Heavenly Father, I have fallen away. I have turned my back on what I know right and given into temptation yet again. You have redeemed me so many times and have always made sure that I have always had what you knew I needed. I don’t deserve, nor have I ever deserved a life so blessed by you. I don’t deserve what you did for me on that cross. I don’t really appreciate you as I should. I don’t worship you as I should. I don’t live as I should, speak as I should, act, or love as I should. My prayers have grown empty and void as has my life. I am merely existing day to day, hounded by evil spirits that never rest. I need you Father, I need your hand to lift me up and cleanse me. Wrap your loving arms around me and comfort me Lord. Redeem me in your eyes Lord and hold me close. I hate my sins yet I can not escape them. I am so weak and am better at falling than I am standing righteously. I do not deserve to even have an audience with you let alone your rescue. It seems like all I do is disappoint you and fall so very short of any respectable Christian standard. What could you possibly see in me Lord? I am lost Father, I beg you to renew your spirit within me. Lift me up and take my hand, lead me on your path of righteousness for your namesake. Use me again to glorify your perfect name. Wash me clean Father and break the chains that weight me down. Give me purpose and a fire in my heart to do what is right, act and speak as a representative of your kingdom. Father, forgive my selfish prayers. In Jesus beautiful and perfect name I pray.
Welcome to the forum.
Have you ever read 1John1: 8 If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 10 If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word is not in us.
God knows that we constantly fail, we need to pick ourselves up with shamful faces and turn back yet again to God and repent.
The Christian life is not a constant rising slope up to glory, rather it is a jagged up and down line that shows our sucesses and failures in life.
Welcome @TheProdigalSon. We all fall down. It is not how many times we fall down; it is how many times we get up. Sometimes we think that God cannot possibly forgive us. Always remember what Jesus told us.
“Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.” Matthew 18:21-22
If Jesus tells us this being evil, how much more do you feel God, being Holy, will forgive us?
Be blessed, be a blessing,
Peter
Thank you the words brother 
Thank you for your words and reminder