After passing through Campus Crusade, a Southern Baptist seminary and numerous churches, and after having deeply immersed myself in theology, apologetics and other studies for 5+ decades, I am now …
A theist.
Not “a Christian,” not “not a Christian.”
Just a theist. (I’m not a deist because I do believe I’ve seen the providential involvement of a deity in my life.)
I don’t believe Jesus was God or thought he was God. I believe he’d be aghast at the idea anyone thinks he’s a member of something called the Trinity. I believe he was an apocalyptic Jew who wrongly expected the end to come in short order.
I believe the Bible is no more inspired than other scriptures or the writings of Henry David Thoreau. I believe bibliolatry and the whole literalist/inerrantist schtick s a bizarre mental straitjacket.
I believe Christianity as it now exists is little more than a political power structure that has little or nothing to do with anything Jesus was talking about. It is an almost entirely worldly institution.
I believe Jesus’ vision was of a radical transformation at both the individual and societal level that has, alas, never really taken root.
I believe most Christians are what they are for reasons of parental and cultural influence, social expediency and other factors unrelated to truth. I believe many Christians pretend to believe or mindlessly parrot doctrines no rational person could possibly believe.
I do not believe the creator of the universe could possibly be as Christianity posits him to be. I do not believe the plan of creation could possibly be what Christianity posits it to be.
I’ve engaged in a spiritual quest vastly more intensive than most people undertake. I cannot believe, or make myself believe, things I am constitutionally incapable of believing.
I thus am just a theist who no longer pretends to have any answers at all. I pray to whatever God there is, in the belief (conviction) and hope that he/she/it exists.
It’s been quite liberating.
If I’m wrong and find myself confronted by the raging God of fundamentalist Christianity, I’ll just have to say “Sorry, pal, I landed where a sincere and diligent search led me, believed what I was constitutionally capable of believing, and did my best to live according to my convictions. If that isn’t good enough for you, throw the book at me if it makes you happy.”
Aren’t you glad you asked? Sorry if I offended anyone, but I’m just through with the nonsense.