I want to die , that’s enough for me. depression kills. don’t judge please.
UPDATE : thank you for all @d-o.o-b @KPuff @PeterC @Bestill @timf , I know my situation is not easy at all, but I won’t stop praying .
Keep me in your daily prayers. Thanks.
You only have to worry about God judging you because suicide is an unforgivable action. You would be litterally throwing God’s gift of life back in his face.
Depresion is the devil saying “give up”. Through Christ, you are stronger than the devil. Resist him.
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Hi Riverbank. I’m so sorry to see how bad you’re feeling right now, and maybe bad isn’t a strong enough word. I’ve prayed for you. That our God would encourage and sustain you. Suicide cuts off anything the Lord might do. I know several people who suffer from chronic depression and their life isn’t easy, but they live. I’m not judging, just urging you to put that out of your mind. It’s not an option, I would say. I do believe it’s forgivable as all sin is forgivable. God says that all our days are written in His book. However dark it may seem now, He does have a plan for you. He has a plan for us all.
You are loved Riverbank. Elijah felt the same as you feel now. May our beautiful and wonderful Lord answer your heart as He did for Elijah. Elijah kept on and you must too.
Jesus is bigger than your depression. It has been my experience that when you are weak, He is strong. Lean on Him.
Peter
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Depression is tricky because while there are many things that can be done to manage it, one does not feel like doing so. Most doctors simply throw SSRIs at it and that is not as effective for everyone.
Sometimes allocating a tiny corner of your life to experimenting with some special activity like reading or a hobby, can begin to ignite a spark of interest for an hour or two once a week.
Sometimes a simple multi vitamin with minerals can compensate for any nutritional deficiency that might be a contributing factor. Sometimes experimenting with exercise or sleep schedule can have an impact.
The biggest problem is the lack of energy can make suicide seem the easiest solution. However, God did not create us so that we could have an “easy” life. For Christians, out lives should be lived for others. This is not always easy.
If all the things you said in your DM to me are true, then I think you are dealing with something much greater than clinical depression. If your special circumstances are as you say, then I don’t think reaching out for help on a Christian forum is really going to benefit you very much; I don’t think collecting the opinions of a group of well-meaning disciples who have no idea about your situation can really offer substantial help. I too have no idea how to help you, being so far removed from your situation. Your relationship with your creator is unbreakable. I suggest you place all your weight there, and ask Him how you are to personally bear the easy yoke of Jesus. Plead for the help that can only come from heaven.
Concerned
KP
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You have been constantly in my prayers Brother. Keep staying strong. If you wish to speak on private prayer matters, use the Prayer Chat I created for you and I will be glad to pray with you there.
Thank you for updating us. Yes to daily prayers. Alongside you. With you. In hope with you.