@Samuel_23 Good Post!
#1 If one is to be of the God of heaven, which simply is Love, then one has to be exactly like Him and in His same entity, created by that same state of mind that is not of flesh, is not of this world but in this world. And the idea that God became a man instead of entering into man to be in His same image is purely in ignorance for who God is from lack in meeting the God of Love face to face. 1 John 3 and when you see Him as He is, ye shall be like Him and not before at all.
#2 Heaven and hell is a state of being, not a place that we go to and observe, Jesus was very clear in this in Luke 17:20-21, the kingdom of God does not come with observation it is within you. God is the creator of heaven and hell and man is the temple of one or the other, it is who we are not what we are. Is 45:7. I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the Lord do all these things.
And you are so correct that the difficulty for man to go through that fire and be cleansed from his own ways and ideas for a god from a religious stand point instead of the reality of actually being in Gods same image that of Love, that fire is refining, it burns the soul of man and cleanses it from all iniquities that is performed outside of Love.
#3. As far as the trinity, it is only a concept devised by man where God Himself is absent from they own knowledge. When Father, son, and Holy Spirit is categorized as one simply means, that God is my Father, I am His son by birth rights not adoption as some has been lead to believe, and I have inherited His Spirit that is Love,. These three are one.
Jesus even prayed to his God in John 17 that I be one in the Father as he was one in the Father. The debate comes when one is not born of God and only hold true to mans own concept for a god with noting tangible to confirm a truth but based purely on a belief instead. And as I have stated, one can believe anything about a god but it is a completely different matter when one meets Him face to face and His reality becomes manifest by God Himself and not just speculations based on a belief.