling - to be vocal about God. I on the other hand like behind the scenes. Example: my normal reaction when people use the Lord's name in vane or talks about a sexual conquest, my reaction is a quick prayer: Lord forgive them for they are blind - they know not what they do. If they are a believer, then it is different.
We all are called to witness in different ways. You are outspoken - your co-worker is quiet in her faith. Does her life, the way she lives and acts glorify God? My walk is my voice. My husband was just diagnosed with Early Onset Alzheimer Disease at age 61. This is a real test of my faith. I will be doing a lot of leaning on God through the journey ahead. I hope my walk will glorify God and I know there will be times (I may not even know about) that it will touch people and cause them to seek God. I can't do it - only the Holy Spirit can.
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RE: Sex outside of marriage - 7/4/2009 4:02:43 AM
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Little_1
Posts: 1202
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Thank you to everyone who has responded to this thread. I appreciate your responses - they have been helpful.
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RE: Sex outside of marriage - 7/4/2009 9:35:12 AM
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19ramman85
Posts: 360
Joined: 4/10/2008
From: Sandusky, MI
Status: offline
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You're Very Welcome!
Any Time!
-charles
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. I say that because this approach has not come 'naturally' for me but supernaturally.
