I’d agree that what we know about Judas is “challenging” indeed. A few weeks back I shared a few thoughts elsewhere on this subject, and if it’s allowed here I’ll paste it below.
Judas Iscariot was a conflicted and tragic figure who couldn’t be trusted. He was a lover of money, a thief, a liar and a traitor, “a devil” chosen by Jesus (John 6:70). “Woe to that man by whom the Son of Man is betrayed! It would have been better for him if he had not been born,” Christ said of Judas, a terrifying statement (Matthew 26:24).
Despite all this Judas is also named in Scripture as an apostle. He was one of the 12 who were sent out by Christ as His emissaries. Christ gave each of them power and authority over all the demons and to heal diseases (Luke 9:1). When the 12 returned they reported to Jesus all that they had done and taught. Judas’ involvement in all of this will always be challenging. We must conclude he too exercised that power and authority effectively, and taught too.
But we cannot say that Christ give this authority to Judas because the apostle was genuinely born again. We know that while praying Christ described Judas as “the son of destruction” (John 17:12), one who was “lost…so that the Scripture may be fulfilled.” Although he was chosen as an apostle, he was already pronounced lost before Christ was crucified and had risen from the dead.
Despite his waywardness and treachery, in the end Judas was filled with bitter regret. The money he had earned as a traitor was now despised—he threw it away. Being full of remorse he said, “I have sinned by betraying innocent blood;” “Then he went and hanged himself” (Matthew 27:4-5).
Guilt-ridden and sorrowful for his terrible crime, Judas committed suicide. The sovereignty of God is sobering and exacting.