I have never fully lived in the moment, taken times to appreciate everything God has blessed me with, and have acted out of complete ignorance and arrogance most of my life. I justify this attitude because of all the wrong doings to me and my family by others. I was raised with good honest morals and Christian principles but never really grew up in church. I feel guilty and sad that I have been so distant when I know in my heart and soul that there is a higher power. Forgive me God for not keeping you centered and for mistrusting your word and basically forgetting what ive known,especially when I’ve seen your work and how you move in our lives. Saying this i am in desperate despair and in need of guidance and hope. My mother, who has always been my lifeline, my motivation, my world, suffered a stroke in 2018 and has never fully recovered she is such a beacon of lights and full of life and energy but has been suffering debilitating headaches literally daily since the stroke. She’s had so many scans, (CT, mri,) on numerous occasions, with several different doctors and hospitals and still have not been able to receive any answers. The doctors seem so quick to just prescribe another new drug, which cause so many side negative side affects and In turn are only compounding her problems. I tried to advocate for her as needed but feel that almost makes the situation worse since th ego of most of these doctors is that they are the ones who have been working n that profession and that I am just a hypochondriac. I can only describe our most recent experiences has caused me loss in faith and God’s promises. But I know God is upset with me and disappointed as I have not fulfilled God’s plan that he created for my life. In saying this I just pray lord that any outside forces trying to manipulw43 or abuse my
I am sorry that your mother is suffering debilitating headaches.
Is she able to communicate just how painful they are to her doctor.
Do you have a record of how many scans, test etc and of the different drugs she’s been prescribed together with her comments on there effect?
Sometimes getting a doctor to review the history can help them to diagnose the problem.
As for your relationship with God. There are only two states of being, one s either a Christian, or one is not.
Where are you?