You can only find true solace in Christ Jesus and in the comfort of the Holy Spirit, @Sam. For it is written, “Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28). The Lord Himself is “the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation” (2 Corinthians 1:3–4). And Jesus promised, “I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Comforter, to be with you forever, the Spirit of truth” (John 14:16–17). In Him alone the soul finds peace, for “You will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You” (Isaiah 26:3).
You should know me by now, @Sam, I am not here to crush or bruise your tender spirit. For it is written of our Lord, “A bruised reed He will not break, and a smoldering wick He will not quench” (Matthew 12:20). My desire, like His, is to restore gently, as the Scripture says, “If anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness” (Galatians 6:1). I seek to build you up, not tear you down, for “encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing” (1 Thessalonians 5:11).
These books were never excluded from the Bible. They aren’t in the Bible because orthodox Christians following the teachings of Jesus and His Apostles had no use for them; the New Testament is a collection of texts written in the first century by the earliest followers of Jesus. The earliest Gnostic texts were written sometime in the mid to late 2nd century. Which, of course, means that Thomas didn’t write the Gospel of Thomas, Philip didn’t write the Gospel of Philip, and so on. These are heretical texts which simply do not represent the real historical Jesus, what His early followers believed, or how they lived. In fact if you read some of those Gnostic texts you’ll notice a common theme: most of Jesus’ disciples are treated as ignorant evil idiots who just “don’t get it”, there’s instead usually a special chosen disciple whom Jesus chooses to deposit super secrete teachings to, and then all the other disciples mock and deride this special super disciple. This is very clearly meant for the disciples to represent the regular mainstream Christians who were just too stupid to get what Jesus “really” meant, and the super special disciple represents the Gnostics who are special and privileged and received the secret teachings of Jesus that were just too cool and radical for all the normies.
Early Christian writers commonly pointed something important out: They noted that what they were saying is what the generation before them believed, and that they could directly trace a straight line from themselves to Jesus and His Apostles. For example, Irenaeus could say that he learned from Polycarp, and Polycarp was a disciple of the Apostle John. They had direct, tangible connections with Jesus’s Apostles, and to Jesus’ own words. So when Irenaeus says of course there are Four Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John) just like there are four cardinal directions on a compass, because that’s what we’ve received, that’s what was given to us from the beginning, we can trust these Four Gospels as Scripture, we don’t need any other gospels, we have the ones we’re supposed to have, and we read them every Sunday in church, as God’s word–he’s speaking as someone who is directly connected with the historic continuity of Christian truth going back to Jesus. He is therefore a highly reliable witness.
I would not encourage anyone without a mature faith to read anything related to the Gnostic Gospels or other extra-biblical texts. It can do real damage to one’s faith.
The first time I learned about these sorts of texts and general “apocrypha” I was in high school. And while I had grown up in a devout home, I really wasn’t prepared theologically or mentally to handle that information. I was very fortunate that a person from my church was very knowledgeable, and encouraged me to learn more theology and about the history of the Church–exposing myself to Church history and good theological sources gave me a knowledge-base where I could trust that the fundamental teachings of my Christian faith were historically grounded, biblically true, and faithful. I have, in the decades since, become a major advocate for theological and biblical literacy, and that learning Church history is a foundational tool for helping us trust what we believe. There is two thousand years of faithful Christian witness, and that is a treasure we can rejoice in. God has been faithful, and it’s not up to us to always reinvent the wheel–the wheel was invented long ago, and it is solid and good.