Is masturbation a Sin ?
Human sexuality is a part of our existence. We have chemicals working in our brains that motivate us to propogate the species. All creatures have these drives. Even plants have mechanisms that cause them to polinate and bloom. Life could not exist without these little instigators of motion.
These same chemicals are involved in our day to day. They motivate us to move about our lives. Without them, nothing would work. ADHD, for example, is a condition that inteferes with these processess and makes it extremely difficult for someone to be self motivated, to get started, to be on time, to focus, to do anything that does not immediately pay off with pleasure or enjoyment. One example of what happens when our chemical design is disrupted.
These chemicals are a part of creation, existence, life, which God has made and counted as good.
Speaking purely for guys, the desire to have sex, to pursue a mate, to bond, to release our seed- All healthy and good and within the range of the great design.
Sin comes into play when an activity hurts or harms yourself or another person. This is the best indicator to tell if something is a sin with any activity you do, or don’t do.
Love is the Law, the whole Law, and every instruction that comes from God aligns with this Law or else it is not from God- pure and simple and void of cult instructions that invoke the need to trust the false speaker or prophet of a command delivered in the guise of instruction from God.
Sinful behavior is anything that defies that Law of Love. Pleasure is not a sin. Enjoying your body is not a sin. Masturbation itself is not a sin. But the behavior that leads to hurt or harm- that is what you have to watch out for. But more so, the motivation to cause that hurt or harm. Because it has become a god in your heart, above all other influences.
Anything that is not done in Agape Love is suspect of a personal self serving agenda, which becomes sinful when we are willing to forsake relationship and destroy lives (our own and others) in the pursuit of that personal gain.
Objectifying women, being disrespectful, cat calling, lying and decieving to get laid under the pretense of wanting a relationship, leading a woman on with lies and mind games, and not using condoms to prevent stds and unintended pregnancies if you choose to have sex once with a person or to have sex with multiple people over time outside of a relationship or in a relationship you have not truly committed to in monogomy. And also, not taking responsibility for the consequences of your actions such as bringing a child into this world and not caring for that child or discovering you have an std and chooaing to tell none all your sex partners- all of these are sins because of how the other people are treated and because of how you treat your own body. And because your primary motivation has been a focus on sex that usurps God’s place in your heart, who all along would have been whispering in your ear to do right even as you are tempted to do wrong. Love guides in a way that saves us that selfishness and greed can never achieve.
We each commit sins when we chase after anything other than God while in our pursuit to fill an emptiness within us that only God can fill. Love fills and heals that emptiness, especially that emptiness brought on by trauma, abuse, neglect, all of which creates brokeness and a hunger that never ends. Only God can give us the ultimate fulfillment that we crave that will silence the longing that drives us to do evil instead of what is right and good.
Agape Love, not eros love or desire.which is a fire that can destroy if not kept in check. The Holy Spirit, that living water that over flows and works within us once it is recieved and rebirths us IS that Spirit which keeps us in check. We are guided with our eyes on Christ as our good example, our minds on doing the Will of God to do good in this world. It walks with you and will talk you down, out the door, and away when the path you walk will lead to no good for you or anyone else.
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A question to ask one’s self might be-
Does masturbation control you? By this I mean, has it become your primary focus in life so much so that you neglect loved ones and your own well being, and your relationship with God? Is it an addiction?
Now early on, when we boys hit puberty, when all those wonderful chemicals become activated and our bodies are suddenly transforming, we all tend to hit the road running fast and hard and ready to go with no idea what is happening, where we are going or why. We suddenly become emotional, moody, needy, hungry little monsters driven like rabbits with a need to release a hundred miles an hour. The rules have completely changed almost over night and when it happens none of us know we are surfing a tidal wave of influences, let alone how to take control of the surf board.
There has to be grace in this. There will be mistakes made.
That influence overides a lot of common sense. Good loving parents try to steer their children toward wisdom and right while the kids are drugged out of their flippin minds.under the influence of God’s Blessing and this is why the teenage years are a complete horror for us all.
The chemicals that become active almost guarentee your thoughts will be on sex until you release, once you figure out how it works. Or you will wrestle with it and burn in your lust when it rises, lingering with no outlet until you choose to sin or marry. Though the sex drive is different from person to person while trauma and abuse can turn someone frigid and shut a person down.
All of this is to say, there is a difference between normal activity which at times can appear excessive, and an addiction which is a crutch to help live ones life.
Sometimes trauma can lead us to use pleasure as a drug or a coping mechanism to endure pain, pleaaure derived from sexual activity or even the acr of eating food which can lead to over eating in order to fill an emptiness to feel better. Eating food is not a sin either, but over eatng is not healthy. And using it foos to sooth pain, while momentarily helpful, does not address the issue that needs healing. Neither does shaming the one doing it.
But going back to chemical disruptions, like those caused by ADHD, sometimes the obessive pursuit of pleasure is not caused by trauma. It is because sometimes people are wired differently. They may use pleasure to get from point A to point B to bypass brain chemical issues, because the incentive for pleasure motivates them to move and do something where as during normal or mundane unstimulating moments they cannot find it within themselves to do anything. They also use fear, which is why some projects are consistently late or last minute, when the fear stimulus is active and a threat is looming.
Repenting of sin alone cannot stop the repetition of sin or the disruption caused by any of these conditions.- Addiction, Trauma, Brain Chemistry or wiring. So a focus should be placed on healing, medical treatment, accountability, supoort groups, and counseling, and increasing knowledge and awareness of such things.
Being constructive does more good than judging others for their sins. Demonizng sinners destroys life. But the Holy Spirit leads us toward healing and transformation, uprooting weeds and planting life sustaining grains.
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It is an addiction for me i try and try to overcome it every day, smoedays are better then others, i pray for help so i can control myself.
I just finished editing the above post.
My personal advice-
If it is a problem, pursue answers and healing. Like Counseling with someone well educated and licensed to look for traumas or other issues. A psychologist would be better than a minister, who is not trained in how the mind or heart work. Support groups etc might help. Focussing on Shame and Guilt as motivations to stop will be distractions from this process. Hold the problem in grace. And focus your efforts on finding the root cause. Questions lead us to answers. Answers guide us toward solutions.
And when you deal with the deeper problem, the surface problem will naturally be addressed. The roots of a plant hold it in place, allow it to thrive. From the roots sprout the plant which bares the fruit.
Sin is like the fruit of a plant. It is the byproduct of something else.
You could remove the fruit, but more will eventually grow. You could cut the plant at the stem, but like a weed it may grow back. The only way to truly deal with sin is to remove the plant, roots and all, and replace it with a better plant that will sustain life.
An example-
Someone goes to counseling, traces over eating to being a coping mechanism for low self esteem. The low self esteem came from verbal abuse from a parent who put them down a lot as a child and teenager. Whose parent also did this to them as a child. The person believed at an early age that they were unlovable, and replaced the lack of parental love and self love with the pleasure of food, and ate to feel full inside themselves.
The roots are brought to light. Now it can be intentially and consciously addressed. Events that act as Triggers to do the unwanted behavior can be discovered. The person can begin telling thenselves that they are loved, a 100 times a day and when ever they feel triggered. All to rewire the brain. Dietery choices can change, choosing nutrition over junk food. Focussing on the direction they want to go rather than the direction they do not.
You are completely and utterly worthy of love, as you are. Know this and pursue your best good.
Hi,
Find a passage of Scripture that says masterbation is a sin. But the church gets all pharsical
Almost every teenage boy has wet dreams. So even if you are sleeping, your mind is thinking about sex. By the way, that is not a sin either; that is called growing up. But the church gets all Pharisee about it, and makes kids,.and those people with an addiction, feel like a warm pile of sin on a shingle.
I want you to think about this:
Is there a way you can masturbate without lusting for a person? Then it becomes a tension reliever.
If you wake up with morning wood, finish it off quickly. Remember, don’t think about anything. Just let your mind enjoy the friction. Make it quick and don’t think about lustful things. The shower is another place, use the soap, and let your mind just be about the feeling. This can be done, and without the lust.
Blessings
P.S. To the administrator, please don’t delete this..I worked with teenagers back in the 1970s. This topic was number 1 during our Q and A sessions. Edit it however you want to.
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Thank you for your words, i have started to read help in a hurry by Dr. caroline Leaf. but some time it is beter to talk to someone that does not judge me, thank you. im sorry i have dyslexic so if something is not right you know why.
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I hope what I wrote helps.
Know that you are completely and utterly loved. I pray for your best good. And I want to tell you that you are not alone. None of us are.
God Bless
Remember, There is no Law against Love. And that which is bound in Love is truly free. Those who live in Love are counted as blessed by God. And they are called Beloved, Healer, Wise One, Good Counselor, Friend of God, Child of God.
Love can cover a multitude of sins, for it is in Love that sins are forgiven. And while all other things will eventually fade, Love alone remains Eternal. So anything that becomes One with Love will also know Eternal Life. This is the nature of one who is reborn.
That Spirit carries us in this life like an Ark built for the flood, and when this life is done it carries us from this world into the one to come.
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Do exercises, gym, and stay away from the Internet.
J.