Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, the Lord himself, is the Rock eternal. Isaiah 26:4
How much do you trust God? It’s a question I have to ask myself daily. This weekend marked my 3rd year anniversary in jail. I am a pre-trial detainee facing life for a crime I did not commit. I have no lawyer; the police are corrupt, the judge is corrupt, the DA, and the jailers are all corrupt. All my worldly possessions, wealth, and home were stolen. Both of my parents died 2 years in, and my estranged brother, gone for 20 years, swept in and stole my inheritance and what little was left.
I have been assaulted with serious injury 5 times and told several times I will be killed before I ever reach prison. I go to bed hungry on a regular basis; I’ve lost 80 lbs now. The only family I have, I met here on this forum. If I eat, God gave it to me. Literally, all my hope rests in Him, my future, not just tomorrow or next year, but the rest of my life all rests on my faith in the promises of the Word.
Since I started preaching the Word again here about 2 weeks ago, as I predicted, Satan’s kids began attacking me almost immediately. I was locked down, ridiculed, pushed around, and threatened. I weathered all that pretty well.
Then the devil stepped up his game. An officer, whom I have never had an issue with, was told I called her a racist name. She lashed out in nearly uncontrolled rage and read my charges aloud to her thugs, encouraging them to ‘beat that *!@# to the ground.’ When I heard what she was saying, I confronted her peacefully and asked her why. On bodycam, she threatened me physically, called me several names, and promised to hurt me. Her curses and tirade lasted for several minutes while her gang surrounded me, yelling threats and insulting my faith.
I walked back to my cell and wrote a report to file charges against her for threatening my life. Because of my faith, that report was never sent. I forgave her and handed the situation to God. I take Matthew 5:38-48 very seriously.
My friends, I have nothing to offer the Lord but my obedience and love. The two are intertwined (John 14:21). I can’t go to church, tithe, not do really bad things, or any of those other things I used to pretend mattered. Playtime is over. I must suffer for His glory and trust in Him to provide.
So how much do you trust God? Enough for a raise, new car, better job? When you get sick do you reach for medicine first or pray for healing? Do you trust Him with a lost child or parent? Just how bad do things have to get before you Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding?
My family I say these things to you out of love in hopes that you will start learning to lean on God now and not wait for catastrophe to seek him. Throw all your cares on him because he loves you.